Suzy Welch wants to help you live a more authentic life
Courtesy Suzy Welch
My favorite is
eudemonia
, for the principle of
self-care, recreation, and pleasure.
Welch, a
these 15 values after years of studying academic research, observing how people make choices, and paying attention to what stops them from living the life they want.
No value is good or bad, she says; they're only a problem when we don't acknowledge and live by the ones we care the most about.
'We come loaded with personal values in a certain ranking, and yet, 99.9 percent of us are not fully expressing the values we hold,' said Welch, 65, a Harvard Business School grad, known for her columns, 'Today' show appearances, books such as '
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She began working on 'Becoming You' — a method for figuring out what you're meant to do with yourself — in 2020, not long after the death of her husband
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She was grieving while trying to figure out what was next and what was important to her.
'I was trying to become me. It's the most meta story in the world. … I think this is why, when I see somebody have a 'Becoming You' breakthrough … it's so personal for me. It's like, 'Fellow traveler —
hi
.'
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Welch launched her 'Becoming You' methodology with MBA and
In May, she released a book, 'Becoming You: The Proven Method for Crafting Your Authentic Life and Career.' (She'll talk about the book with CEO of Boston Globe Media Linda Henry at the
Welch wants to reach as many people as possible with 'Becoming You,' which also has a
Later this month, she'll host her first
people like educators, life coaches, and financial planners, who can use the work with their own students and clients.
'People kept on saying to me … can I get certified in this?," Watch said. 'Finally we went to NYU and said, 'Can we set up a certification program? And NYU was wonderful and said 'sure.''
Suzy Welch's "Becoming You" at a local book event.
Aram Boghosian
'There's a whole section in the book about aptitudes and what you're good at. I think there's been a
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As Welch puts it, 'If you're going to live and support yourself, pay the mortgage, and all the other things, you've got to know what you're good at — and your economically viable interests."
There are obstacles, of course. Welch devotes a section of the book to 'The Four Horsemen of Values Destruction,' what she calls the roadblocks that stop us from staying true to what we want. More on that later, too.
Welch happened to be unfurling her 'Becoming You' classes as people came out of COVID lockdown, questioning why they made certain choices. They were introspective and ready to do some work.
As an advice columnist and relationship writer, I'm interested in how and where people find help, whether it's through therapy, books, counseling, coaching, or other avenues.
Suzy Welch lectures during her "Becoming You" seminar at New York University in June, 2024.
Vincent Tullo
After jumping into Welch's work, I did have, as Oprah might say, an
A month ago, I bought a bike. I'd realized, after a few vacations, that I enjoy biking on a safe and scenic path. The other day, I rode my brand new bike in great weather; I felt like I was 6 years old, with no cares in the world.
I was shocked at how free — and
myself
— I felt on this bike.
Later, I felt guilty. Who was I to be running around — on a Wednesday! — on this bike? How dare I not be working or helping my loved ones?
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Welch's book and method had an answer for that. After taking Welch's questionnaire, I learned a big, maybe simple thing: I value free time and fun activities more than I've ever admitted to myself. I would have guessed my one major value was 'workcentrism,' perhaps followed by what she calls 'familycentricism,' but the latter wasn't even in my top five.
Welch said people are often surprised by their results.
'They're staring into the face of something they've been denying or repressing. … The phrase I hear the most is, '
This explains everything
.''
During our interview, Welch told me I might have been lying to myself about prioritizing my family — perhaps in martyr-ish ways — without making me feel like a jerk. She is good at talking about uncomfortable things.
Her style, to me, is a mix of CEO, journalist, influencer, friend, or 'fancy aunt who does not put up with your nonsense.' She shares personal stories and moments when she admits she was a bad mom or scared about her life choices.
I attended two Welch events during her recent visit to Boston, including one at MIT, where she spoke to a mostly student audience, some of whom seemed very freaked out about their career prospects amid federal budget cuts.
Welch was quick to talk about her own mistakes. She quoted 'Moonstruck' and referenced 'The Iliad.' She spoke about waiting out fraught moments in economic and political history, and acknowledged that many people are in one, so they might as well be honest about what they want.
