Trans women say influencer Lilly Tino's 'rage-baiting' posts are putting them at risk

Daily Mail​

6 days ago

Trans activist Lilly Contino has been condemned by trans women for putting the already marginalized community at risk of even greater 'harm and malice' by reinforcing negative stereotypes in 'ragebait' clips on TikTok.
The most recent controversy stemmed from a viral post that included mirror selfies of the 31-year-old as she 'rated' the women's bathrooms at Disney World in Florida - and has spiraled into a call for Lilly to be 'banned' from TikTok and the amusement park.
A Change.org petition started by a 'concerned parent' has received over 500,000 signatures at the time of writing, as its creator urged the platform to 'carefully evaluate Lilly Tino's presence' on it.
Georgia native Lilly - who was born male - rose to fame in 2022 when she came out on professional networking platform LinkedIn, adding: 'Hey, my name is Lilly and I use she/her'.
Since then, she has used her social media platforms - with over half a million followers in total - to document her trans journey, but critics within her own community say the influencer is doing more harm than good.
Earlier this month, Lilly found herself at the center of a social media storm after she shared a series of selfies taken inside women's bathrooms at Disney World - forcing trans women to publicly declare 'we do not condone' her behavior.
The photographs were uploaded to TikTok and showed the reflection of Lilly - wearing different crop tops and Disney Ears headbands - in different mirrors inside the toilets.
In a few snaps, other guests at the amusement park are also visible in the background - with several people calling Lilly out for violating the women's privacy.
The TikTok has received over 15 million views and 70,000 comments - most of which are critical - at the time of writing as trans women say it's only the latest example of Lilly's brand of content that prioritizes user engagement over the community's safety.
Her detractors argue that Lilly's TikTok presents a warped portrayal of trans women with the sole purpose of gaining views and social media clout - without considering how they might adversely impact their well-being in what is already a hostile environment.
Secretly recording waitstaff that 'misgender' at American restaurants, 'sneaking' into women's bathrooms, and using corndogs and cake pops to explain sex modification - while surrounded by children at amusement parks - play into transphobic cliches, it is felt.
'I promise you that trans women do not walk around begging to be misgendered or enter women's spaces with the intent of causing a public disturbance - let alone document it and put it online,' Jade Dugger clarified in a strong reaction video to Lilly's Disney clip.
'Because going into several different women's restrooms and rating them online, taking photos in those restrooms, and posting those photos knowing that there are other women in the background is very predatory behavior that we do not condone.'
In response to Lilly's admission she 'peed standing up' at the bathroom at Disney World, influencer Amelia Majesty said 'these videos are rapidly decreasing trans acceptance'.
She also blasted the American content creator for suggesting trans women don't need to 'disclose' they've had 'their downstairs done' before getting intimate with a partner, adding: 'What is there to disclose? There's no deception.'
Shaking her head in disagreement, Amelia replied: 'Trans women need to disclose they're trans before that happens, this is unacceptable and wrong - and it puts the entire community in danger.'
She said Lilly's 'advice' - which was widely discredited in the comments - fuels the 'negative stereotype' that trans women are 'trying to trap men, and that's absolutely not true'.
According to another creator Dominque Morgan, is that Lilly is the 'product of TikTok' - and uses sensationalism to drive engagement by cosplaying as children's cartoon characters or exaggeratedly describing how being 'misgendered' created an 'unsafe' or 'threatening' environment.
Trans influencer Seana Momsen dismissed Lilly by saying 'I don't think' of her, adding: 'I think she just rage-baits for the views, for the money and she's quite dramatic with her pieces.'
Reacting to videos of Lilly expressing profound hurt at being misgendered - including leaving restaurants despite receiving an apology - Seana added that 'we're not at the place where everyone is going to default' to gender-neutral pronouns.
Lilly has since addressed the backlash in a separate video - that has been viewed over eight million times - as she doubled-down on her decision to post the bathroom ratings in a statement that, many felt, missed the point.
Lilly said bathroom selfies were a common fixture of celebrity's social media profiles as she added: 'And it's not just celebrities. Any woman you ever meet has likely taken a photo in a public bathroom.
'So, what is different about me that I'm not allowed to take bathroom selfies?'
She argued that people judge trans women differently 'depending on how well they pass' or whether they 'look trans'.
'I know that I don't pass, trust me I know,' she continued. 'But passing privilege is a real thing.
'There are some trans women out there who will never be able to pass. Do they deserve to be treated differently? No! They should be able to take bathroom selfies too.'
