Ulrika Jonsson admits 'crippling anxiety, fears and self-loathing' led her to alcohol as she marks one year of sobriety
has opened up about her journey to sobriety in a powerful open letter, revealing that she has now been alcohol-free for over a year and it has transformed her life in ways she never imagined.
The TV presenter, 57, made the shocking admission that 'I can't do this any more,' was the life-saving message she sent to a friend on June 5 last year - a moment she now credits with rescuing her from the depths of addiction.
She wrote in The Sun: 'It was a hangover day, much like any other, really. I sat on the sofa with my liver and brain pickled in equal measure, wrapped up in the blanket of shame, and something made me reach out for help.'
The star, described herself as a 'binge drinker who drank to black out,' and detailed how her addiction crept in slowly.
Although she didn't drink daily, lose her job, children, or end up in prison or get arrested, the toll it took was significant.
From A-list scandals and red carpet mishaps to exclusive pictures and viral moments, subscribe to the DailyMail's new Showbiz newsletter to stay in the loop.
The TV presenter, 57, made the shocking admission that 'I can't do this any more,' was the life-saving message she sent to a friend on June 5 last year - a moment she now credits with rescuing her from the depths of addiction
Ulrika admitted to drinking for the wrong reasons - to numb her 'crippling anxiety, to escape, to disappear and extinguish my self-loathing'.
She also spoke openly about the shame and secrecy that surrounded her behaviour.
From drinking neat rum in a cupboard at 11am to waking up with no memory of the night before, she revealed that her drinking quickly spiralled out of control, but remained hidden behind a polished exterior.
Despite having a 'quite unremarkable' drinking history on paper, Ulrika revealed the emotional damage was profound.
'Alcoholics come in all shapes and sizes and many live among us in plain sight,' she wrote, adding that her family history made her vulnerable.
'I wasn't cut out for life,' she confessed, recalling how alcohol became her coping mechanism. 'I wanted the full anaesthetic effect… I just wanted the feelings to stop.'
Since giving up alcohol, Ulrika says she has learned more about herself in the past year than in the previous five decades and added how she has had a 'spiritual awakening' and found an 'inner peace'.
While family and friends have celebrated the milestone, with her daughter even offering to take her out for a meal, Ulrika admitted the lead-up to her one-year anniversary was filled with anxiety.
She now lives one day at a time and accepts that recovery is a lifelong journey.
It comes after Ulrika marked one year sober, sharing an emotional Instagram post about the milestone on Thursday.
The TV star shared before and after photos, captioned 'sober' and 'drunk' as she told her 204k followers that 'the journey goes on.'
'Today I'm marking 1yr of sobriety,' Ulrika wrote. 'No fanfare, no medal, no trophy. The journey goes on.
'A huge thanks to all those beautiful people who have supported me; understood me; scooped me up and handled me tenderly and without judgement; who nudged me in the right direction; who made me laugh and helped me shed the crippling shame.'
She paid tribute to her four children Cameron, 30, Bo, 25, Martha, 20, and Malcolm, 16, and apologised for the concern she has caused them over the years: 'Thank you to my kids for their support; for having faith in me after I must have worried them so.'
'For close friends for their patience and belief. My sobriety will continue to be my priority. Turns out it IS possible to teach old dogs new tricks.
Alongside the before and after snaps, Ulrika shared a childhood photo of herself as well a poignant reminder of 'this day last year'.
In December Ulrika marked her six months sober milestone, as she credited her loved ones for helping her get this far.
In her post, the former Gladiators star shared a picture of herself presently as well as an older snap of herself 'under the influence of alcohol', which she admitted that she previously 'couldn't bear' to look at.
'A huge thanks to all those beautiful people who have supported me; understood me; scooped me up and handled me tenderly and without judgement, she captioned the post
Alongside the before and after snaps, Ulrika shared a childhood photo of herself as well a poignant reminder of 'this day last year'
Detailing her road to sobriety, Ulrika penned: 'Today I am 6 months sober. On the 5th June 2024, I had the gift of desperation and reached out for help. I no longer recognised myself and I surrendered.
Referring to the image where she was 'drunk', Ulrika added: 'Pic. 2: is of me in the midst of the madness. Another drunk moment. At first I couldn't bear to look back at pictures of myself under the influence of alcohol. The cloak of shame was too heavy a burden.