In the audience was Abby Witkin, a longtime Welch fan, who held a copy of '10-10-10,' Welch's guide to decision making.
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Witkin started reading Suzy Welch's columns about business and life in
'I was like, what a perfect thing to do for my birthday — go into a class where you're actually looking at the intersection of all of these [values], and you're trying to find your area of transcendence.'
Witkin said she always knew she really liked work
,
but the program helped her accept that it was OK to love it more than a lot of other things.
'[Suzy] doesn't call it workaholism. It doesn't have a negative connotation.'
I'm still diving into all of this, especially Welch's ideas about those Horsemen that stand in the way of us living our values (my issues are all about a fear of economic instability).
I know this is all very self-helpy, but in Welch's words, she wants us in an area of transcendence.
I get glimmers of it when I'm writing, and absolutely when I'm on that bike.
'Look, you can go through periods of your life where it completely ebbs away from you — because life happens. You get a divorce, you get fired. … But then, if you know this stuff about yourself, and you know what the picture of your authentic life is, you can fight another day,' she said. 'But those moments when you're living authentically — that is when you're very
exquisitely alive, that's your purpose
— and they're worth fighting for. It's worth doing."
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Meredith Goldstein writes the
and hosts the
. She writes about relationships. She can be reached at Meredith.Goldstein@Globe.com.
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Los Angeles Times
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- Los Angeles Times
Inside the final burst of Elvis Presley's creativity 48 years after his death
Two and a half years before he died, Elvis Presley sat on the floor of a walk-in closet at the Las Vegas Hilton and discussed a project that might have changed the course of his life. The meeting, as recounted by Presley's longtime friend Jerry Schilling, put the King of Rock and Roll face to face with Barbra Streisand, who'd come to see Presley perform at the Hilton in March 1975 then sought an audience after the show to float an idea: Would Presley be interested in appearing opposite Streisand in her remake of 'A Star Is Born'? At the time of the duo's conversation — Schilling says that he, Presley's pal Joe Esposito and Streisand's boyfriend Jon Peters squeezed into the closet with the stars in a search for some quiet amid the commotion backstage — it had been six years since Presley had last played a dramatic role onscreen; Streisand's pitch so tantalized him, according to Schilling, that they ended up talking for more than two hours about the movie. 'We even ordered in some food,' Schilling recalls. Presley, of course, didn't get the part famously played by Kris Kristofferson — a casualty, depending on who you ask, of Streisand's insistence on top billing or of the unreasonable financial demands of Presley's manager, Colonel Tom Parker. (In her 2023 memoir, Streisand wonders whether the character of a self-destructive musician was in the end 'a little too close to his own life' for Elvis' comfort.) Whatever the case, Schilling believes that the disappointment over 'A Star Is Born' set Presley on a path of poor decision-making that effectively tanked his career before his tragic death at age 42 on Aug. 16, 1977 — 48 years ago this weekend. 'That was the last time I saw the twinkle in my friend's eye,' Schilling, 83, says of the sit-down with Streisand. An intriguing new box set commemorates the King's final burst of creativity. Released this month in five-CD and two-LP editions, 'Sunset Boulevard' collects the music Presley recorded in Los Angeles between 1972 and 1975, including the fruit of one session held just days before the meeting about 'A Star Is Born.' These were the studio dates that yielded songs like 'Separate Ways,' which Elvis cut amid the crumbling of his marriage to Priscilla Presley, and 'Burning Love,' his last Top 10 pop hit, as well as 1975's 'Today' LP, an exemplary showcase of Presley's latter-day blend of rock, country and blue-eyed soul. Is yet another repackaging of Presley's music really something to get excited about? The Elvis industry has never not been alive and well over the half-century since he died; in just the last few years, we've seen Baz Luhrmann's splashy big-screen biopic, the latest book from the singer's biographer Peter Guralnick (this one about Parker) and not one but two documentaries about the so-called '68 comeback special that heralded Presley's return to live performance after nearly a decade of film work. More gloomily, 'Sunset Boulevard' arrives as Priscilla Presley — who got her own biopic from director Sofia Coppola in 2023 — is making headlines thanks to an ugly legal battle with two former business partners she brought on to aid in managing the Presley brand. (The feud itself follows the sudden death two years ago of Priscilla and Elvis' only child, Lisa Marie Presley.) Yet the new box offers an opportunity to ponder the curious position Elvis found himself in once the glow of the comeback special had faded: a rock and roll pioneer now strangely removed from the culture he did as much as anyone to invent. 