Mothers open up about postnatal depression on new podcast

New Paper

11-05-2025

Soon after giving birth to her first child, Ms Bernadette Loh threw things around the flat and told her husband: "The next thing I'm going to throw is the baby."
Instead of happily cuddling her daughter, the homemaker found herself constantly frustrated as she struggled with postnatal depression.
Her condition improved with medication and therapy, and she is one of two mothers sharing their stories on a new podcast that was launched by mental health charity Clarity Singapore at the Institute of Mental Health (IMH) on April 28.
The Birth Of A Mother podcast consists of four episodes that have been released progressively in May, in conjunction with Mother's Day on May 11. Three episodes are already available on Clarity Singapore's YouTube channel, and the final episode will be released at the end of the month.
The podcast features Ms Loh, 31, who is eight months pregnant with her second child; another mother who wants to be known only as Audrey; and Dr Gillian Lim, chief of central region at IMH and a mother of four.
Clarity Singapore is a Catholic mental health charity that specialises in maternal well-being.
Ms Janice Quek, a clinical psychologist there, started the podcast after she realised that mothers who sought therapy lacked understanding about postnatal depression, which affects about one in 10 mothers in Singapore.
Clarity Singapore saw such cases rise by about 15 per cent in 2024 compared with 2022.
Ms Quek said many affected women feared they would harm their babies accidentally, but were told by family members that these thoughts meant they were incapable mothers.
The psychologist added that the taboo surrounding mental ill health in mothers, who are expected to love their newborns unconditionally, makes it harder to share their feelings openly.
Ms Quek said: "They often come to (therapy) and ask, 'I feel very alone. Is what I'm going through normal?'"
Ms Janice Quek, a clinical psychologist at Clarity Singapore, started the podcast as she realised mothers who sought therapy lacked understanding about postnatal depression. ST PHOTO: HESTER TAN
Dr Theresa Lee, a senior consultant psychiatrist on the board of Clarity Singapore, said many do not understand the tough transition to motherhood.
She said: "Pictures of a smiling mother staring into her baby's face portray motherhood as a blissful period. This may give women the impression that having a baby is a bed of roses. We need to adjust our expectations and acknowledge our struggles."
'Better off without me?'
Ms Bernadette Loh struggled with postnatal depression after the birth of her first child, but her condition improved with medication and therapy. ST PHOTO: HESTER TAN
Ms Loh, who was depressed in her teens, was angry and confused during that first pregnancy in 2021 as she had not planned to be a mother.
After her daughter was born, the former customer service specialist had trouble adjusting to her new role and handling the move to a new home.
Soon, Ms Loh wondered if the family would be better off without her.
Things worsened when they hired a domestic helper.
Ms Loh said: "I felt like, Oh, (the helper) is more present with my kid, she's going to call her 'mum'."
During her six months of postnatal depression, she had several breakdowns and even impulsively ran out of the home, prompting her husband to call the police.
She was admitted to IMH twice, and got better after taking her medication regularly and attending couples counselling with her husband.
Ms Loh decided to go on the podcast to let other mothers know they are not alone.
She said: "When people asked me about mental health when I first got diagnosed, I didn't want to share as it was my secret. But I realised a lot of things are very normal; it's just not talked about a lot."
Representatives of community partners such as hospitals and ground-up movement Mums for Life were present at the launch event.
Dr Lim, who leads the maternal mental health service at IMH, hopes the podcast can help mothers who are stressed but think they are not ill enough to seek assistance. "When you start your intervention early, it becomes something that's a lot more manageable," she said.
Peer support
Dr Gillian Lim, who leads the maternal mental health service at IMH, hopes the podcast can help mothers who do not think they are ill enough to seek help. ST PHOTO: HESTER TAN
She added that although the Government has been active in sharing information about postnatal depression, Singapore lacks peer support for parents.
Hearing relatable stories such as Ms Loh's can encourage parents greatly, she said.
"If someone is willing to talk about all the deepest insecurities and unglamorous side of being a mum, the mummy who watches that will say, 'Hey, actually that's like me,'" said Dr Lim.
Married couple Linus and Anne Marie Koh, who had their own brush with postnatal depression, offered to produce the podcast via their company Saint Max Media and absorbed 95 per cent of the costs.
Mrs Koh suffered from the condition after the birth of their fourth child. The couple, who have five children, discussed counselling and made childcare arrangements so that Mrs Koh could rest.
Mr Koh said they wanted to help young parents by supporting more dialogue on this topic. "It's important for more to know that it's not only okay to receive professional help, but sometimes it's crucial before things get regrettable."
Helplines
Mental well-being
Institute of Mental Health's Mental Health Helpline: 6389-2222 (24 hours)
Samaritans of Singapore: 1-767 (24 hours) / 9151-1767 (24-hour CareText via WhatsApp)
Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019
Silver Ribbon Singapore: 6386-1928
Tinkle Friend: 1800-274-4788
Chat, Centre of Excellence for Youth Mental Health: 6493-6500/1
Women's Helpline (Aware): 1800-777-5555 (weekdays, 10am to 6pm)
Counselling
Touchline (Counselling): 1800-377-2252
Touch Care Line (for caregivers): 6804-6555
Care Corner Counselling Centre: 6353-1180
Counselling and Care Centre: 6536-6366
We Care Community Services: 3165-8017
Clarity Singapore: 67577990
Online resources