'My life was incomplete without them': Emirati women open up about fostering children

The National

03-04-2025

Aysha Albusmait is a single mum raising her two daughters Reem, 15, and Hussa, 9. Reem was only three-years-old, and Hussa just 40 days, when she became their mother. As an Emirati foster mother, Ms Albusmait told The National there needs to be more awareness about what's involved with fostering children in the UAE, from starting the process to providing emotional support for foster parents. When asked why she decided to foster children, Ms Albusmait takes a deep breath. 'I think the question to ask is why I didn't foster them earlier. My life was incomplete without them. It was like a missing puzzle piece in my life,' she said. 'Today, my life is complete with Reem and Hussa. When you walk into my house, it is full of love and laughter. Their toys are strewn around, their books – the house is alive because of them.' But she says there is also heartache that comes with being a foster mother. 'Nothing breaks my heart more than when I'm asked why the girls don't look like me," she said. 'Sometimes I say, 'they look like their father' or, 'not all kids look like their parents'.' Ms Albusmait, who is a doctor of political science, has also established a community support group bringing foster parents together from across the Arab world. The platform aims to correct misconceptions and provide information on fostering. Even so, she said it's important that more foster parents come forward to share their stories. 'They're always afraid of society. For me, I want to talk about it because I know it will affect other people's lives and encourage others to foster," she said. "There are many children out there who need a family and a safe home. This won't just affect the child's life – it will affect society." She also spoke candidly on whether being foster children could lead to her daughters being bullied. 'When I asked my girls if they tell their friends they're fostered, their response was: 'This is the truth. Why should we hide it? Why should we be ashamed of it?'," she said. 'In all religions – and in Islam – fostering is permissible and encouraged for the betterment of society,' she says. 'But in Islam, adoption is not allowed, simply to avoid the mixing of lineages and bloodlines.' She was also advocating for the creation of a dedicated non-profit organisation to support foster children, not financially, but emotionally. 'These children don't just need a roof over their heads. They need stability, love, connection, and long-term emotional support,' she says. 'We need a system that can support them beyond the home.' Foster parents, she added, should be given the same rights as biological parents, including being entitled to parental leave. Narjes Al Blooshi knows exactly what that kind of support foster parents need. She became a mother to Aisha when the girl was just two-months-old. Today, Aisha is seven – and couldn't be happier. 'The day I got Aisha was the most wonderful day of my life. I felt like a mother coming home from the hospital with her newborn baby,' she said, adding that she even breastfed Aisha for a few months. 'She's my baby – and she even looks like me,' she said proudly, adding that she reminds her daughter almost every day that she is beautiful and special. 'She's the most beautiful girl in the world. And if anyone asks her if she's fostered, I've told her to say that she's special. "That's exactly what Aisha did. On adoption day at her school, she stood up on stage and spoke about her journey – as a beautiful and special child – a gift from God. My daughter is beautiful, and it's not her who should be proud. I'm the one who's proud and blessed to be her mother,' added Ms Blooshi. While adoption is not permitted in Islam, the UAE's law on the rights of children states that "a child who is deprived of his or her natural family, has the right to an alternative care through a foster family, or a public or private social welfare institution, if a foster family is not available". While adoption typically establishes a legal parent-child relationship, fostering is a more limited and revocable arrangement, a legal expert explained. 'A foster child can be removed from the family under certain circumstances outlined by law. Adoption, however, does not grant authorities the same ability to terminate the relationship because it is considered a permanent parental bond, much like that between biological parents and their children,' said Diana Hamade, founder of UAE-based legal firm Attorneys at Law. Ms Albusmait was eager to convey the joy of being a foster parent so other families would know what this journey really means. 'I'd really like parents to know that anyone who fosters a kid feels like their life has changed. It's truly a blessing. Us foster parents can all confirm that. Our lives changed for the better after we fostered children," she said. 'Don't listen to anyone who advises you not to foster. Fostering is for everyone with a good and sincere heart,' she says. 'For me, it was like my life was in black and white – and now it's in colour. We need people to understand what fostering really is and what it's not. It's not charity. It's love. It's a commitment. And it changes lives – not just the children's, but yours too.'