Latest news with #counseling
Yahoo
3 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
'I still can't describe what that felt like to be told I had breast cancer'
AS an Intensive Care nurse, Eimear Watson from Enniskillen wasn't concerned when she felt some unusual tissue in her breast, as a previous checkup at the breast clinic had been all clear. Just weeks later, realising she was the only woman left in the waiting room after a mammogram and a series of rapid tests, the news of her breast cancer came as a massive shock. The 37-year-old mum of two bravely faced her months of gruelling treatment and gradually went back to work. It wasn't until three months after this, that all the bottled-up emotion and fears for her husband and two young children, brought her to a standstill. She was overwhelmed with anxiety and turned to Cancer Focus Northern Ireland for counselling. Eimear is sharing her experience to support Cancer Focus Northern Ireland's new Therapeutic Cancer Support Centre opening in Enniskillen this week (28 May), offering direct local access in the South West to the kind of counselling, advice and support which has allowed her to get her life back on track. "As a nurse and Ward Manager in the ICU at the South West Acute Hospital, I thought I knew what to worry about," she said. "So when I noticed a small thickening in my breast in 2023, I brushed it off. I'd been to the breast clinic back in 2015, and it was all clear then. I told myself it was nothing. "Eventually, though, I made an appointment with my GP and got referred for an ultrasound at the breast clinic. I wasn't remotely concerned. "On September 15, 2023, I drove myself to Altnagelvin, more focused on the shopping I'd planned afterwards in Derry than the appointment itself. I only told my husband, Paul, so he'd know where I was. "At the clinic, I put on the pink gown like it was any routine visit. The doctor said they'd start with an ultrasound because of my age. It wasn't until the radiologist said I also needed a mammogram that I began to worry. Something in her tone made time slow down. "Back in the ultrasound room, things escalated quickly. Suddenly, they were talking about a lump, biopsies, and preliminary results. I was told I'd have to wait a few hours. Sitting alone in the waiting room, I remembered a colleague once saying, 'If you're the last one left at the breast clinic, that's not a good sign.' And there I was: alone." Eventually, Eimear's Consultant and Breast Nurse Specialist called her in to deliver the devastating news. "They were the last ones still working. That's when I heard the words: 'You have breast cancer', she said. "I still don't have the words to describe what that felt like. "The following weeks were a blur of appointments and waiting. And I hated the waiting. I'm not a patient person by nature, and all I wanted was to get on with treatment. My surgery was scheduled for 3rd October to remove the lump, and I was told I'd get results ten days later. "I counted every single day. Then, the night before I was due to hear back, I got a call to say there was a delay. It would be another week. That was my lowest moment. I stayed in my pyjamas all day and cried." However, Eimear knew she had to keep going. "Finally, at the end of October, the results came in: the tumour has been completely removed and the surrounding tissue was clear. I was ecstatic. But I also learned the cancer was more aggressive than they had expected. "Oddly, that made things clearer for me. I'm very practical, and I knew I wanted to do everything possible to stop it coming back," she recollected. "So I started four rounds of chemotherapy, followed by two weeks of radiotherapy. My first chemo session was on Paul's birthday. All I could think was: 'In sickness and in health', right? "I stayed at work right up until surgery and couldn't wait to return after. Work was my distraction - it kept me from thinking about what I was really afraid of. The hardest part wasn't the treatment. It was the thoughts about my family that haunted me." Ultimately, it was her children and husband that helped see her through this tough time. "I'd look at my children, Ollie (6) and Chloe (3), and wonder how their lives would be without me," she continued. "I worried about Paul raising them on his own. I thought of every milestone I might miss: birthdays, Christmases, holidays, exams, weddings. Even now, I can't think about my children and cancer in the same sentence without getting emotional. "Radiotherapy finished on February 28. I had lost my hair, spent countless hours and miles on the road between Enniskillen and Altnagelvin, and faced years of hormone therapy with Tamoxifen and Zoladex. But I felt like I was finally through the worst." On April 15 last year, Eimear went back to work and dived back into the chaos of everyday life - being a nurse, a mum, a wife, and even riding her horse again. However, deep down, something didn't feel right. "By July, I looked fine to everyone else," he said. "My hair was growing back, and I had my routine again. But I was consumed with a new fear: what if the cancer came back? The anxiety was relentless and brought me to a standstill. "Thankfully, my Breast Nurse Specialist referred me to Cancer Focus NI's counselling service. That's when I met Helen, my counsellor based in Enniskillen. "She helped me see the positives again and shift my thinking. She even encouraged me to go on a Cancer Focus NI retreat in Donegal. "That retreat changed everything. It was a weekend with other women who had been through breast cancer - just like me. We shared stories, tears, laughter. For the first time, I could talk openly without worrying I was putting a burden on my friends or family. "That's why I'm so passionate about the new Cancer Focus NI Therapeutic Cancer Support Centre in Enniskillen. It's a service I wish I'd had when I was going through treatment."
