Prince Harry and Meghan's 'huge strain' after 'losing everything'
Seven years after Prince Harry and Meghan Markle tied the knot, royal biographer Tom Bower reveals how he thinks the 'turmoil' surrounding them has put pressure on the Sussexes' marriage
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle made the front pages all around the world with their kiss on the steps of St George's Chapel after being pronounced husband and wife. The romantic, picture-perfect moment was seen as the start of another joyous royal union – attracting the same levels of public adoration as Prince William and Kate Middleton before them.
But, seven years on, royal biographer Tom Bower says the reality is proving to be very different. The ex-BBC journalist, who is midway through his second book on the couple, sums up the time since May 19, 2018 as an 'unpredictable, tumultuous rollercoaster'. Tom says: 'When the nation, and the world, saw them at St George's Chapel, they thought, 'This is bliss'. It was seen as a most wonderful image, something terrific for the royal family and terrific for Britain.'
He goes on: 'Harry has always been besotted by Meghan, and of course they are now both devoted to their children.'
Harry, 40, and Meghan, 43, had announced their engagement around six months earlier, after a romantic proposal with a custom three-stone ring – made using diamonds owned by the Prince's late mother, Princess Diana.
The wedding came just a few weeks after another joyous royal occasion, the birth of William and Kate's third child, Prince Louis. Even as the day approached, however, the couple found themselves embroiled in some rather unpleasant family dramas.
Meghan's father, Thomas Markle Sr, admitted he had lied to his future son-in-law over claims h e had staged paparazzi photos in exchange for payment a few weeks before the ceremony.
While there is no doubt the pair were, and still are, very much in love, ex- investigative journalist Tom believes the writing was already on the wall for the direction their marriage would take.
He claims: 'The guest list showed where it was all going. It was full of Hollywood stars, and Meghan's family weren't there. Everything that was clear on that day has transpired – there has been a break-up of a family, and a move back to Hollywood.'
The couple welcomed their first son, Prince Archie, on May 6, 2019, while they were very much working royals and relations with William and Kate were seemingly good.
The couple congratulated Harry and Meghan on the birth with a funny message saying: 'Welcome to the sleep deprivation club.'
Just a year later, it all changed. Harry and Meghan announced they were stepping back as senior members of the royal family to work to become independent, 'while continuing to fully support Her Majesty The Queen'.
It was explained that they would split their time between the UK and North America. Tom says: 'In the beginning, Harry found it terrific and Meghan clearly loved it.
'It was a great adventure. He had amazing freedom in the sunshine, paddling in the Pacific, embracing fatherhood and everything. So I think that at this stage, it was going well. But then their reality changed. The issue of their ties with the UK and Harry's family became apparent, and Harry found that very, very difficult.'
The couple sat down with US presenter Oprah Winfrey to share their experiences in 2021. And Tom says the money they made from Harry's explosive memoir, Spare, and their Spotify and Netflix deals, has no doubt given them huge financial security.
But it comes at a cost – the most significant being Harry's relationship with his brother and father.
Add to that his recent High Court case over his security while in the UK, and his comments about the King no longer speaking to him, and they are essentially in a marriage surrounded by intense turmoil, Tom warns. He claims: 'It's been an unpredictable, tumultuous rollercoaster, which is not what they expected.
'Harry's lost relationships with his family in England, and I think he is now a very lonely prince. But what is brilliant about them is they conceal the turmoil that they go through, such as with the court case on security in London. Harry is troubled, but Meghan can't help with that in any way. She doesn't want to be involved in Harry's battle with his family.
'She's focused on their life in California with the children and building her brand. Everything that's happened since their wedding has put a huge strain on them – but Meghan's a consummate performer and knows how to ignore criticism and present herself looking immaculate and smiling.'
Now that things are hopefully settling down they will, no doubt, be hoping for a smoother next seven years of marriage. Harry's priority, reckons Tom, should be on enjoying his time with Meghan, six-year-old Archie and daughter Lilibet, three – and finding his purpose.
What that might be, he says, is impossible to predict – insisting: 'I've never for a moment thought they would end their marriage.
'Instinctively, I think the marriage is sound because they have a lot in common and clearly have endless intensive conversations about their fate, which binds them.
'The marriage was ideal because he wanted to be saved, he needed help. Meghan is a sort of mother and lover, and that was what he needed. They both want to be loved, and they both love their children.
'They have a big enough house to have their own space from each other, and Harry will go off and do his things – for example attending an event in New York without her – and vice versa. They don't feel that they have to be together all the time.'
They have weathered a great many storms together in their first seven years of marriage.
If history is to be an indicator of their future together, Harry and Meghan may face more bumps in the road – but they will do so united, for better or for worse.
Tom adds: 'I'd be hugely surprised if she didn't stay loyal to Harry – it would be completely contrary to everything we've seen of her. It's impossible to predict exactly what the future holds. Other than Harry writing another book or Meghan writing about her experiences, they need to find their purpose.
"The real problem for them is what does Harry do? He's 40, hasn't an official role and he has lots of enemies. Not being close to his family leaves a hole – his focus must be on filling that in California, with Meghan.'
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