The Right Way To Use Your Out-Of-Office Message

Forbes

02-07-2025

Dog in bathtub
A better vacation starts with a better OOO—and getting real about unplugging.
Most of us have a complicated relationship with the out-of-office (OOO) autoreply. Some Alpha types refuse to use it at all, ghosting their inbox while off-grid at Burning Man. Others switch it on if they're just stepping out for a dentist appointment. And then there are the classics: the message still announcing 'I will return on December 27' ... in mid-February. Or the OOO that stays live well into the person's first week back.
Over the years I've developed a few tactics for using the OOO to improve the quality of my vacations and holidays, which I'm happy to share:
1. Only Use OOO If You're Really Off
If you're going to be reachable and checking email regularly, skip the OOO: you're just working normally, even if it's in a different time zone than usual. I only turn on the OOO if I truly plan to disconnect: usually for a family vacation. But even then, not always. Like many of my clients, I take too many "vacations" where I'm online much of the day. The OOO is not for these situations.
2. Don't Announce Normal Work Activities
Going to a conference? Flying overseas for a pitch? These aren't good reasons for an OOO. Unless you're in a role where split-second response is critical (and if you are a senior executive, you should rarely be in such a position) announcing that you're 'in Buenos Aires for a meeting' may read like poor time management—or showing off your frequent flyer status.
3. Keep It Short and Simple
Your OOO is not your Instagram. Skip the mojito emoji and 'Off to South Beach, baby!' Nobody wants your travelogue. A crisp message like 'I'm away until [DATE]4. Update Your OOO Every Time You Activate It
If your OOO says you'll be back on January 2 but it's Easter break, you're telegraphing sloppiness. Similarly, if I get your bounce-back on Thursday, and it says you will be back the previous Monday, your attention to detail may be in question. 'Your OOO is still on' is the e-mail equivalent of the video call's 'you're on mute.'
5. Turn Your OOO Off Promptly
Once you're back—really back—shut it off. The night before you plan to be fully back on-line is best. Don't be that person who leaves the OOO on until three people have reminded you to turn it off. That signals that you're not really in control of your time—or your systems.
6. Offer a Real Backup (But Only One)
Give people one clear point of contact in your absence. Doing so both relieves anxiety and reinforces that you're truly unavailable. And really, most people won't contact your backup, because most things can wait. Your key people—family, close friends, important clients—already have your cell number, and they'll call you if it's really an emergency.
Those are the mechanics. But the mindset? That's a whole 'nother thing.
I was recently talking about the OOO with my longtime client and now close friend Joel Bines—a fellow consultant and seasoned road warrior—about how people use (or misuse) the OOO. We've both logged our share of business miles and try, imperfectly, to take real vacations with our families. With his customary wit and incisiveness, Joel noted that it's not really about the time away from the laptop, it's about the mindset about vacations more generally
As the cherry on top, Joel offers a few refreshingly blunt vacation principles: guidelines that not only protect your time off, but to force you to be honest with yourself about how you spend it.
First, put your phone on 'Do Not Disturb.' If the matter is urgent, the caller will try twice, and that second ring will get through. Meanwhile, you'll dramatically reduce the temptation to check every ping.
Second, if you know you'll have to jump into something for work, just stay behind. Don't join the hike or the boat ride and then spend the whole time on your phone. You'll ruin the experience—for yourself and everyone else. This is about making a real choice: be present at work or be present with your family. Don't try to fake both.
And third, don't be ridiculous. There's almost nothing at work that can't be moved, delayed, or delegated if you're willing to ask. Most people don't want to ask: it's more gratifying to feel indispensable. But that combination of ego and workplace hero mythology robs you of the very thing your vacation is supposed to give you: renewal, perspective, and presence.
So, the next time you're planning to take time off, start by writing a better OOO. But don't stop there. Use your OOO as a signal—to your inbox and to yourself—that it's time to truly log off. Joel's right: most of what we think is urgent isn't. And most of what's truly important can't be found in your inbox, anyway.