Washington Post
4 days ago
- General
- Washington Post
Asking Eric: Adult child sides with dad after ‘nasty' divorce
Dear Eric: I am a single, recent college graduate whose parents have just gone through a very nasty divorce. As much as I love them both, there is a 'bad guy' in the whole situation, and it is clearly my mother. She is a successful doctor and was always the primary breadwinner for our family, while my dad has been a stay-at-home dad. After my brother and I left for college, my mother carried on a series of extramarital affairs and ultimately left my father; she has now remarried to her latest fling. They are even attending the same church we went to from the time I was a child. I have gone to counselors who urge me not to pick sides and to maintain a good relationship with both of my parents, but it's kind of hard not to sympathize with my dad (who up to the date of the divorce said he was willing to forgive and forget, and take Mom back) over my mom, who just says she was unfulfilled and wanted a 'new soulmate.' I told my mom I wanted nothing to do with her at the time of the divorce, and up to this day have followed through on that. But I've gotten a lot of advice urging me to forgive her and try to move on in a positive direction. What do you advise? Am I wrong in this? I can't overstate how disappointed I am in my mother's choices which are completely at odds with everything she'd claimed to be, up until a few years ago. — Seeking Clarity Clarity: The emotions you're feeling about the divorce and your mother's actions are likely overwhelmingly complex. So, you have my empathy. You've accumulated a lot of advice, and I doubt I'm the last word. And I'm not going to contradict everything else you've heard. But I think that forgiveness is a step or two beyond where you are right now. It's important to remember that parents are human, that every marriage is unique and that every person has the capacity to give in to their worst instincts and that doesn't make them unworthy of love. And I'm not writing this to defend your mother; I'm referring to both of your parents. Try, if you can, to step away from choosing sides. Instead, see your relationship with each parent as unique. Each relationship has its injuries that need mending. With your mother, you're holding on to this disappointment over the dissolution of your family structure. That's a major injury. And I think you'll continue to feel the hurt of that injury for a long time unless you have a conversation with her wherein you talk about your hurt and give her the opportunity to make amends. It's hard to forgive when no apology has been offered. I don't think you can actually forgive her on behalf of your father. But by refocusing on what's wrong between the two of you, you may find a path forward. It doesn't have to be forgiveness. But I think that you can experience more peace. Dear Eric: I wanted to add to your response to 'Super Crush,' the married letter writer who developed a crush on someone who works at her local grocery. This is something that helped me tremendously when I felt the same thing 25 years ago, as a young wife and mother who totally was in love with her husband. At the time, I was completely shocked at myself and took no pleasure in my crush whatsoever. I didn't want it, I knew the person wasn't right for me, there was nothing that explained it. After researching it at the time, I found a book titled 'Anatomy of Love' by Helen Fisher. One of the things it explained was how a crush out of nowhere is a primal experience in our brain that is caused by the chemicals in one's brain, not because we have found our soulmate. This person's crush probably has nothing to do with the grocery employee, but everything to do with a rush of brain chemicals that happened to occur in their particular brain coincidentally at that moment and in that space. This helped calm me at the time and allowed me to continue meeting with him (a physical therapist) to get the medical care I needed. I was able to remind myself that this was just some overactive production of dopamine that meant nothing, and that I did not have to act on it. It was not easy, but after a few months the feeling went away. — Been There Been There: Dr. Fisher's book is a very interesting resource and, to your point, might calm the letter writer's nerves. Sometimes a crush is just a crush. (Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@ or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at 2025 Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
Washington Post
21-05-2025
- Business
- Washington Post
Asking Eric: Parent's questions keep offending adult daughter
Dear Eric: I am 80 and my daughter is 44. I am a retired professional and my daughter, a college graduate and business owner, gets offended when I question anything she does. She's considering going back to school to enhance her marketability and when she showed me a counseling program she was interested in, I noticed one of the required courses was statistics. When I asked her if she realized that it is a high-level math course, she became insulted. Her major in college was graphic design, and she always avoided math classes once she left high school.
CBS News
18-05-2025
- CBS News
Falmouth car crash kills high school senior just weeks before graduation
A high school senior was killed in a car crash late Saturday night in Falmouth, Massachusetts, authorities said. The 18-year-old driver was a student at Falmouth High School. Police have not yet named the victim. The single-car crash happened on Acapesket Road. Video from the scene showed a white Range Rover SUV with heavy front-end damage. It appeared to have struck a tree not far from the side of the road. Graduation is scheduled for June 7. "Our thoughts and prayers are with the family during this difficult time," Falmouth public schools Supt. Lori Duerr said in a statement along with police and fire officials. Counselors were at the high school Sunday afternoon, and more support will be offered at school on Monday for students and staff.
Daily Mail
17-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
JANA HOCKING: Are YOU brave enough to try the dirtiest taboo in marriage? It's saved thousands of relationships
You wouldn't think that New York's premier divorce attorney could also be in the running for America's top marriage counselor. But James Sexton has seen it all: the good, the bad and the unmitigated (she took the house, the kids and the dog) disasters.
