logo
5 Millennial Dads on Juggling Parenting, Careers and Seeking Balance

5 Millennial Dads on Juggling Parenting, Careers and Seeking Balance

This story is available exclusively to Business Insider subscribers. Become an Insider and start reading now.
Millennial dads yearn to split parenting duties with their spouses and balance their jobs while still keeping their heads screwed on. However, the quest for 50/50 isn't always easy.
As Business Insider's Josie Cox wrote, millennial dads are trying to take a greater share of the responsibilities when it comes to parenting young kids. BI asked dads to weigh in on their experiences balancing childcare and work in an informal reader survey. In 48 hours, we received over two dozen responses from millennial dads across the country.
Many of the dads who replied said they were somewhat able to balance parenthood and their careers, with some weeks being tougher than others. A handful said they were drowning in responsibilities at work, home, or both, with a rarely balanced schedule.
Related video
Are you a dad trying to "have it all"? Business Insider is interested in hearing stories from fathers trying to balance parenting and their careers. Please fill out this quick form.
A 2016 Pew Research study found that dads were spending an average of eight hours a week on childcare, three times the amount of time spent in 1965.
Dads told us they wanted to change the perception of fathers and be more present at school events and recreational activities.
The flying trapeze act of parenting can be difficult. Here are some of the questions we asked and what the dads had to say.
What are your biggest challenges as a dad trying to "have it all"?
Nicholas Gilpin
Nicholas Gilpin
"Trying to 'have it all' as a dad today often feels like spinning plates. I want to support my family financially, nurture a business I believe in, and be fully present with my kids, but doing all three well at once is nearly impossible without burning out. The hardest part is managing the guilt that comes with constantly feeling like I'm not doing enough." — Nicholas Gilpin, 38, entrepreneur and stay-at-home dad of two in Fair Oaks, California.
Related stories
Business Insider tells the innovative stories you want to know
Business Insider tells the innovative stories you want to know
"It's a grind, and a balance, and a helping hand from our parents every once in a while. I don't have 'days off,' everything is just part of my life like fluid momentum. Sometimes there's turbulence and adjustments are needed (and grandparents), but that's just nature — fit it in when you can get it in." — Joshua Harville, 35, real estate agent and dad of one in Fort Worth, Texas.
Michael Schmutz
Michael Schmutz
"Being able to perform at a high level for my clients while also being involved in my kids' lives. I'm also a competitive bodybuilder, so I have to wake up early to train, have all my food prepped for the day, and then be ready to be a dad by 4 p.m. most days in order to stay involved with my kids and their activities." — Michael Schmutz, 39, marketing consultant, CEO, and dad of four in Salt Lake City.
"Making sure I get to all of my kids' events and appointments. This requires late nights and early mornings to make up the difference." — Jason Schilling, 41, head of assurance services at a CPA Firm and dad of two in Minneapolis.
"I put my career on hold to better balance time with my children. I was a teacher for close to 10 years before the demands of both became too much, and I chose to find a job that allowed me to focus on my children as opposed to my students." — Ben McChesney, 41, IT manager and dad of two, in Chicago.
What percentage of parenting responsibilities do you take care of vs. your partner?
"About 70—80% of the daily responsibilities, especially during the weekdays. My partner supports more in the evenings and on weekends when she's not working." — Gilpin
"I'd say around 35% (so far as she breastfed and gets up at night)." — Harville
"We split pretty evenly, I'd say I'm at 40%." — Schmutz
"100% on me when I have my kids." — Schilling, who splits custody time.
"I would say my wife and I split the responsibility between 65/35 and 55/45 in my wife's favor. I do a lot of the household chores, but she plans everything as well as keeping up with the finances." — McChesney
Do you feel like your employer gives you the flexibility to be the type of parent you want to be?
"I'm currently unemployed and building my own business, which gives me flexibility — but also means there's no formal support, no paid time off, and a constant tension between working on the business and taking care of the kids." — Gilpin, who spends around 60-70 hours a week with his kids.
Joshua Harville and his daughter at a listing
Joshua Harville
"My employer doesn't have a choice — I'm my employer." — Harville, who says he spends at least 54 hours a week with his little one.
"Since I'm self-employed, it's harder to balance. My clients can contact me at any time, and I have to be able to help them. Flexibility isn't an option right now." — Schmutz, who estimates he spends about 50-60 hours a week with his kids.
"I told my employer, 'hey, I'm a dad first, I want to make sure I can go to my kids' appointments and my kids' games.' I thankfully was the coach of my daughter's basketball team this season." — Schilling, who spends at least 25 hours with his 2 kids each week.
Ben McChesney
Ben McChesney
"Currently, yes, but when I worked as a public educator, it really felt like taking time away from work was frowned upon. This was doubly difficult for me because I tended to work in school districts in low socioeconomic areas in which my absence was difficult to accommodate due to limited qualified substitutes." — McChesney, who spends around 40-50 hours a week with his kids.
Orange background

Try Our AI Features

Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:

Comments

No comments yet...