'Sunset Boulevard's' title, which the set shares with Billy Wilder's iconic 1950 movie, can't help but evoke the spoiled grandeur of an aging showbiz legend. It also refers to the physical location of RCA Records' West Coast headquarters at 6363 Sunset Blvd., across the street from Hollywood's Cinerama Dome. Now the site of the L.A. Film School, the building is where the Rolling Stones recorded '(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction' and Jefferson Airplane made 'Surrealistic Pillow' — and where Presley set up in the early '70s after cutting most of his '60s movie soundtracks at Radio Recorders near the corner of Santa Monica Boulevard and La Brea Avenue. By 1972, rock had long since evolved beyond the crucial influence Elvis exerted at the beginning of his career. Nor was the King particularly dialed into what was happening in music while he was busy in Hollywood. 'We weren't as exposed as much as I wish we would've been to everything going on,' Schilling says on a recent afternoon at his home high in the hills above Sunset Plaza. A core member of Elvis' fabled Memphis Mafia, Schilling has lived here since 1974, when Elvis bought the place from the TV producer Rick Husky and gifted it to Schilling for his years of loyal friend-ployment. 'When you're doing movies, you're up at 7 in the morning and you're in makeup by 8,' Schilling continues. 'You work all day and you come home — you're not necessarily putting on the latest records.' More than the growling rock lothario of Presley's early days — to say nothing of the shaggy psychedelic searchers who emerged in his wake — what the RCA material emphasizes is how expressive a ballad singer Elvis had become in middle age. Schilling says the singer's romantic troubles drew him to slower, moodier songs like 'Separate Ways,' 'Always on My Mind' and Kristofferson's 'For the Good Times,' the last of which he delivers in a voice that seems to tremble with regret. (Presley had to be cajoled into singing the uptempo 'Burning Love,' according to Schilling, who notes with a laugh that 'when it became a hit, he loved it.') But in the deep soulfulness of this music you're also hearing the rapport between Presley and the members of his live band, with whom he recorded at RCA instead of using the session players who'd backed him in the '60s. Led by guitarist James Burton, the TCB Band — that's Taking Care of Business — was assembled ahead of Elvis' first engagement at Las Vegas' International Hotel, which later became the Las Vegas Hilton; indeed, one of 'Sunset Boulevard's' more fascinating features is the hours of rehearsal tape documenting Presley's preparation in L.A. for the Vegas shows that began in 1969. The sound quality is murky and the performances fairly wobbly, as in a take on 'You've Lost That Loving Feeling' where Elvis can't quite seem to decide on a key. Yet it's a thrill to listen in as the musicians find their groove — a kind of earthy, slow-rolling country-gospel R&B — in an array of far-flung tunes including 'You Don't Have to Say You Love Me,' 'Good Time Charlie's Got the Blues,' even the Pointer Sisters' 'Fairytale.' In one rehearsal recorded Aug. 16, 1974, Elvis cues his band to play the Ewan MacColl ballad made famous by Roberta Flack: ''The First Time Ever I Saw Your Friggin' Face,'' he calls out as we hear the players warming up. Then they all lock in for a closely harmonized rendition of the song so pretty there's something almost spooky about it. Sitting next to the balcony he was standing on when he got the phone call alerting him to the news of Presley's death, Schilling takes clear pleasure in spinning well-practiced yarns about his years with Elvis: the time John Lennon told him to tell Presley that he grew out his sideburns in an attempt to look like the King, for instance, or the audition where Elvis took a flier on a relatively unknown drummer named Ronnie Tutt who ended up powering the TCB Band. He's more halting when he talks about the end of his friend's life and about what he sees as the lack of a serious artistic challenge that might have sharpened Elvis' focus. Staying on in Vegas a bit too long, making so-so records in a home studio set up at Graceland — these weren't enough to buoy the man he calls a genius. Does Schilling know if Presley saw 'A Star Is Born' when it came out at the end of 1976? He considers the question for a good 10 seconds. 'I don't know,' he finally says. He started tour managing the Beach Boys that year and was spending less time with Presley. 'He never mentioned it to me. I wish I knew. There's probably nobody alive now who could say.'
