Sacrificed at the altar of `illegal marriages', poor Muslim women face abandonment

Time of India

10 hours ago

Hyderabad: She was 28 when Imran* came home asking for her hand in marriage. And more than Rabia*, it was her daily wager parents who rejoiced in that moment. Their daughter was the eldest of five siblings, way past the "ideal" marriage age and often, discreetly ridiculed among relatives, for her "ordinary" physical attributes.
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So, when the small-time trader from Hussaini Alam demanded an 'off-the-record' wedding, nobody objected. Imran assured a Mehr (gift given by husband to the wife at the time of a Muslim wedding) of Rs 50,000, gathered two witnesses and it was done. There was neither a Qazi nor a nikah nama (a formal marriage contract as per Islamic tradition).
Three months hence, Rabia has been unceremoniously abandoned. She is back at her parents' modest home in First Lancer – hiding from the man she thought would take care of her for life.
And though beaten and bruised, she has no locus standi to drag Imran to the cops or the court.
"Without a nikah nama, there is no official proof of the marriage. How can I take any action against him?" a visibly distraught Rabia told TOI, adding how despite the abuse, she is, unfortunately, at the mercy of her husband for survival. "My parents are too poor. They married me off, knowing this was illegal, only because they thought they'd have one less mouth to feed. Now, if he doesn't give me any money for sustenance what will I or my family do?"
This ugly face of contract marriages without documents – a menace alive and thriving in the battered alleys of Hyderabad's Old City for years now – has pushed scores of poor Muslim women into a state of absolute helplessness.
Locally referred to as 'Khutbah ki shaadi' (Khutbah is one of the religious sermons recited during an official nikah), these illegal weddings have become frequent in recent times, say social activists working with the victims.
And the storyline in most cases is much the same: the woman is past her "prime", taken in by the husband for a few months and then abruptly dumped – often for another woman. But none of the victims have legal documents to prove their nikah.
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Social workers explain how this 'trend' of dummy marriages started picking up post the decriminalisation of adultery in 2018. "This, coupled with the ban on triple talaq that came in 2017, led to several men, unwilling to get tangled in legalities, abandoning their women without a formal divorce," said Jameela Nishat, founder of Shaheen Women's Resource and Welfare Association. "These are much like contract marriages, but worse.
While the former are illegal too, they at least have a nikah nama and a Qazi, allowing the women some room to fight for their Mehr or maintenance money. These illegal Khutbah marriages have taken even that right away."
The women subjected to such arrangements confirmed that such marriages come with no assurances (barring verbal) of any kind -- no supporting documents and, of course, no legal or religious stamp of approval.
Some women are given a stamp paper (TOI has a copy of one such marriage document), but all it has are the names of the two people getting married and the witnesses.
"He was with me for eight months. Then suddenly, one day, he dropped me off at my mother's house in Saidabad and asked me not to come back again. After days of cajoling him to return, he said he has a girlfriend and wants to be with her," said a distraught Samiya* whose husband, she found, has had more than one Khutbah ki shaadi.
The 30-something is now pleading with the man to either reunite or offer her monetary help to stay afloat.
TOI's investigation revealed that there are marriage bureaus operating in different parts of the city, clandestinely arranging such illegal marriages – albeit for a fat commission.
"Yes, we will get it done…It will be for three months…There'll be no nikah nama or Qazi… We will take all precautions to ensure there is no problem (read: police scrutiny)," said the woman from the other side of the telephone when TOI called one such bureau in Langar Houz, posing as a prospective client.
She claimed that the availability of the 'bride' will depend on the money the man's family (that TOI posed to represent) was willing to pay. "We usually arrange for women who have been previously married. But if you are willing to pay Rs 5 lakh, we can get you an unmarried girl also. We will get the girl to sign a contract to ensure she doesn't create any issues once the marriage is over," the woman continued, asking TOI to send the prospective groom's biodata over WhatsApp.
All the 'dealings', she said, would happen at her office in Malakpet. The bureau's commission: an undisclosed percentage of the lump sum.
"Most of the money is pocketed by these agents with just a fraction finally going the woman's way…They also, usually, fish for distressed women who are aging, are extremely poor or abandoned by men in the past, as they are easy prey," said another social activist working in the Old City.
Afreen* is a classic example. While she was promised a monthly maintenance of Rs 15,000 when she agreed to the 'stamp paper wedding' for three months, she hasn't received a single paisa so far. "He just disappeared one day, leaving me with a child who is disabled," said the 30-year-old struggling for one square meal. Her ailing father had consented to the marriage, about a year ago, only because the family coffers were fast drying up and there were three more daughters waiting in line for nikah.
Expressing extreme displeasure over the existence of such marriages, Mufti Omar Abideen said Islam does not allow for such "illegal" contracts. "Marriage is like worship and under Islamic law, it must be revered not belittled. Also, adding Khutbah to such contract weddings doesn't make them legal and shariah compliant. In fact, it amounts to misuse of the word that is associated with something pious," he said.
* All names have been changed to protect identities