Related Articles

Trump is losing support from men as approval rating drops below 50%
Trump is losing support from men as approval rating drops below 50%

Yahoo

time2 hours ago

  • Yahoo

Trump is losing support from men as approval rating drops below 50%

Men are cooling on Donald Trump after making up a significant chunk of the president's 2024 voting bloc. According to a new poll by CBS/YouGov, Trump's approval rating is tanking with men during his second term. It found that 47 percent of men approve of Trump's job, and 53 percent do not. Last October — just before Trump's second electoral victory — a similar CBS/YouGov poll found that 54 percent of men supported Trump and 64 percent said they thought he would be a strong leader. The drop overall reflects a broader disapproval with Trump's second term; DecisionDeskHQ's polling averages showed that the president's overall approval rating was down by about 12 points since January, a drop from 56 percent then to 44 percent this week. According to the new CBS/YouGov poll, 47 percent of men said Trump was focusing "too much" on deportations, while 33 percent said he was showing the "right amount" of focus. In another metric, 65 percent of men said Trump has not done enough to lower prices, and only 29 percent said they felt he had. On February 7, Trump had a 60 percent approval rating with men, but his numbers began to slip in the months that followed, according to the poll. By the end of the month, his favorability had dropped to 56 percent, and by April 11 — just a week after he unveiled his tariff plan — men's approval of the president fell to 49 percent. Trump won big with men in 2024. According to Pew Research, men favored Trump by 12 points in 2024. Men under 50 split their votes almost evenly between former Vice President Kamala Harris and Trump. In 2020, men under 50 backed former President Joe Biden over Trump by 10 points. According to the CBS/YouGov polling data, the big issues driving down Trump's approval with men are his performance on the economy, his seeming inability to curb inflation, and his intense focus on immigration issues. By mid-April, Trump's approval rating among men on the economy dropped to minus 10 points, his approval regarding inflation fell to minus 20, and his immigration approval — one of his strongest areas among men — dropped to just plus six points, The poll found that 49 percent of men believe that the economy is getting worse, and 65 percent said that Trump wasn't doing enough to lower prices for goods and services. Another 60 percent said they believe Trump is focusing too much on tariffs, and 57 percent believe his policies are directly increasing the cost of their groceries. They aren't wrong about their grocery bills; Consumer Price Index data shows that annual inflation rose by 2.7 percent in June, up from 2.4 percent in May. They're also not wrong about Trump's tariffs, according to Yale's Budget Lab. Americans are currently facing an average tariff rate of 18.7 percent, which is the highest it has been since 1933. The three key issues driving down Trump's approval rating were the major issues that attracted men to Trump in the first place, according to the poll. That could spell trouble for Republicans come the midterm elections if they do not adjust their focus and messaging before the election. Trump's dipping approval comes at a difficult time for him, as even some stalwart supporters among his voter base and within his party are questioning him over his handling of the alleged "Epstein client list." The president promised to be transparent about what the government knew of disgraced New York financier and child sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein — a man who had a long and well-documented friendship with Trump. After U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi told the public she had the so-called client list on her desk, the administration backtracked and insisted no such file existed, and confirming previous rulings that Epstein died by suicide in his New York jail cell while awaiting trial. Trump has reacted with dismissal and annoyance toward Republicans — and his own voters — who have asked him questions about his administration's position on the Epstein documents. Since then, Trump has faced questions and criticism from his voting base and within the conservative cultural sphere that helped sell his vision for America to the public — especially men.

Torn between Amsterdam and the US for grad school, she made a pros and cons list to guide her decision. Take a look.
Torn between Amsterdam and the US for grad school, she made a pros and cons list to guide her decision. Take a look.

Business Insider

time3 hours ago

  • Business Insider

Torn between Amsterdam and the US for grad school, she made a pros and cons list to guide her decision. Take a look.

