Mother's diagnosis spurs Stythe into advocacy

Otago Daily Times

06-06-2025

Carys Stythe signs autographs for Southern Steel fans in Invercargill last weekend. PHOTO: MICHAEL BRADLEY PHOTOGRAPHY
Carys Stythe was in her happy place.
It was her second fully contracted season with the Northern Mystics last year and the rangy defender was starting to stamp her mark and come into her own.
There were plenty of highs from the season, as the Mystics went on to be crowned back-to-back ANZ Premiership champions and Stythe got the callup for the Silver Ferns development squad.
Then, in the middle of the season, she got the news.
Her mother Sara, who had just celebrated her 50th birthday, had been diagnosed with stage four bowel cancer.
It was an unimaginable new reality for the 21-year-old and her family.
After having a sore stomach, her mother, who Stythe described as "very in tune" with her body, knew something was not right and went to see her doctor.
But she had to fight for further testing to eventually get the diagnosis.
"She had to push for herself to get a colonoscopy because they said 'you're too young to have anything in your bowel', which is terrible because lots of people are getting diagnosed young," Stythe said.
"If someone sent Mum to go get a colonoscopy regularly, she would've been able to get it — but now she's got stage four cancer.
"It's just the difference between A and B, I guess.
"That's the one thing that we can urge people to do... Just test it."
Stythe openly admits last year was really tough.
"I don't even remember half of it. I was so upset the whole time.
"Obviously I didn't show it on court because that was like my space away from what was going on at home."
But her tight-knit family of father Gareth, older sister Imogen, 23 — who moved to London this week, which her mother encouraged — and younger sister Isla, 16, banded together to support one another.
Her younger sister is autistic, and has relied heavily on their mother, so the family had the added pressure of helping her become more independent.
Stythe is proud of how far she has come.
Distance has never been a problem either, since Stythe landed in Invercargill with the Southern Steel this season.
She made the trip to visit her loved ones when the Steel played in Hamilton earlier this season and their family chat was always ticking over with countless messages.
"I literally talk to them on the phone every day.
"We've still got that family connection and I'm only a flight away if she needs me.
The Stythe family (from left) Isla, Imogen, Sara, Gareth and Carys. PHOTO: CARMEN BIRD
"We're super close. I think that's what made it really hard as well."
If there is anything Stythe wants people to take away, it is the importance of family.
"Just soak up the time with your family. It's hard, but it does get easier."
Looking to make the best of the situation, Stythe has continued to put one foot in front of the other.
Her family gathered together to run the Auckland half marathon last year, all for a great cause, and raised $10,000 for Bowel Cancer New Zealand.
It is a moment that still brings a smile to Stythe's face.
Her work did not stop there.
Stythe was an ambassador for the Move Your Butt campaign in February, designed to get people raising money by completing 100km to honour the 100 Kiwis who die of bowel cancer every month.
The defender spent the month running, and walking, to help raise awareness for a cause that has become close to her heart.
And it is not hard to see why she has become so passionate about it.
"If regular colonoscopies were a thing from a young age, she wouldn't have stage four cancer right now.
"She would've had it cured. It would've not even been a thing.
"The fact she had to push to get one... she'll push for that, whereas I think other people wouldn't.
"It just wouldn't have happened, so just really raising awareness for how young people can actually get it and[they're getting it] younger."
More than 3300 New Zealanders are diagnosed with bowel cancer every year, a statistic no-one should have to live with, she says.
Stythe continues to share information through her social media, including the group who protested outside Parliament, calling for lowering the age of eligibility for free bowel screening tests to 45 last month.
"I'm just trying to get it out there, I guess.
"Anyone that can hear it and take something from it, I guess, is what I want."
Stythe has settled in well to life in the deep South.
Living in Invercargill with her partner Hikoi Paki, and being part of a fresh Steel side that clicked from the moment they met made for an easy transition.
"I'm just really loving my time here.
"All the girls we're really good friends and the coaches are great.
"I just think because I'm enjoying my time so much here it's showing on court."
Stythe in action for the Steel against the Pulse in their ANZ Premiership game in Invercargill. PHOTO: MICHAEL BRADLEY PHOTOGRAPHY
That is for certain. Stythe has been outstanding and leads the ANZ Premiership for rebounds (11), and deflections (22) and is fourth-equal for intercepts (seven).
Stythe, who was the New Zealand secondary school player of the year in 2021, put it down to the Steel's environment, and more game time at goal keep allowing her to focus on her job.
Learning from Steel coach Wendy Frew, and her family-first mentality, also allowed Stythe to settle in her role.
"She's all about the person first and I think obviously with Mum, she's been really awesome about that," Stythe said.
Adding in the two-point shot had added another layer to the game, and while most of the discussions have been related around the shooters, many forget there are defenders trying to stop it.
Stythe says it turned the circle backwards — instead of trying to push shooters out of the circle, defenders wanted them closer to the post during the two-point time — and the rules made it hard to get around their opponents.
But Stythe sees potential in the innovation.
"It makes it fun. I know the fans love it so much.
"I love it so much as well. When I'm down the other side and we get a two in, it just lifts the whole team."
The Steel were hammered 70-45 by the Central Pulse last week.
But it was a bad result in an otherwise positive start to the season and they get another shot when they host the Mainland Tactix this afternoon.
The Steel lost 57-50 to the Tactix in the opening game, but the Tactix only really ran away in the final quarter.
"We just need to bring it from the first whistle.
"We could take away lots of good things from our first game against them, kind of keep doing that but see what we could do better so we can take the win."
It will be a memorable game for many reasons.
The Hutton Family Trophy will be on the line again, in honour of Kelly Hutton, who died of ovarian cancer, and her sister, Megan, who played for the Steel.
In a nice touch, the Steel will also be doing their bit raising money for the Southern Cancer Society.
And when Stythe runs out on to the court, there will be some lucky people in the stands watching on — her family, including her mother, who have made the trip to Invercargill to watch her play.
"They're my biggest fans so I'm really excited to see them."
ANZ Premiership
4pm, Invercargill
Southern Steel: Aliyah Dunn, Georgia Heffernan, Summer Temu, Serina Daunakamakama, Kimiora Poi, Renee Savai'inaea, Carys Stythe, Abby Lawson, Khayne'-Lii Munro-Nonoa.
Mainland Tactix: Ellie Bird, Te Paea Selby-Rickit, Martina Salmon, Erikana Pederson, Holly Mather, Parris Petera, Paris Lokotui, Karin Burger, Jane Watson, Charli Fidler.
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