When Saas-Bahus Talk Periods: A New Chapter In Menstrual Conversations

News18

29-07-2025

Despite menstruation being a normal biological process, its experience is often shaped by the environment and cultural beliefs around it
They've long been the keepers of family recipes, decision-makers for festivals, and the guardians of traditions. In Indian households, the saas (mother-in-law) has traditionally been the upholder of inherited wisdom from what is cooked to what is considered taboo. But what if she also helped reframe how the household treats menstruation?
While roughly 355 million people in India menstruate, the subject remains deeply stigmatized, shrouded in silence and accompanied by various restrictions. It presents a cultural paradox: a process so universal and natural is also considered unspeakable. In fact, nearly 70% report facing some form of familial or societal limitation during their periods, whether it's being barred from entering the kitchen, cooking, participating in auspicious family celebrations, or storing menstrual absorbents.
While girls may grow up learning 'modern' concepts in school, these ideas often lack permanence. Whether shaped by modernity or taboo before marriage, many women tend to unlearn them afterward, adapting instead to the customs and values practiced in their husband's home. Research shows that while girls often turn to their mothers for advice on menstrual health, married women are more likely to seek guidance from their mothers-in-law or husbands. In fact, when facing health issues during their period, nearly 40% of adult women consult their mother, mother-in-law, or significant other.
Family hierarchies and dynamics heavily influence how women seek health advice. This affects everything from daily household activities and mobility to even their choice of menstrual absorbents. Hundreds of conversations and ethnographic studies conducted by Tata Trusts across tribal and rural communities in India from Gujarat, Jharkhand, and Uttar Pradesh uncovered insights that trace these taboos and their ripple effects on a woman's life.
A Jharkhand-based mother-in-law offered a telling perspective that reflects rural India's layered approach to menstruation: even when it is viewed positively, it's often seen through the lens of fertility. She said, 'Acha cheez hain. Woh nahin hoga toh sansaar chalenga kaise. Bacha kaise hoga? Usse hum kharaab kaise mane?" (It's a good thing. Without it, how would the world go on? How would children be born? Why should we see it as something bad?). This mindset, passed down over generations, continues to shape societal attitudes.
But what if the saas often a gatekeeper of social norms replaces inherited beliefs and says, 'Yeh sirf sehat ka ek lakshan hai" (this is only an indicator of health)? One sentence can open up a world of possibilities. A mother-in-law's influence can determine whether harmful traditions persist or if positive change can take root. With her support, the entire narrative can shift.
A New Era for the Saas
On the ground, engaging with mothers-in-law particularly through social and behaviour change communication campaigns can drive meaningful change. Divyang Waghela, Head – Water, Sanitation and Hygiene, Tata Trusts, said, 'When mothers-in-law, who often set the tone at home, lead with empathy and understanding, they help create safe spaces where younger women feel comfortable discussing their menstrual health without shame. This may involve sharing their own experiences, acting as confidants, or offering practical support—such as guiding younger women in their families to seek medical advice, encouraging their sons to be considerate husbands, ensuring their daughters-in-law eat nutritious green vegetables, and promoting rest. Such active dialogue can be truly life-changing."
Meaningful saas-bahu conversations also open the door to timely medical care and offer women greater dignity and agency over their bodies and daily lives. These shifts have the potential to create ripple effects, challenging and transforming long-standing community norms.
Despite menstruation being a normal biological process, its experience is often shaped by the environment and cultural beliefs around it. When families begin to see it as a crucial health marker rather than a symbol of fertility or impurity they are more likely to address a woman's real needs during this time. The evolving role of mothers-in-law as allies, and the generational shift in attitudes they represent, offer hope. The transition from gatekeeper to advocate of care replaces stigma with dignity, and silence with support.
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