When Royanne Ng got into Columbia University last year, she should have been elated. Instead, the nearly $80,000 first-year tuition and fees — not including housing — made her stomach turn. The Singaporean student turned the Ivy League program down and chose one across the Atlantic instead for a fraction of the cost. At Columbia, she was offered a spot in the Film and Media Studies MA with a concentration in emergent media — a track that explores formats like virtual and augmented reality. The 28-year-old is now pursuing a one-year master's in cultural data and AI at the University of Amsterdam, a program that blends machine learning with theory and tech policy. Ng also applied to NYU but wasn't accepted, and she ultimately dropped her application to the University of Edinburgh in the UK. Her postgrad degree had to be "very strategic," she told Business Insider — a move to boost her job prospects and reposition her career in Singapore. "If I'm going to spend this much of my financial savings on a degree, it has to be really, really worth it," she said. The US once had a near-monopoly on elite higher education. But as tuition rises, safety concerns grow, and political rhetoric turns hostile toward international students, the calculation is shifting. Here's how Ng made her choice. Please help BI improve our Business, Tech, and Innovation coverage by sharing a bit about your role — it will help us tailor content that matters most to people like you. Continue By providing this information, you agree that Business Insider may use this data to improve your site experience and for targeted advertising. By continuing you agree that you accept the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy . Prestige vs practicality Columbia's program offered big advantages: name recognition, accomplished alumni, and the implicit promise of career opportunities, Ng said. The brand name, she added, carried the common assumption that it gives students "a head start when it comes to job opportunities." But the costs were impossible to ignore. Columbia's program ran for two years and charged nearly $80,000 in tuition and fees just for its first-year students. In contrast, the University of Amsterdam's fees were about €17,000 for a one-year program. "The difference is just so stark," she said, especially when Columbia required a hefty deposit that felt like too much commitment. It wasn't just about money. She said many US courses were "more traditional" — rooted in legacy disciplines and slower to adapt. Europe had programs that were a lot more novel and flexible, often designed with interdisciplinary or future-facing themes, she added. Amsterdam's curriculum hit the mark. Ng said it aligned with her goal of transitioning from tech communications and a humanities background into a career that connects AI and policy — one she hopes to pursue in Singapore. Safety and geopolitical concerns Ng's family was also worried about her safety if she chose to study in New York — and so was she. For someone who had lived in Singapore her whole life — a country known for its low crime rates and political calm — she was concerned about gun violence, racial politics, and geopolitical uncertainty in the US. Still, she said the right school depends on the student's goals after graduation. Students hoping to stay and work in the US might prioritize a school's brand, alumni network, and credentials. But Ng plans to return to Singapore, so standing out in the local job market mattered more. Ng is set to finish her program in August. Here's her pros-and-cons list of US graduate schools: Ng had created a rough version at the end of 2023 while debating whether to choose the US for graduate school. When BI reached out to her in June, she pulled it together into a neat table: Pros Cons 1) Education quality Vibrant and mentally stimulating study environment, with motivated students and highly reputable professors. There's also an assumption that many top US schools have extremely good courses and teaching 1) Health and safety Worries among family members about safety of living in certain cities, with more risk due to geopolitical instability. Not sure if causing my loved ones to constantly worry would be a worthwhile trade-off for great education 2) Reputation and optics Excellent brand name, which would be helpful for future job securing and possible advancement 2) Financial costs Some schools I applied to cost about 5x more than graduate schools in Europe. Not sure if this cost difference can really be compensated by an equivalent degree of education quality. There were also a lot of miscellaneous fees involved just in applying to schools and securing spots when offered. 3) Solid alumni network Would be in connection with illustrious alumni network, which could also be helpful for career and job advancement 3) Local labour market incompatibility Given that I was looking at programmes within humanities and social sciences departments, I was also very conscious about whether certain courses would help me stand out or gain an edge in the Singapore job market. I had to consider the possibility that even excellent brand names might not be able to change the fact that many companies still look for science, tech and data roles. 4) Course material and programmes During my research of graduate schools, I observed that many US schools offered relatively traditional programmes, based on the write-up and descriptions of Masters courses. I did tend to see more exciting and novel courses offered in the UK and Europe, marketing interdisciplinary skills combining humanities/social sciences, data science or specific sector knowledge. I felt that this interdisciplinary angle was of particular interest as someone wanting to stay relevant in the job market, so this was a major consideration in choosing my graduate programme.

Tesla updates Robotaxi app users related to launch in California, BI reports
Tesla updates Robotaxi app users related to launch in California, BI reports

Business Insider

time6 hours ago

  • Business Insider

Tesla updates Robotaxi app users related to launch in California, BI reports

Tesla (TSLA) sent Robotaxi users new terms-of-service agreement related to its planned launch in the Bay Area, Grace Kay and Lloyd Lee of Business Insider reports. The update details how Tesla plans to launch if Robotaxi service under tighter state oversight. 'If your ride is taking place in California, it is being conducted with a safety driver using FSD (Supervised) pursuant to authority from the California Public Utilities Commission,' the agreement says, according to Business Insider. Elevate Your Investing Strategy: Take advantage of TipRanks Premium at 50% off! Unlock powerful investing tools, advanced data, and expert analyst insights to help you invest with confidence.

DOWNLOAD THE APP

Get Started Now: Download the App

Ready to dive into a world of global content with local flavor? Download Daily8 app today from your preferred app store and start exploring.
app-storeplay-store