'But now I look at those images and feel pity and sympathy for that girl - she desperately needed to be scooped up; held tightly and helped. Not shamed or judged. She was quite, quite broken and had no idea there was another way.'
Concluding her post, she shared: 'There is so much more to say - and I will say it in time. I'm still very much at the beginning of my journey but my life has changed in a beautiful way. It's a spiritual thing. One day at a time….
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
South Wales Guardian
28 minutes ago
- South Wales Guardian
EastEnders star suspended by BBC after disabled slur on Strictly set
A video emerged of the actor, who plays Jay Brown on the soap, using the term to describe the people of Blackpool, the town where the show was being filmed, The Sun on Sunday first reported. Borthwick is said to have made the offensive remark on a phone video while the Strictly cast were at Blackpool Tower Ballroom last November. A spokesperson for the BBC said: 'This language is entirely unacceptable and in no way reflects the values or standards we hold and expect at the BBC. 'We have robust processes in place for this.' Warren Kirwan, media manager at disability equality charity Scope, said: 'Attitudes and language like this are never acceptable. 'It's not just ignorant and hurtful to disabled people, it has wider consequences. 'Negative attitudes hold disabled people back in all areas of life, from getting a job to shopping on the high street. 'Mr Borthwick needs to reflect on what he said, educate himself and do better. 'We hope he takes the opportunity to get to know the reality of disabled people's lives.' Borthwick won the Strictly 2023 Christmas special with Nancy Xu, and won the best actor gong at the Inside Soap Awards in September that year, with the show recognised with the best storyline for Loving And Losing Lola, about character Lola Pearce-Brown's brain tumour diagnosis. As part of the storyline, Borthwick, as Lola's husband Jay, and Emma Barton, as Honey Mitchell, ran the London Marathon in character in honour of Lola after her death. His suspension comes after Wynne Evans last week said he had been dropped by the BBC, following an apology saying that he used 'inappropriate language' during the launch of the Strictly Come Dancing tour. The Welsh opera singer, 53, known for the insurance advertisements, will no longer be a BBC Radio Wales presenter, he announced on May 30. Earlier this year, he apologised for language that he called 'inappropriate and unacceptable' after The Mail On Sunday reported that Evans was heard making a remark to a woman in a video filmed during the Strictly launch event. It is understood he was given a warning over the remark by tour producers. In January, he said: 'I've agreed with the BBC that I'll take some time out from my radio show and the Strictly Live tour, as well as my other public commitments, to prioritise my wellbeing. 'I am deeply sorry for the pain my inappropriate actions have caused, and plan to take this time for self-reflection. 'Apologies to those I won't get to see at the remaining performances and I'm grateful to my fellow tour gang for all the amazing support they have given me.' The singer, who performed in the 25th anniversary of The Phantom Of The Opera and also won 2023's Celebrity MasterChef, told The Sun on Sunday earlier this month that the Strictly comment was not sexual or directed at one of the female cast but was a nickname for fellow contestant Borthwick. He told the paper: 'I didn't see the statement, Old Spit-roast Boy was a nickname for Jamie Borthwick. I'm not a bad guy, I'm not a misogynist, I'm not any of these things.' Evans added: 'And so I went, 'I'm so sorry'. And that was taken as a formal apology, so the press team issued a statement. I didn't see it. 'When I read the apology within the context of the story as it had been written, I was absolutely horrified.' The Strictly tour saw contestants of the most recent series return to the dancefloor, including Love Island star Tasha Ghouri, actress Sarah Hadland, JLS singer JB Gill, The X Factor winner Shayne Ward and Gladiators star Montell Douglas. They toured the country alongside Strictly judges Shirley Ballas, Anton Du Beke, Craig Revel Horwood and Motsi Mabuse, performing in cities including Birmingham, Sheffield, Newcastle, Liverpool, Leeds, Manchester and London.
