23 Former Inmates Share What Prison Is Actually Like

Buzz Feed

2 days ago

A while back, people from the BuzzFeed Community and on Reddit revealed what it's actually like to be incarcerated based on their experience (or the experience of others they know) — and their responses range from shocking to utterly heartbreaking. Here are some of the most eye-opening ones:
"The guards can decide an inmate can't have something whenever they feel like it. Even though it's something they've been getting and having all the time. I would bring my mother things I know for a fact she was allowed to have because I read the list a million times over. But after standing in line forever, you get to the window and give them the stuff. They will give back the things she suddenly isn't allowed to have, but could, like, a week before. All because they feel like it and would take whatever they wanted."
"I was told more than once that they would open what I gave her and take things. They took brand new no-name sneakers I got for her because I guess they wanted them more. I would get her a replacement pair, and they would take those, too. I got her a third pair, and she finally got them because it was a different guard."—pullhandlesupnotout
"Jail sucks. I wouldn't have survived if my husband hadn't sent me books every few days. I was in jail for six months, and books were the only thing we had. I had read hundreds of books by the time I left. I had stacks in my cell from floor to ceiling, and I would rent them out to the women in my pod for things they made, like Jolly Rancher wrapper picture frames, drawings, soap sculptures, ramen, etc. When I left, I gave the women all my books, and you would have thought I gave them each $5,000 or something."
"My ex was in Rikers a few times and also upstate. Phone calls and commissary are expensive because the companies the prison contracts with are price-gougers. Inmates are often transferred to another prison without notice, and the guards toss everything in their cell when they do — letters, photos, etc. You completely lose your agency in there. When inmates leave, they don't know how to run their own lives. It's a shame because most people serving time get out and have to live in society with us. You'd think we'd want them prepared to take on life's challenges so they don't offend again. But in America, prison is not rehabilitative; it's punitive."
"Your word is everything. Breaking your word puts you roughly on par with a sex offender. You give your word on something, it needs to be gospel. Someone gives you theirs, assume it is too — and be ready to go if it isn't."
"Everything is for sale, or at least has a market value. Don't do anything for free unless it's for someone you know."
"Sustained eye contact means you're starting something. Someone makes it with you, assume they're sizing you up."
"Current prisoner here in the Philippines. Anything can be smuggled in if you pay the right guards — even sex workers. Money is power."
"There are people to avoid, and if you have a decent celly (cellmate), they'll point them out, somewhat like Shawshank."
"Keep to yourself, and don't stand out in any way. This also means don't be the 'funny' guy who makes everyone laugh. You want to be as invisible as possible, really."
"Not being able to leave is incredibly frustrating and nearly impossible to put out of your mind. The entire time, part of your mind is raging at your captivity."
"People gamble a lot. Sometimes you will enter a unit, and people gamble on everything. You wanna play chess? You need to gamble to play. Dominoes? Gamble to play. Basketball? Gamble."
"The guards just sat and watched YouTube all day and night. Seems like a dream job if you've got no soul."
"Not a longtimer here, but show everyone respect. If you bump into someone, it's critical to say, 'I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention.'"
"For me, the loss of everything outside of my body was the biggest shock. You don't have anything they don't want you to have when you first go in, so in a way, it's like being born into a new world, but fully aware."
"I was a female inmate in a state prison. Anyway, I know there's a huge difference between men's and women's jails, and a huge difference between jail and prison. But one thing that no one tells you is that it's going to be so boring. So endlessly boring."
"Wear slippers in the shower, and shower every day. Not doing one of those gets you beat up here in California."
"Summer vacations. A friend of mine was recently locked up during summer months. Because guards take vacation the same time as everyone else, three days a week were spent on lockdown — meaning that one to two hours of outside time didn't apply because of staff shortage."
"A friend of mine did some time. He had internet and PlayStation, and a chef made breakfast and dinner every day. They had to make lunch themselves with access to a full complimentary kitchen. Knives, cutlery, and so on were freely available."
"No one tells you how hungry you're gonna be. The food sucks — and not just sucks; it's absolutely not fit for human consumption. But you get hungry enough to eat it. They only serve 1,200 calories a day in women's prison (at least mine did)."
"A lot of people were uneducated. No idea about geography, history, science, or anything. This led to me being a tutor in there for people taking the GED."
"It's WAY louder than you think it would be. There are always people who never seem to sleep."
—[deleted user]
"There is a store there, and you can get anything you want. The way a store works is that one or two people in the unit have every possible commissary item you can get."
And finally...
"Try not to talk about your time or open up about how you are feeling about it. There's always somebody who is going to do way more time than you and doesn't want to hear it."
Have you (or someone you know) ever been in prison? What was the surprising thing about your experience? If you feel comfortable sharing your story, you can use the comments or this anonymous form below.