Why this ‘cringe' Gen Z quirk has TikTok divided
Here's what to know about the Gen Z stare and the debate surrounding it.
What is the Gen Z stare?
First off, you're probably wondering, what is this Gen Z stare? Simply put, it's a blank, unfocused stare into the void, often found in the faces of Gen Z (also called zoomers)—the generation born between 1997 and 2012, wedged in between millennials and Generation Alpha.
It's most irritating for older people, namely millennials and their parents, who find it difficult to hold a conversation with members of Gen Z, instead being met with a blank, unfocused stare, often accompanied by silence or a one word answer.
Why are people debating over the Gen Z stare?
If the Gen Z stare seems like typical teenage behavior, you're not wrong; Gen Z certainly doesn't have a monopoly on being uncommunicative.
Now, TikTokers are debating not only whether the Gen Z stare exists and is a thing, but also, what it all means. Is it rude, or a justifiable reaction to what is being said?
In their defense, Gen Z social media users have said the stare is one of disbelief or frustration. It might be justified when, for example, in a customer service job, an older person can't figure out how to use the credit card machine, or just has trouble using basic technology—best summed up by TikToker _kayluhbb, whose post garnered 1.1 million likes and a number of replies, like this one: 'The gen Z stare is bc you're tired or repeating yourself.'
There are plenty of other TikTok posts demonstrating the stare, including this one, in which the user acts out a scenario in which she has to repeatedly tell a customer that a class is fully booked. Fair enough. But older generations used to just call this type of frustration being impatient, or mocking someone. Just sayin'.
However, not to be out-mocked, millennials are poking fun back at Gen Z, like in this post from a TikToker named Riley, who was met with a Gen Z stare as she attempts and fails to get her daughter golf lessons. Which is, at the very least, cringe.
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But in 2022, she saw people grow out their hair due to the Covid-19 lockdown conditions and she decided to let hers grow out as well. 'I feel so much better now that I let my gray hair grow out. My mom has now even started to let hers grow out, too,' Greenham says. 'I am happy with the decision of growing out my grays and I get a lot of compliments.' We spoke with five additional Latina women who shared their journey toward accepting their own gray hair, how they have overcome cultural norms, and how this decision has impacted their relationships with loved ones and themselves. Jacqueline Cordero, 34, California I was around 12 years old when I became aware of my grays. Middle school was really stressful, but my mom reassured me it was my Puerto Rican father's genetics. There weren't many, but they definitely stood out against my long dark hair. Students and even teachers pointed them out. As I grew older, they showed up more. While I was in high school, I was no stranger to a straightening iron and quickly learned my grays were unruly. I could never really control them. Then in my 20s, as I began a career and real adult life, I had a mix of my hereditary grays and my stress-induced grays. Society told me grays were a sign of stress and age and something worth hiding. My mother would always encourage me, saying they were gifts of wisdom. Still, she was influenced by U.S. beauty standards. Her face card has always been incredible, but societal pressures prevailed when it came to covering her grays. She allowed me to color my hair for fun, and even though covering her grays was a must, she never put that expectation on me for my grays. As I'm navigating my new identity in motherhood and my 30s, I've thought about covering them up in an attempt to look more youthful. I'm grateful for my Trinidadian and Puerto Rican genes for prolonging wrinkles and other signs of aging, but the grays have become their own entity within my hair. My grays symbolize my heritage, my family. They represent all the growth I've made in my life. They are a reminder that I'm right where I need to be and showing up how I need to. Anyuli Ramos Lopez, 33, Texas The first time I noticed I had gray hair was around senior year of college. I was 22. At first, I was embarrassed and in denial that I was graying early. I would pluck them out, dye my hair, or just style my hair differently to cover it up. Straight out of college, I started teaching in rural Texas and our salary was not one to be envied. I was paying rent, bills, and bought a new car. I would go to a salon to get my roots dyed every six-to-nine weeks because of how fast my hair grew out and the price each time was $90. I tried to box dye my hair to help with the cost, but that was damaging my hair. Around the summer of 2019, I decided to embrace it and grow out my grays. I went to a salon and dyed a part of my hair that grew out platinum blonde so that it could 'blend,' and when Covid-19 hit, I just let it grow out. Even to this day, my 83-year-old grandmother still dyes her hair to hide her grays. My grandfather on my paternal