The Sun
34 minutes ago
- The Sun
BGT star looks VERY different in racy new role 13 years after finding fame on show and splitting from partner
A POPULAR Britain's Got Talent star looks VERY different in her new racy new role. It has been 13-years since this performer found fame as part of a singing duo on BGT, and is now a West End star after splitting from her partner. 7 7 7 The star in question is Charlotte Jaconelli. The singer, now 29, was just 16 years old when she auditioned for Simon Cowell as one half of singing duo Jonathan and Charlotte, alongside her friend Jonathan Antoine. The singing pair won over the judges with their rendition of Andrea Bocelli and Celine Dion 's duet The Prayer in their audition, and made it to the finals. They eventually finished as runners up on the 2012 series, narrowly losing out on the win to Ashleigh Butler and her dog Pudsey. Charlotte said at the time: "Oh my God, we came second. It's incredible." Today, the performer looks a world away from her BGT days - and is now a megastar on London 's West End. In fact, she has revealed her next racy role which sees her transformed into a sex siren. Announcing her big news, Charlotte shared a VERY sexy snap of herself in costume, as she gets ready to star in Burlesque The Musical. The star shared some behind-the-scenes snaps, which included her in an eyepopping leotard which she almost spilling out of. Her sexy look was completed with a pair of black tights. Announcing her exciting news, Charlotte told her fans: "IT'S BURLESQUE! Meet Queenie - My theatre fairy god mother @todrick keeping me busy and singing notes as high as my heels. "See you at The Savoy this summer to bring the iconic @burlesquethemusicaluk to the main stage. "Hold your hats for the genius of @stevenantin & Miss Hall…it's gonna be FABULOUS." LIFE AFTER BGT After making a huge impression on BGT viewers, Jonathan and Charlotte, who first met when they were 11 years old at school, went on a UK arena tour. 7 7 7 The singing duo then recorded their first album, Together, in 2012 for Simon Cowell's label Syco. Their second album, Perhaps Love, was released a year later in October 2013. However, the pair went their separate ways in 2014 after they were both offered solo record deals by Sony Deals. But despite starting their journey together, Jonathan previously admitted that the duo were no longer as close. Asked by ITV's Lorraine if they were "still pals" in 2017, he admitted: "We don't really get to speak very often but that's the nature of it. "You don't really get the time to speak to your friends, my family comes everywhere with me and they're my longevity." BECOMING A WEST END STAR After going solo, Charlotte headed for the bright lights of the West End, and has since become a successful theatre star. She made her debut in 2018 as part of the original cast of The Boy in the Dress. Since then, Charlotte has appeared in Heathers: The Musical, and Sunset Boulevard alongside Nicole Scherzinger. Timeline of BGT Winners Britain's Got Talent has been thrilling fans since it burst onto the scene in 2007. Here we take a look at all the BGT winners - from the first ever one to the most recent: 2007: Paul Potts - The first ever winner of BGT was opera singer Paul Potts. He saw off competition from Connie Talbot, The Bar Wizards, Bessie Cursors, Damon Scott and Kombat Breakers to win. 2008: George Sampson - In series two of Britain's Got Talent a young George Sampson wowed judges and viewers with his impressive dance moves. 2009: Diversity - Dance troupe Diversity scooped the BGT crown and beat of competition from singer Susan Boyle, who was strongly tipped to win the show. 2010 - Spellbound: Gymnastic troupe Spellbound really impressed judge Simon Cowell with their stunning routines and incredible stunts in 2010. At the time, the music mogul said: 'I can only say on live television that was one of the most astonishing things I have ever seen.' 2011 - Jai McDowall: Viewers were stunned when Jai McDowall won the show in 2011, as young singer Ronan Parke was the favourite to win the series. 2012 - Ashleigh and Pudsy: Ashleigh Butler and her adorable pooch Pudsey stole hearts when they performed in series six of the talent show. 2013 - Attraction: Hungarian shadow artist group Attraction won the seventh series of Britain's Got Talent. The squad had taken part in the German version of BGT in 2012, however, they had only placed seventh. 2014 - Collabro: Classical music band Collabro faced tough competition in the 2014 final as all the finalist were singers, but they went on to scoop the crown. 2015 - Jules O'Dwyer & Matisse: Dog lovers everywhere could't get enough of Jules O'Dwyer and pet pup Matisse. The impressive duo even performed on a tightrope to secure their win. 2016 - Richard Jones: Army man Richard Jones became the first magician in the show's history to win Britain's Got Talent. 2017 - Tokio Myers: Pianist Tokio Myers impressed the judges with his blend of classical and electronic music. 2018 - Lost Voice Guy: Stand-up comedian Lost Voice Guy, who performs with a speech synthesiser, was diagnosed with cerebral palsy when he was six months old. However, he defied the odds and is a BGT champ. 2019 - Colin Thackery: Veteran army officer Colin Thackery warmed the nations hearts with his singing voice. He was crowned winner of BGT after singing Michael Ball's Love Changes Everything. 2020 - Jon Courtenay: Singer and pianist Jon Courtenay was Ant and Dec's Golden Buzzer act. After he won the £250,000 prize he said: ""Just amazing, I can't believe it." 2022 - Axel Blake: Comedian Axel Blake scooped the crown after the show was off air for two years during Covid. 2023 - Viggo Venn: Known for his high-vis jackets, comedian Viggo Venn was victorious in 2023. 2024 - Sydnie Christmas: The reigning champ is singer Sydnie Christmas.