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Destination: Oddsville. Here are five kid-friendly summer destinations you never thought of
The beach, the pool, the theme park, the water park, the campground. You can count the classic summer family activities on one hand. But what about the other hand? Where can you take the kids that they haven't been a million times? What activities don't involve swim trunks, wristbands, tick inspection, and the Garden State Parkway at 5 p.m. on a Sunday afternoon? Here are five less ordinary places to visit in New Jersey. Odd places. Interesting places. Places that, in some cases, are even a tiny bit sinister. A word that derives from the Latin term for left-handed. These are the places you can count on the other hand. Take them haunting Ghosts are like any other kind of tenant. There are good ones and bad ones. "Everything we have here is good," said Rebecca Gruber, tour manager of the Paranormal Museum in Asbury Park. "At most, there is mischievous energy. Nothing evil." So there's nothing for your children to be scared of. Nothing at all. True, Jerry Mahoney, the ventriloquist's dummy that occupies a niche in the upstairs rooms, has a habit of moving on his own. "We've found him on the floor," Gruber said. "The building is old, and it is kind of slanted. We're skeptics. Could he have just fallen off? Of course. But he gives people the creeps." And then there's the sofa, created in the 19th century by Thomas Day — a free man of color from North Carolina, who taught enslaved people the furniture trade, and then sent them out into the world as free, skilled craftsmen. It sings. "He would hear it singing when he laid down in it, and he took it as a sign of God telling him to keep doing what he was doing," Gruber said. "To this day, people hear singing." This, like most of the other 130 artifacts in the upstairs rooms (the downstairs houses the affiliated Paranomral Books & Curiosities bookstore), was donated. People, for some reason, seem more than willing to part with their haunted artifacts. You'll see demonic dolls, creepy-looking skulls, and death masks of Abraham Lincoln — along with a genuine lock of the 16th president's hair. "We talk about Lincoln's relationship to the paranormal, and how he and his wife practiced spritualism," Gruber said. "She would transate his dreams. They don't teach you that part in school." There is no individual admission to the museum: guided tours for up to 6 people are $120. But for a family of six, that comes out to $20 apiece — a whole lot cheaper than Six Flags. "I would say he museum itself is an ongoing investigation," Gruber said. "And everybody who comes upstairs becomes part of that investigation." A range of guided tours, geared to different interests, can be arranged through the museum: "Ghosts of the Boardwalk," "Spirits of Asbury Park," and so on. Advanced booking is recommended. 621 Cookman Ave, Asbury Park. paranormalbooksnj. Drive them buggy A city infested with insects? That might not be your idea of a tourist destination. But as your kids will discover — to their delight — Insectropolis, a Toms River attraction, has all the trappings of a real metropolis. It has high rises: terrariums, stacked up four high, each with its own tarantula. "Hello, my name is William" reads the label on one friendly resident. It has fine dining. "Larvets" BBQ worm larvae snacks and "Hotlix" scorpion suckers are just some of the taste treats available at the gift shop. It even has a crime problem. "Mass murderers" reads the sign above the enormous models of mosquitos, houseflies and other disease-carrying pests, each behind bars in its own prison cell. Luckily, there is also police. Beneficial, pest-eating insects are labeled "TOP C.O.P.S." ("Carnivores Of Pest Species"). Here, in this 7,200 feet of exhibit area, kids will also find a tank full of Madagascar hissing cockroaches, a working beehive, and exhibits on the evolution of termite control. Not to mention giant models of insect mandibles, and many cheerful facts about crustaceans. ("Think you've never eaten a bug? THINK AGAIN!") In short, there are more bugs here than in the Russian embassy. "There's a ridiculous number of insects here," said program coordinator Diane Redzinak. Her family runs Ozane Pest Control; 20 years ago, owner Chris Koerner opened this attraction as a way to give back to the insect community. Or at least, improve their public relations. "There are so many cool things about bugs, and nobody talks about them," Redzinak said. Some of them, like the tarantulas, even make good pets. Though she admits they might not be the best snugglers. "I'm a cat