side had a head full of grays, so when mine started growing out, my father would call them brillos. He was proud that I had inherited this from his side of the family. I lost my father back in 2020 to the pandemic, and I feel as though my hair is a part of him that I can carry with me every day. I've come to truly love my grays. It symbolizes my individuality and how much I have grown in my own self-confidence. I'm not going to lie, I do smile and feel 'cool' when I get compliments from strangers. I love that I have used less chemicals on my hair, so my natural curls and waves have been able to come back. Kat Lovelis, 30, North Carolina I noticed my first gray strands at 15 years old. I immediately yanked them out because I didn't want to feel old. Growing up, I didn't really hear much about gray hair because my mom would always dye her hair. The ladies in my family would encourage me to cover mine up. I guess they didn't want to look old, and that pressure passed on to me, too. That sent an unspoken message that gray wasn't something to be shown. I grew up watching my dad have full gray hair, but he would cover it up, too. My mom always dyed her hair. No one really embraced it. I started going gray at 29 after I decided I no longer wanted to keep covering them up. At first, I didn't like them, but as they grew longer, I started to love the salt and pepper look. Now, my family loves my gray hair and it has inspired my mom and sister to let their gray hair grow out. To me, my gray hair symbolizes loving all of me, even the parts that used to make me feel insecure. It's a daily reminder to accept myself fully and not feel like I have to hide or change to be beautiful. I love that celebrities like Becky G and Salma Hayek are embracing their grays and encouraging others to do the same. Embracing my gray hair has helped me gain so much confidence. I used to feel embarrassed and try to hide them but now, I show them off proudly. They're part of who I am. Samantha Carranza, 32, Texas When I got my first couple of gray hairs at 28, I felt so confused. At 30, I noticed more grays coming in. I started to feel insecure when I realized I couldn't pull my hair back without the grays being noticeable. As a little girl, I noticed my grandmother always dying her hair to cover up her grays. I never heard her complaining about it, but my grandmother never exposed her grays in public. My mother now does the same. Looking back, I think witnessing my abuelita and my mami dye their grays had influenced me to want to do the same. I recently got my hair professionally done and instead of covering my grays up completely, like I have in the past, I decided to blend in my grays with a new hairstyle. I had every intention to get my hair done and cover up my grays, but Becky G's TikTok post really inspired me and made me feel less alone. I want to break the cycle by embracing my grays. It symbolizes strength and resilience. It reminds me of being a mother and of going through difficult seasons but still pushing through. I want to be able to inspire other women to love themselves completely. I have vivid memories as a little girl of when my great grandmother would visit from Mexico and I would brush her hair or run my fingers through her beautiful thick white hair. I want one day for my granddaughter to run her fingers through my hair. Dulce Maria Rodriguez, 32, Texas The first time I noticed I had gray hair I was around 17 years old. I would pluck them out of embarrassment. Around the age of 20, it started to get more noticeable and no one in my family embraced it. Funnily enough, even my dad covered his gray hair. I started dying my hair black or dark red with box dye at home because it's all I could afford. My parents didn't understand why I dyed it, even though they did the same thing. Growing up in a Latine household, I was told gray hair was caused by stress. But I never understood why I was getting gray hair so young if I wasn't feeling stressed. Looking back, I realize all of the pressure I was under as a kid and understand I had grown used to underlying stress for things such as always needing to translate for my parents and getting scolded for not understanding everything. Hearing, 'Entonces para qué vas a la escuela!' At 21, I took a more subtle approach to my gray hair. Instead of dying it one color, I incorporated highlights to blend with my grays. At first it was a style that was 'in,' but as time went on I started embracing it. Now, I feel like I have broken a cycle. Embracing my gray hair has been a journey. I am now 32 and I don't feel like I need to be embarrassed about my hair. I am lucky to be able to enhance it with the help from my hairstylist, but I feel empowered now. I wish younger me was as open about her struggles with gray hair as I am now, but I feel like it's just the way we as women are. My advice to younger generations is to be open about your feelings about getting gray hair. It's valid to feel insecure and the emotions have to be felt, but it's hair. Speak to your family members and believe them when they say it isn't a big deal because we are all headed to gray hair at some point, but a few of us get our sparkle sooner.