She dismissed the privacy concerns in relation to the women that appeared in the background of the now-contentious clips - after some social media users cited the Florida statute 810.145 that prohibits 'digital voyeurism' in places where people have a reasonable expectation of privacy like bathrooms.
Lilly asserted that 'law only applied to buildings owned or leased' by the state, before adding: 'And even if it wasn't allowed, who cares! Let us tinkle in peace.'
Reacting to the statement, TikTok users pointed out celebrity bathroom selfies don't typically 'have people in the background' as they said 'not everything is transphobia'.
Lilly's visit to the Happiest Place on Earth has taken on a distinctively unhappy twist in view of the backlash - but the bathroom selfies aren't the only thing people have complained about.
She was called out by internet users after she refused to eat her meal at Tiffins Restaurant at Disney's Animal Kingdom Park after the waiter accidentally misgendered her.
She was eating Tiffins Restaurant at Disney's Animal Kingdom Park and the waiter was explaining the first course when he used the male pronoun.
Despite the employee instantly apologizing, Lilly explained in her video about the incident that she 'no longer felt safe' at the restaurant.
She ultimately decided she didn't want to eat there anymore because she knew she wouldn't 'enjoy' the food with her 'guard up.'
The content creator ended up not having to pay for the food or her drink, but the interaction left some viewers disgruntled.
In the now-viral video, Lilly was seen sitting at the table as the waiter brought out her first course, the $18 Tiffins Signature Bread Service.
But as the waiter was explaining where all the different breads came from, he called Lilly, who was wearing a blue, cropped tank top, white jean shorts, and pink Minnie ears with a bow, 'sir.'
'It's coconut bread from Thailand?' Lilly asked, to which the waiter replied, 'Yes sir.'
'It's ma'am,' Lilly quickly corrected him.
'Ma'am, I'm sorry. My bad sir,' the flustered waiter said.
Afterwards, Lilly reflected on the moment to the camera, explaining: 'That totally sucked the joy out of this bread tower.'
Controversial: Lilly's interaction with the waiter has since gone viral, gaining million of views on both of her platforms
'It makes me want to immediately leave because I no longer feel safe here. Now my guard has to be up.
'I'm not gonna enjoy this bread as much because my guard is up. We should be able to go places and not have to worry.'
The video then cut to Lilly flagging down a waiter, and telling them: 'I don't think I want this bread tower, actually, I'd rather have the check if that's okay.
'I think their training says they're supposed to say "friend" and not used gendered language, it's a pretty big thing that Disney has done,' Lilly told the camera in another clip.
'Nothing was wrong with the bread, I just don't want it anymore. Just because they apologized doesn't mean [I] don't feel sad or offended.
'Have you accidentally ever hurt someone and said, "I'm so sorry, it's an accident?" Do you expect them to be like, "Oh, it was an accident, of course, no problem whatsoever. All of that hurt is now undone." That's not how it works.'
It appeared that Lilly didn't have to pay for the uneaten bread or her soda.
In one final clip, a staff member at the restaurant was heard apologizing to Lilly once again, before he told her that her drink was 'also on him,' seemingly confirming the bread was free too.
'They meant well but it still hurts,' Lilly captioned the clip.
In March 2022, it was announced that Disney World staff members, as well recordings throughout the parks, would no longer include 'gendered greetings' like 'boys and girls' or 'ladies and gentleman.'
In December 2022, the same year that Lilly came out, she said that bullies and drug addiction stopped her from realizing her gender for 27 years.
It was only when she got clean did she understand her gender identity - after relocating to San Francisco from Atlanta and went to Target to buy a dress and 'put on a wig'.
She added: 'It was a bittersweet moment because I thought there's something here, it's the answer to my emptiness and loneliness, I've been living a lie.
'I kept it a secret and I would try on clothes and makeup - it was a cocoon and I was figuring it out on my own.'
By December 2020 Lilly was sure of her true identity and knew her name instantly.
She said: 'Like many trans people, I'd been playing videogames for years and I would always pick girls and call them Lilly.'
She gained a mentor, a trans woman in 2020 called Eve who helped her to discover herself and answer any questions she had.
In October 2021, she told her best friends Deborah and Jake on a trip to Atlanta - before coming out to her parents and brother.
Lilly started wearing dresses and make-up and was prescribed the hormones spironolactone in May 2021, a male hormone suppressant, progesterone and later oestrogen.
She added: 'Taking progesterone helps the boobs and my emotions run hotter. I cry a lot better now.'
Lilly worries for trans women who don't have insurance to pay for hormones, and says many are resorting to buying hormones off the black market.
She added: 'There is a global shortage of oestrogen and progesterone right now.'
Lilly has since undergone FFS - with the influencer revealing her new face on TikTok.
In 2023, Lilly revealed she was verbally assaulted at a restaurant in San Francisco while she was dining with her dog at the Cheesecake Factory.
In the clip, the woman can be heard describing herself as a TERF - or a trans-exclusionary radical feminist - before threatening Lilly with physical violence.