What Father's Day Is Like When You've Lost Your Son

Yahoo

15 hours ago

On the first Father's Day since losing his 17-year-old son, Kenneth Collier Sr. said he plans to surround himself with family and love on what he knows will be a difficult day.
'Kenn's mom was murdered when he was 10, so after that I was raising him as a single dad,' Collier said about his son, Kenneth Collier Jr. 'We started to advocate against gun violence. We spoke together, we did a lot.'
'And then for it to happen to my son, you know it's hard, it's really hard to process, you know, but I'm dealing with it though.'
Kenn Jr. was shot and killed at an Austell apartment complex on Jan. 9, two months later a Cobb County grand jury indicted a 17-year-old and a 25-year-old on seven felony charges, including murder and aggravated assault.
In the weeks following, Collier founded Futures Without Fear to formalize the gun advocacy work that he began with his son. This Saturday, the group will host its summer kick-off rally in Adair Park with music, games, and activities for kids, and also to provide a space for necessary community conversations about gun violence.
'I'm pretty sure this weekend is gonna be a tough time for me, but one of the things that's been helping me with my healing is being around other kids and other people that look just like my son, so when I see them I can see my son,' Collier said.
Managing his grief while also being there for his fiancée, daughter, and stepson, who are also grieving, hasn't been an easy process.
'It's tough because I'm also trying to work through my feelings and my emotions,' he said. 'We've been doing the counseling as a family and just trying to hang together and spend more time together.'
Collier said he wants people to know what a special kid his son was and the impact he had during his short time on earth.
'Anybody that knew Kenn knew he was an outgoing, outspoken person. He loved to perform. He loved to speak on stages,' he said. 'After his mom was murdered on his 10th birthday, he was able to channel a lot of that anger and emotion in a different way that came out in his music and his writing,'
When he was 11, Kenn Jr. published a kids book called Button Buddy Stops Bullying And So Can You.
'He became a bully after his mom passed, getting upset at school, getting angry, getting in trouble, and he didn't know how to process those feelings. So he wrote a book.'
Sunday, he plans to spend time with his fiancée, daughter, and stepson as they all process the grief Kenn Jr's death caused.
For Jimmy Hill, he will spend his 13th Father's Day missing a child. In 2012, his 15-year-old son Curtis Jordan was murdered by two men who are now serving life in prison. Seven years later, his 21-year-old son Jimmy Atchison was shot and killed by an Atlanta police officer while unarmed.
'It's [going to] be difficult after the news I just got about the dismissal,' Hill told Capital B Atlanta in reference to the federal judge who dropped the murder, aggravated assault, involuntary manslaughter and violation of oath charges against the officer last week.
'I go by the graves of both my sons, Curtis and Jimmy, to put flowers down and spend time with my other children,' Hill said of his annual Father's Day routine. The Georgia NAACP has since started a petition to get Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis to appeal the judge's decision.
On Saturday, he plans to catch the end of the Juneteenth Parade at Piedmont Park, but otherwise Hill said he plans to have a chill Father's Day at home because he is using a wheelchair right now since breaking an ankle.
He also has nine other children — eight girls and one boy — ranging in age from 20 to 41. Raised by a single mother, Hill said he does his best to always be there for his kids, who all live nearby in Atlanta or Decatur.
'You know, I had to learn how to be a father. We can be dads and sometimes think money will take care of everything. But kids want time. Kids want your love, kids want to know you care. And that's what I had to learn how to do,' he said.
He credited his uncles, who helped raise him in the absence of his own father, with showing him how making time to go to games and events can sometimes be more important than money.
'That's what's going on with a lot of Black men today. We have to take the time out and learn how to be fathers. I don't care how old you get, there's always something to learn.'
The post What Father's Day Is Like When You've Lost Your Son appeared first on Capital B News - Atlanta.