Five words that today are gratingly misapplied or worn out
— The Beach Boys, 1966
'When we Americans are done with the English language,' wrote Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936), 'it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.' Let's survey some recent damage.
The fifth-most misused word in what remains of the tattered language is 'massive.' It is an adjective applied to anything big, even if the thing has no mass. There cannot be a massive increase in consumer confidence. Similarly, it would be wrong to say there is massive illiteracy in many uses of 'massive.'
The fourth-most shopworn word is 'unique.' It is applied to any development that has happened since the person misusing 'unique' was in high school. As in, 'There is unique polarization in America today,' a judgment that cannot survive even a cursory reading about the 1850s. Often the misuse is compounded by tacking 'very' onto it. Saying that something is 'very unique' is saying that something merely unique is less so than something 'very unique,' with uniqueness varying by degrees.
The third-most gratingly misapplied word is 'only,' but only in the phrase 'one of the only.' As in, Mickey Mantle is one of the only switch hitters in the Hall of Fame. One of the only is a wordy way of avoiding 'few.'
The second-most worn-out word in contemporary discourse is 'iconic.' This adjective is, it seems, applicable to anything or anyone well-known in a way different from the way anything or anyone else has become well-known. New Jersey urges tourists to come and enjoy its 'iconic boardwalks.' Hulk Hogan, a professional wrestler, was, a story on his death said, iconic. Meaning he was somewhat famous and somewhat distinguishable from other professional wrestlers, every one of whom strains to be very unique.
Today's most promiscuously used word is 'vibe.' It probably is used so often by so many because trying to decipher its meaning is like trying to nail applesauce to smoke. Having no fixed meaning, 'vibe' cannot be used incorrectly. So, it resembles the phrase 'social justice,' which includes a noun and a modifier that does not intelligibly modify the noun.
From the American Enterprise Institute: 'Zohran Mamdani Won the Vibe War.' Vibes at war? Supporters of the New York mayoral candidate like 'the idea of mood.' City Journal on 'Mamdani's Vibes Campaign': The candidate 'didn't just run a campaign; he curated an experience,' blending 'culture and politics into a lifestyle brand' featuring 'aspirational consumption,' whatever that is. Roll Call, which covers Capitol Hill: 'Vibe Shift in House.' Some members of Congress were changing their votes.
The Wall Street Journal: 'Luxury Brands Are Hit by a Vibe Shift.' Wealthy shoppers are skimping. Maybe. The Financial Times: 'Unapologetic brands lean into the vibe shift.' No more 'quiet luxury,' more 'maximalism, conspicuous consumption, opulence.' The New York Times: 'Can Walmart Drop Its Discount Vibe?' National Review on 'The Land Where the Vibe Doesn't Shift,' a.k.a. Ireland, which has mostly missed 'the vibe shift' of a conservative backlash against progressive overreaching.
A Times obituary of a photographer: 'Marcia Resnick, Who Captured 1970s New York Vibe, Dies at 74.' A Times columnist asks: 'Should You Be Able to Copyright a Vibe?' ('Should stealing someone's vibe be against the law?') The Wall Street Journal: ''Vibe Coding' Arrives for Businesses.' This has something — the story is murky — to do with artificial intelligence.
Shakespeare used 28,827 different words without resorting to 'vibe.' He could have written that Lear gave off a bad vibe while raging on the heath, and that Falstaff's vibe was fun. But the Bard did as well as he could with the limited resources of the Elizabethan English he had.
Modernity means being constantly blindsided by progress. Most Americans sailed through grade school without the benefit of what some pupils can enjoy in third grade these days: classroom discussions about gender fluidity. Now Americans who want to be journalistically literate must master the taxonomy of the various vibes.
And pity the senior citizens who began receiving Social Security payments before realizing that all their lives they have been living surrounded by people emitting vibes, and in vibe-soaked situations. These seniors have been radiating their own vibes. They are like the startled character Jourdain in Moliere's play 'The Bourgeois Gentleman' who exclaimed: 'My God! I've been speaking prose for over forty years and didn't even know it.' Talk about excitations.
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