
Mental health best practices: Building safe places in a chaotic culture
During my nearly 18 years as a professional counselor, I have frequently seen the impact that societal change can have on the mental and emotional health of individuals. The onset of COVID-19 and the isolation and increased social media use led to a massive increase in polarization of viewpoints. This has led to increased interpersonal problems in almost every venue of our culture. We have few cultural outlets currently that are not plagued with the polarization of our current politics and values. As one comedian put it 'the new Civil War is running straight through Grandma's kitchen.' These concerns have also contributed significantly to individual anxiety and depression. In some cases the impact of isolation and prolonged exposure to negative messaging has led people to more intense psychological problems such as dissociative symptoms and even psychosis.
As a long-time practitioner of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a widely used and highly effective psychotherapy, I have seen the life-changing benefits that a change in skills and habits can bring to individuals and families. One of the critical treatment components that makes DBT highly successful is that it contains practical skills which are widely applicable to challenging situations of varying intensity. These skills have been adapted to be taught effectively outside of a clinical setting. At CPC, we teach many of these skills through our outreach effort, Memphis Resilience Project, which seeks to provide mental health resources to under-served neighborhoods.
Safe places for yourself
Recently I stopped into a coffee shop on my way to work because I had a few minutes of free time prior to seeing my first patient. Usually I see this kind of activity as a personal treat, but as I was waiting to receive my order, I was dismayed to hear a loud and intense political discussion taking place. I had also just left a medical appointment where also my medical professional was venting about political issues. The concerns for our society hit me hard that day.
I feel blessed and grateful to God that I have learned DBT skills across the years so that I can continue to manage myself around these situations and find Joy in life. I'd like to offer a few ideas on how you can build DBT skills into your life to help you manage well the challenging cultural norms we find ourselves in.
DBT was built to be very practical and memorable, so below you will see several acronyms you could try to memorize and apply to your challenging circumstances:
If you're feeling anxious or overwhelmed, consider practicing the 'IMPROVE' skill:
Imagery: Imagine a very relaxing scene and your anxious or hurtful emotions draining out of you.
Meaning: Find purpose or meaning in a painful situation. Focus on whatever positive aspects of a painful situation you can find.
Prayer: Open your heart to a supreme being, God, or your own wise mind. Turn things over to God or a higher being. Ask for strength to bear the pain or anxiety.
Relaxing actions: Breathe deeply. Massage your neck and scalp. Practice yoga or other stretching.
One thing in the moment: Find a pleasant task, such as eating one of your favorite foods, or rubbing your pet, and focus your entire attention on just what you are doing. Describe the entire sensory experience to yourself.
A brief vacation: Give yourself permission for a mini vacation: a 10-minute walk in a garden, read a magazine, visit a museum or the zoo.
Self-encouragement and re-think the situation: Tell yourself: 'I will be okay. This won't last forever. I will make it out of this.'
Safe places with others
DBT is built around the concept of dialectics, moving away from 'either-or' thinking and toward 'both-and' thinking. This view is based on the assumption that no human being has the patent on absolute truth, and different opinions can be valid, even if you do not agree with them. Guidelines for dialectical thinking include:
Avoid extreme words: 'always,' 'never,' 'you make me.'
Practice looking at all sides of a situation and all points of view.
Use 'I feel' statements instead of 'You are…' or 'You should…'
Check your assumptions. Don't assume that you know what others are thinking.
Do not expect that others know what you are thinking. Learn to express yourself in a non-threatening manner.
If you have a family or friend group (like most) with varying opinions and some members who can be vocal and have a difficult time considering other points of view, consider practicing the 'GIVE' skill to build and maintain positive relationships:
(Be) Gentle: Be kind and respectful. Don't attack, use threats, or cast judgments. Be aware of your tone of voice.
(Act) Interested: Listen and act interested in what the other person is saying. Don't interrupt or talk over them. Ask clarifying questions to make sure you are understanding what they mean. Maintain good eye contact.
Validate: Show that you understand the other person's feelings or opinions. Be non-judgmental out loud. Validating does not mean agreeing.
(Use an) Easy manner: Smile. Use humor. Use non-threatening body language. Leave your attitude at the door.
Please know that you are regularly absorbing negativity, even when you are not aware of it. You will want to be intentional to detox yourself. DBT Skills are a tremendous aide to help anyone in working to build a meaningful life that is not endlessly driven by anger, anxiety and hurt related to current events.
Being aware of your own emotions and learning techniques for managing them can go a long way toward promoting personal happiness and maintaining positive relationships. In addition, learning these sorts of skills can enable you to navigate life's challenges and ultimately thrive in whatever situation you find yourself.
Those interested in finding out more about The Memphis Resilience Project, or financially supporting its efforts can visit the CPC website: www.cpcmemphis.net/memphis-resilience-project.
The Christian Psychological Center (CPC) is a 47-year-old nonprofit. Its mission is to provide hope and direction to those experiencing life difficulties in a manner that reflects God's love and grace. For more information, contact Erin Reynolds: ereynolds@cpcmemphis.net.
Jon Tinniswood has served as a clinical staff member at Christian Psychological Center since 2019. Prior to joining CPC, Tinniswood worked at several intensive treatment centers here in the Mid-South from 2013-2019. Tinniswood started his career in Oregon and completed graduate school and his early clinical career in Denver Colorado. He has a wide range of personal and therapy-related experiences across a 22-year career in Mental Health. In addition to LPC licensure, Tinniswood also is a Linehan Certified DBT clinician and state of Tennessee approved supervisor.
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