Starmer's expressionless face finally serves him well

Telegraph

28-07-2025

Sir Keir Starmer 's expressionless face may have led to unfavourable comparisons with robots, but it served him well in the Donald J Trump ballroom.
While the US president held court for an hour and 10 minutes – fielding questions on everything from the suffering in Gaza and US interest rates to the dead paedophile Jeffrey Epstein – the Prime Minister kept his eyes dead ahead, like a passer-by trying to avoid eye contact with someone talking to themself.
He encountered a president in top form after two days of golf at one of his favourite courses, and 24 hours after unveiling a trade deal with the EU worth trillions of dollars in investment.
After small talk on the steps of Turnberry with Sir Keir and his wife Victoria – who Mr Trump described as 'very respected – about Aisla Craig, the island in the distance, discussions soon turned to Russia and Palestinian statehood.
The president went on to say: 'I don't know what he's [Sir Keir] doing but she's very respected, as respected as him. I don't want to say more, I'll get myself in trouble. But she's very, she's a great woman and is very highly respected.'
Perhaps tellingly, Lady Starmer did not join the Prime Minister and Mr Trump later on an Air Force One flight to Aberdeen.
What was meant to be a quick photo-op became an impromptu press conference, despite the best efforts of a bagpiper almost drowning out journalists' questions.
It may have been Scottish soil, but there was no doubt who was the host.
Inside the ballroom, it was the same. Sir Keir was invisible for minutes at a time, a prop at his own bilateral meeting.
'He poached people that worked for me,' said Mr Trump, as he was lured by an American reporter into discussing his falling out with Epstein 20 years ago. 'I said, 'Don't ever do that again.' He did it again. And I threw him out of the place.'
Sir Keir pressed his hands together, brushed lint from his sleeves, crossed and uncrossed his legs as Mr Trump held forth.
To one side, Sophie Nazemi, his director of communications, kept her eyes fixed on the Prime Minister, as if monitoring for a distress signal.
The room was vast – eight huge chandeliers at least – but the chairs at its centre had been positioned to evoke the intimacy of the Oval Office. It meant there was nowhere for Sir Keir to hide.
He and Mr Trump sat at the heads of their teams, who were lined up in chairs set out in the space where the White House sofas would be. It made the US president the host, and Sir Keir the dutiful guest.
'Thank you so much for showing us around and having this opportunity to sit in this fantastic ballroom, which is absolutely incredible,' he said.
Somehow, Sir Keir and Mr Trump have developed a warm working relationship. But occasionally it sounded as if the president rather wished that there was a different person in the seat next to him.
'Nigel, as you know, is a friend of mine,' he said as he discussed Nigel Farage 's demand that the president be allowed to address Parliament during his September state visit.
'Keir is a friend of mine,' he added, in the nick of time.
It was a chance for the Prime Minister to jump in, and dispel any notion of the US president turning Parliament into a set for the Trump show.
'Parliament's in recess at the time,' he said, before using words like 'unprecedented', 'sophisticated', and 'historic' to describe Mr Trump's second visit of the year.
Sir Keir's poker face became a thousand-yard stare as the minutes ticked by. Was anyone going to end this press conference?
He found moments of relief along the way, pivoting quickly from a tricky question about whether the Open should return to Turnberry, to answer an earlier question about the Lionesses' European Championship victory in Basel on Sunday.
'The mental and physical resilience that they showed was quite incredible,' he said, no doubt comparing it with his own capacity for resilience. 'So there's a lot of bunting out today or tomorrow to celebrate them bringing that cup home.'
Relief came in the end not from the president but from one of the junior White House staffers. 'That's it,' she shouted. 'Everyone out.'
Mr Trump was still answering a question on whether the UK needed its own 'Alligator Alcatraz' immigrant camp, while Sir Keir could breathe a sigh of relief.
Sir Keir still had the rest of the evening to go – a trip on Air Force One, then Marine One to Aberdeenshire and Mr Trump's second golf course.
Later, the two leaders emerged from the presidential helicopter at Mr Trump's country hotel on his Menie Estate. The president's adult sons, wives and partners had made the trip, but there was no sign of Lady Starmer.