person," she said. $14 per visitor; kids 2 and under are free. 1761 Route 9, Toms River. Go off the beaten track A trip to Northlandz, in Flemington, is not just a visit to the Guinness world record holder for world's largest model train layout. It's a journey into one man's unique mind. The model trains that zigzag through the fantastic 52,000 square foot panorama, stretching over 16 rooms at multiple levels, are just one of the things that will intrigue your kids. There are also model planes. Battleships. Antique autos. Military uniforms. Several gigantic pipe organs. Several miniature toy pianos. Dolls and dollhouses galore. Spaceships from "Star Wars," and action figures from "The Wizard of Oz." But most of all, there is mystery. What do all those things have in common? Who built this extravaganza, and what were they thinking? That enigma is at the heart of the place — though one learns, via the signage, that Northlandz was the creation of Bruce Williams Zaccagnino in 1996, that his model train set had outgrown his house, that he was an organist as well as a model railroad enthusiast, and that the dolls weren't his. "The dolls are actually his wife's," said Jerry Jewels, who services all the engines, boxcars, and tenders that run along Northlandz's eight miles of track. "The detail and the sheer size of the place is what really gets people," Jewels said. "At first you're like, OK, it's just one room, and then there's another room, and another," he said. "And then you walk out into the canyons and it just blows your mind. It's almost like you become part of it." What he's talking about is the vast spaces, three stories high, where bridges criss-cross over ravines, and model trains at various scales (mostly H-O and G gauge) trundle past miniature villages, amusement parks, cities, strip mines, and "the world's largest toothpick farm." That's the kind of detail that makes you wonder what the founder was thinking. Also, the mysterious "grandma" who seems to be a recurring character in the Northlandz display. "The story goes that they were doing a strip mine and grandma didn't want to sell her house, so they built the strip mine around grandma's house," Jewels said. Along with the indoor displays, Northlandz also has a narrow-gauge railroad on the ground that kids can ride. Kids are, of course, who electric trains were originally intended for — though model railroading, these days, is usually thought of as a senior-citizen hobby. That may be changing — not least because of attractions like Northlandz. Perhaps, Jewels said, electric trains simply skipped a generation. "I have a bunch of friends who are into it, who are my age and younger," said Jewels, who is 30. "It's thrilling to see younger people who are into it. The hobby isn't dying." Northlandz is at 495 Route 202, Flemington. $32.50 for kids, $40 for adults, group packages and senior discounts available. Take them to the wizard's tower Wizards have towers. This was clearly established in "The Lord of the Rings" — though even J.R.R. Tolkien himself could never say whether the two towers in "The Two Towers" were Orthanc, Barad-dûr, or Minas Morgul. What's true of Middle Earth is also true of Middle Jersey. Our Wizard — the Wizard of Menlo Park — also has a tower. It can be found at the Thomas Edison Center at Menlo Park, located in — where else? — Edison. It's 131 feet high, and surmounted by a light bulb. Anyway, a representation of one. "Part of the tour is going to the base of the tower to see the eternal light," said Kathleen Carlucci, director of the center. "We try to keep it always lit. As long as we don't lose power." But the tower, dedicated in 1938, is not really the main attraction of the site (you can't climb it in any case). Though it is impressive. And it does commemorate the amazing work done on this spot from 1876 to 1887, when Thomas Alva Edison perfected the incandescent electric light, the phonograph, and dozens of other inventions that made his name. The real interest of this site is a small museum, only 800 square feet, that houses some of Edison's most marvelous gizmos. It's much smaller than the Thomas Edison National Historic Park in West Orange — the site of his latter-day house and factory. But the Menlo Park site (a non-profit) packs a lot into a little space. There are electric batteries, telegraph equipment, electric pens, generators, and of course, some of the earliest lightbulbs. There are five working phonographs — from the first tinfoil-cylinder models, to more sophisticated disc players that Carlucci or others will be happy to demonstrate for you. "Everyone's Home Except My Wife," Scott Joplin's "The Entertainer," and "I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Ice Cream" are some top discs on the Edison hit parade. If you're very well-behaved, they might even show you the little toy "limberjack" man who dances a little jig when you attach him to the phonograph spindle. "Of course he does the same dance no matter what's playing," Carlucci said. When you tire of all this, you and the family can take a stroll around the grounds — there are 36 acres of nature trails — and contemplate Edison's genius. "People come away with a better understanding of the incredible work and brilliance of Thomas Edison," Carlucci said. "His brilliance is that he doesn't just create one thing at a time. He has many irons on the fire. This is the birthplace of research and development." Thomas Edison Center at Menlo Park, 37 Christie Street, Edison. Public hours Thursday through Saturday, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. $5 for kids, $7 for adults. menlopark Have a picnic in the poles New Jersey — the Garden State — is famous for its crops. Tomatoes, blueberries, cranberries are to be found at any farmer's market. But have you seen where they grow telephone poles? Some 700 can be viewed, high as an elephant's eye, at Chester's Highland Ridge Park. They've been growing there since 1928, when AT&T set up the land as a testing ground. You might think there's nothing to being a telephone pole. Standing up straight is the full job description. But it is, as The Big Lebowski would say, an activity with a lot of ins and outs. The weather in the northeast is highly variable — freezing at times, broiling at others. Some kinds of wood, some kinds of chemical treatments, are more effective against the elements. AT&T was going to discover just which ones. By the 1980s, they'd had enough. They abandoned the site, which in 2004 it was incorporated into the town. You can visit them in their parkland setting and wonder. You can have a picnic in the poles. And when you're done, you can visit nearby Chester, a quaint old town full of stores with names like Comfortably Chic, Perfect Treasure, Better With Tyme, and Main Street Misfits Toys & Collectables. What better way to end a polar expedition? Highland Ridge Park, County Road 510, This article originally appeared on Have the summer doldrums? Here are five offbeat day trips. Solve the daily Crossword
Yahoo
a day ago
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Karol G to headline Chiefs-Rams halftime show in Brazil
Karol G to headline Chiefs-Rams halftime show in Brazil originally appeared on The Sporting News Karol G is heading to Brazil! The Latin singer will be the halftime performer for the Kansas City Chiefs and Los Angeles Rams game on September 5, which will take place at Corinthians Arena in São Paulo. The league is celebrating the 'Sounds of Latin America through Gameday Entertainment' for YouTube's first exclusive NFL live broadcast. 'I'm so excited to be part of YouTube's first-ever NFL live broadcast, it's truly an honor and a moment I'm so proud to be part of,' the Colombian artist, who's making the rounds with her Billboard No. 1 album Tropicoqueta, said in a press statement. 'I've watched many NFL halftime shows over the years, and now having this opportunity to bring my music to this global stage means the world to me. I can't wait to celebrate with everyone in São Paulo and fans all around the world.' In addition to Karol G's performance, Brazilian artist Ana Castela will perform the country's national anthem, 'Hino Nacional Brasileiro.' As for the U.S. national anthem, it will be performed by saxophonist Kamasi Washington. 'This broadcast is a landmark moment in our partnership with the NFL, where the worlds of football, music and creators will powerfully collide,' said Angela Courtin, VP of Sports and Entertainment Marketing at YouTube. 'From the real-life manifestation of our creator community in São Paulo to a global icon like Karol G taking the stage at halftime, this partnership with the NFL is a testament to our shared vision. It's about more than just a game; it's a statement that the future of live sports and entertainment is global and connected.' YouTube and the NFL have a multi-year agreement, which began in 2023 that grants YouTubeTV and YouTube Prime Channels exclusive rights to Sunday Ticket. MORE LIFESTYLE NEWS Ciara reveals what Kylie Kelce and her share dislike for Azzi Fudd reveals when she and Paige Bueckers realized they had 'chemistry' Venus Williams gets Barbie treatment with important message Shaquille O'Neal gets honest about painkiller addiction Mike Tyson sued over Jay-Z, DMX, Ja Rule song in Jake Paul fight promotion