Glasgow Times
44 minutes ago
- Glasgow Times
EastEnders star suspended by BBC after disabled slur on Strictly set
A video emerged of the actor, who plays Jay Brown on the soap, using the term to describe the people of Blackpool, the town where the show was being filmed, The Sun on Sunday first reported. Borthwick is said to have made the offensive remark on a phone video while the Strictly cast were at Blackpool Tower Ballroom last November. A spokesperson for the BBC said: 'This language is entirely unacceptable and in no way reflects the values or standards we hold and expect at the BBC. 'We have robust processes in place for this.' Warren Kirwan, media manager at disability equality charity Scope, said: 'Attitudes and language like this are never acceptable. 'It's not just ignorant and hurtful to disabled people, it has wider consequences. 'Negative attitudes hold disabled people back in all areas of life, from getting a job to shopping on the high street. 'Mr Borthwick needs to reflect on what he said, educate himself and do better. 'We hope he takes the opportunity to get to know the reality of disabled people's lives.' Borthwick won the Strictly 2023 Christmas special with Nancy Xu, and won the best actor gong at the Inside Soap Awards in September that year, with the show recognised with the best storyline for Loving And Losing Lola, about character Lola Pearce-Brown's brain tumour diagnosis. As part of the storyline, Borthwick, as Lola's husband Jay, and Emma Barton, as Honey Mitchell, ran the London Marathon in character in honour of Lola after her death. His suspension comes after Wynne Evans last week said he had been dropped by the BBC, following an apology saying that he used 'inappropriate language' during the launch of the Strictly Come Dancing tour. The Welsh opera singer, 53, known for the insurance advertisements, will no longer be a BBC Radio Wales presenter, he announced on May 30. Earlier this year, he apologised for language that he called 'inappropriate and unacceptable' after The Mail On Sunday reported that Evans was heard making a remark to a woman in a video filmed during the Strictly launch event. It is understood he was given a warning over the remark by tour producers. Wynne Evans and Katya Jones during the Strictly Come Dancing – The Live Tour launch at Utilita Arena, Birmingham, in January (Jacob King/PA) In January, he said: 'I've agreed with the BBC that I'll take some time out from my radio show and the Strictly Live tour, as well as my other public commitments, to prioritise my wellbeing. 'I am deeply sorry for the pain my inappropriate actions have caused, and plan to take this time for self-reflection. 'Apologies to those I won't get to see at the remaining performances and I'm grateful to my fellow tour gang for all the amazing support they have given me.' The singer, who performed in the 25th anniversary of The Phantom Of The Opera and also won 2023's Celebrity MasterChef, told The Sun on Sunday earlier this month that the Strictly comment was not sexual or directed at one of the female cast but was a nickname for fellow contestant Borthwick. He told the paper: 'I didn't see the statement, Old Spit-roast Boy was a nickname for Jamie Borthwick. I'm not a bad guy, I'm not a misogynist, I'm not any of these things.' Evans added: 'And so I went, 'I'm so sorry'. And that was taken as a formal apology, so the press team issued a statement. I didn't see it. 'When I read the apology within the context of the story as it had been written, I was absolutely horrified.' The Strictly tour saw contestants of the most recent series return to the dancefloor, including Love Island star Tasha Ghouri, actress Sarah Hadland, JLS singer JB Gill, The X Factor winner Shayne Ward and Gladiators star Montell Douglas. They toured the country alongside Strictly judges Shirley Ballas, Anton Du Beke, Craig Revel Horwood and Motsi Mabuse, performing in cities including Birmingham, Sheffield, Newcastle, Liverpool, Leeds, Manchester and London.
