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The Frogalypse
The Frogalypse

Irish Times

time14-05-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Irish Times

The Frogalypse

Once upon a time in a super, super, super, secret laboratory in a bunker, Captain Smarty Pants and Bob the Frog were practising fighting. Bob the Frog was using laser eyes. Suddenly, they heard an eerie knock on the door. They opened it and there standing in front of Bob the Frog was himself. Bob was so stupid that he thought it was his brother. 'You don't have a brother Bob,' announced Captain Smarty Pants. The zombies were coming after Bob. Bob was from a polluted pond which gave him laser eyes and the gift of speech. READ MORE Once Imposter Bob got into the lab, he started destroying everything. Bob the Frog got hypnotised when he saw his doppelganger. Captain Smarty Pants looked at the calendar and was afraid of getting kicked out of college. He had missed the entire last week because he had been eaten by a giant piranha and he only just got out of it an hour ago. 'I can't afford to get involved in another mess,' he thought to himself. So he used super speed to quickly get to his college in Harvard but he fell into a hole along the way. He couldn't get out of the hole. Hypnotised Bob and the zombies were taking over Harvard. The zombies were woken up from the cemetery by demons. Impostor Bob demanded that they all go to Harvard because they had no braincells. When the zombies got to Harvard to take it over, it was in lockdown. Captain Smarty Pants tried and tried to get out of the hole but, it was just too deep ...

Doom: The Dark Ages review – id Software gets medieval in a dramatic rewrite of the shooter's rules
Doom: The Dark Ages review – id Software gets medieval in a dramatic rewrite of the shooter's rules

The Guardian

time09-05-2025

  • Entertainment
  • The Guardian

Doom: The Dark Ages review – id Software gets medieval in a dramatic rewrite of the shooter's rules

Billed as a prequel to id Software's 2016 revival of Doom, The Dark Ages is about as different as it could be from its predecessors while remaining recognisably part of the series. Where 2020's Doom Eternal was about speed and evasion, The Dark Ages emphasises standing your ground. Where Eternal involved picking off enemies one by one, The Dark Ages empowers you to obliterate dozens of demons simultaneously. Where Eternal saw you juggling rapid-fire weapons in a finger-cramping frenzy, The Dark Ages lets you solve most problems by hitting things ferociously hard. Ripping and tearing are out. Blunt force trauma is in. The kernel of The Dark Ages' combat stretches back to the 1993 original, inspired by the slow-moving projectiles fired by enemies such as imps, cacodemons, and hell knights. The Dark Ages empowers most of its enemies to shoot such projectiles, making its interdimensional battlefields glow with drifting fireballs, scudding orbs and floating energy barriers. You must navigate these obstacles as a slower, heavier Doom Slayer, one so physically dense he triggers a thunderclap when landing from a height. Indeed, it feels like he shouldn't need the shield which forms your primary defence against these projectiles. It can be used simply to block oncoming missiles, but certain attacks can also be deflected, returning them to sender. Successfully countering a projectile can stun its shooter, opening them up for a finishing 'glory kill'. While still bone-crunchingly vicious, these executions are generally less elaborate than in previous games, often (but not always) reduced to a straightforward punch or kick. Many demons attack hand-to-hand in patterns it's beneficial to memorise, while the largest and toughest foes are nearly all close-range duellists. These face-offs tend to take place within much larger battlefields, where smaller enemies prowl in their dozens and rows of undead shield-bearers guard their larger leaders. Id Software has devised several new weapons to deal with these infernal legions, such as a demon-impaling rail-spike launcher, or a gun that shreds enemies with the shrapnel of crushed skulls. It's a fascinating reformulation of the core ideas of Doom, and learning the rhythm of its shooting is as fun as witnessing its devastating effect. It is an easier riff to master than Eternal, however, while the slower pace and less stringent toolset mean that, at its highest level, it doesn't produce the same adrenaline rush. It doesn't help that the system is stretched over the flabbiest game id Software has made. The Dark Ages' 22 levels are all vast in scope, and many are open-ended, letting you pick your battles and unpick their secrets in whatever order you choose. Yet although the scale is impressive, the levels can be wearying to traverse, and it doesn't always feel as if the game makes the most of this real estate from a combat perspective. Id Software tries to counterbalance the slower pacing by mixing up how you explore. Some maps see you piloting an enormous mech called an Atlan, punching mountain-sized demons in slow-motion combat. Others involve flying around on the back of a dragon. There's novelty value here, but the game doesn't really know how to make either a meaningful experience. These parts are reminiscent of the obligatory vehicle sections that plagued shooters in the noughties, and the best I can say for them is they don't crop up too often. That said, I admire how much more experimental Doom: The Dark Ages is than it needed to be. Far from resting on its laurels, id Software seems possessed by a Nintendo-like urge to innovate. It wants Doom to be the shooter that rewires how you think about the genre with each new entry. The Dark Ages isn't as successful at doing so as id Software's earlier fare, but it is nonetheless a highly accomplished, smartly designed shooter that, at its best, hits like a truck. Doom: The Dark Ages is released on 15 May, £70

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