23-05-2025
Groom Lashes Out at Bride, Calls Her ‘Selfish' After She Wants to Cancel Wedding and Elope Instead
A bride on Reddit is canceling her "big" wedding to elope instead, so she can save money for medical school
The "upset" groom argues that the bride's unwillingness to compromise is "selfish" and said that his mother will be "very sad"
The majority of Reddit users commented that the bride should put her finances and education firstA bride is worried she might be in the wrong for canceling her wedding to elope instead.
In a post on Reddit's "Wedding" forum, the bride-to-be, 24, explained that when she got engaged she was initially "down to do a big wedding," however, her feelings immediately changed the following month when she was accepted into medical school.
"I realized [I would] rather shift my focus and the money I saved up to pay for med school and to lessen the financial burden of taking out loans," she wrote.
School begins this fall, and the bride is already worried about how much tuition costs. She figured that wedding planning and expenses would only make things worse, so eloping may be a more practical option for her and her fiancé.
"[I would] much rather now elope or even [have] a fancy elopement in Europe which is like $7K instead of spending the $40-70K on a wedding here now," the New York-based bride said. "So then that leftover money I can use on med school and FH's (future husband's) leftover money can go towards housing and other things."
The groom is not on the same page as the bride. He's "upset," especially because he knows that not having a traditional wedding would let his mom down.
"Elopement is not what his mom's dream for him is and that's gonna make her very sad," the Redditor remembered her fiancé telling her.
The groom's mom is only "willing to pay like 10%" of the wedding expenses.
"I just can't stomach using 90% of our money for the rest when I know in the long run I can use it on school," the bride shared in a comment.
Although the bride understands where her fiancé is coming from, she refuses to budge.
"I told him I get it but I don't want to give up a chance to be a DOCTOR just for a night to feed 200 people anymore," she rationed.
Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.
This isn't a good enough reason for the groom, who argues, "that's selfish."
The groom tried compromising by suggesting having "a small wedding," but it still isn't small enough for the bride.
"After he redid his numbers his definition of 'small' is 90 people just on his side… which is still gonna end up costing up in the ten thousands," the bride said.
She asked the forum: "I'm conflicted, am I crazy for this?"
In the comments section, the bride said that one option would be for her to "give up on med school altogether" because she already has a different career, but feels that wouldn't be "fair."
Most Reddit users advised the bride to put her finances and education first.
"Do not marry this man if he is willing to let you give up on med school to make his mom happy for one night. Plain and simple," one person commented. "You're young. There are literally billions of other men on the planet. I promise you, there is at least one who you will love and who wouldn't ask this of you."
"I have never met anyone who wished they'd spent more money on their wedding. Spend what you can afford," another Redditor agreed.
Some Redditors even suggested that the bride reevaluate her relationship.
"You really want to spend the rest of your life and be legally attached to someone who would sacrifice your career and spend your savings just to please his mother for one day?" an individual questioned. "Yeah I'd be rethinking this if I was you."
Read the original article on People
