"We Simply Do Not Care Anymore": Women Over 40 Are Sharing Things They're Fed Up With At This Point
If you have not ridden the rollercoaster known as perimenopause, congrats. Ditto if you're one of the lucky ones who can say it was "not that bad." But for many women, the years leading up to menopause can bring with them hot flashes, insomnia, vertigo, vaginal dryness, joint pain, and a host of other "fun" surprises. It's like a second puberty, but there's no Judy Blume book for this.
So when I, a frequent flyer on Hot Flash Airlines, came across Melani (@justbeingmelani) on TikTok, it was like a breath of fresh air. Melani is the founder of the "We Do Not Care Club," a group for women in perimenopause and menopause. In the comments of her daily videos, women share things that we simply do not care about today. Then, the next day, Melani reads them back to the club, and commenters add new submissions.
Here are some of my personal favorite "We Do Not Care Club" submissions that made me laugh and nod my head "yes" so hard I got a neck ache:
1."I don't care that I have a California king and I sleep on one half and the other half is a two-week pile of clothes out of the dryer."
—sam_i_am_1968
2."I don't care what my family eats for dinner NO MORE! Eat Funyuns and jellybeans, WDNC."
—khershalynn
3."WDNC what we look like from the back. That is not our business."
—sarahh5510
4."WDNC Club....I finally found my people!!!!! WDNC if anyone can tell if we don't have a bra on under the hoodie. The hoodie is an automatic exemption from a bra."
—macarone33
5."We don't care about learning new music. The '90s was the best era anyway!!"
—ashan1976
6."I do not care that my hair has been in a ponytail since 2001."
—amysims50
7."We don't care that we want to be home all day on our days off! Everything I like is at home. I paid for it, Imma stay in it!"
—vhardy.7
8."We do not care what healthy salad, vegan, vegetarian, gluten-free, lactose-free rubbish our co-workers are having for lunch. Just let me eat my lasagne in peace!"
—lararandle1
Related: "I Know You Aren't Trying To Hurt Me." Doctors, Nurses, And First Responders Are Revealing The Most "Haunting" Last Words They've Heard From A Patient
9."And I don't care about the perfect kitchen/bathroom/bedroom beige Pinterest aesthetic. I'm too old and tired. WDNC club."
—itsjusterind
10."We don't care about those lights on the dashboard. If the car is moving, it's fine."
—lemonzest83
11."We do not care if our shoes are cute. Comfortable shoes only."
—rme80
12."I do not care how long it takes for me to put my wallet back into my purse after I pay for my groceries. Your turn starts when I am finished. Don't rush me."
—luckyredfriday
13."WDNC about washing instructions. If it can't survive a cold wash and a dry cycle, then it wasn't for me anyway."
—shannihilation
14."I do not care if people think my legs are too fat for shorts. It's hot. You're lucky I'm wearing anything."
—l.arnold.stepp
Related: 27 Grown-Ass Adults Who Threw Such Unbelievable Temper Tantrums, Even The Brattiest Toddler Couldn't Compete
15."WDNC to go to another work event. My teambuilding skills expired and will not be renewed."
—bethklongpayabal
16."We do not care if the AC is on 60. Don't touch that fan. If you're cold, get an extra blanket. I'm good."
—mizzterminator
17."I do not care if I fart when I walk. It is out of my control."
—heidimark1
18."WDNC about folding our fitted sheets. I'm rolling them up in a ball and throwing them in the dresser. They will straighten themselves out!!!"
—sprouting_with_ivy
19."We do not care to wear hard pants ever again."
—mylittlegardenplot
20."We do not care if we said we would go. We changed our minds as soon as we got home."
—spot.on.shay
21."I do not care if my resting b—— face offends anyone. It's my face, it's not going to change right now."
—lorib431
22."We do not care if we have pet hair all over our clothes. Our pets are the only people we like."
—mookiepookie23
23."WDNC. I'm gonna start eating the rotisserie chicken as soon as I get in the car."
—yourmom77777777777
24."We do not care if it says 'Not Dishwasher Safe.' It's about to learn some hard lessons in this house 😆."
—theathletesocialcoach
25."Logging in from the Paris, France chapter of the WDNC club. We do not care if carbs and butter are 'bad' for us. Give us the damn croissant and nobody gets hurt."
—giadecadenet
26."WDNC if the house is clean when you come over, also don't come over."
—bratcat178
27."WDNC if we forget the name of something. We will make a new word for it, and you will have to understand what I meant."
—noonespecial0515
28."We do not care that we no longer keep a poker face at work. My eyebrow said what it said."
—tlen1985
29."We do not care if a side part or a middle part is the hot trend. We style our hair whatever way the wind blows."
—caryzel
30."We do not care if we repeat the same story twice. If it was good once, it'll be better the second time."
—dorkapottamus
31.And finally, "I do not care that this club is for perimenopause/menopause women and I'm in my 20s, I relate to everything 🤣❤️."
—imjustdolly_
Follow Melani on TikTok to join the club, and let us know what you do not care about today in the comments!
Also in Internet Finds: 51 Wildly Fascinating Photos Of Disorders, Injuries, And Variations In The Human Body That I Cannot Stop Staring At
Also in Internet Finds: 23 People Who Tried Their Best, But Crapped The Bed So Bad
Also in Internet Finds: 19 Things Society Glorifies That Are Actually Straight-Up Terrible, And We Need To Stop Pretending Otherwise
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Fox News
13 minutes ago
- Fox News
'Men don't belong in women's sports,' NBA star believes amid debate over transgender athletes
The inclusion of transgender athletes has been hotly debated in the sports world and beyond. NBA star Jonathan Isaac has previously shared his thoughts on the topic. Last year, the Orlando Magic forward appeared to take particular issue with the White House's commemoration of "Transgender Day of Visibility." Events at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue took place on March 31, the same day as 2024 Easter Sunday. Isaac has a faith-based sports apparel and shoe line called "UNITUS" and he often pubically discusses his Christian conviction. "They want you to hate! This helps no one and only promotes division," he wrote. "They know exactly what they are doing.. we should be angry but shouldn't lose the spirit of what tomorrow means! Don't lose focus. Because He is risen there is hope for all." In a recent interview with Fox News Digital, Isaac further explained his stance on transgender athletes' eligibility in girls' and women's sports. "It's just a tough situation. There's an ethic… there's something that I believe is true. I believe that men and women are different. I believe that men do not belong in women's sports, that's a fundamental belief I hold. For reasons, one I'm a guy and I can understand the difference and the advantages that we have," Isaac said. "But at the same time there is a reality of the situation… there are people who are not in sports who are transgender (who) are trying to live their life the best way they know how. And they have this feeling of what they believe is right and who else is to say they are wrong in some sense." Isaac acknowledged the humanity of the complex situation, but said his belief in the fundamental differences between men and women ultimately prompted him to draw a line in the sand. "But where I stake my flag is, I believe that in order to cater to the feelings of this group, I would have to trample on the feelings of women to get there. And that's where I say, 'OK, that's where I believe this is wrong' and I would be willing to put my voice to it. I understand the humanity of the situation. I feel for the humanity of the situation. But at the end of the day, I believe it's right to stand on the truth of men and women are different. And I wouldn't want my daughter to have to compete against a transgender athlete (who) has gone through puberty or has testosterone." Isaac shares two daughters with his wife. Shortly after President Donald Trump's second term began, he signed an executive order effectively banning transgender athletes from participating in girls' and women's sports. The executive order, "Keeping Men Out of Women's Sports," was based on Title IX, part of a civil rights law passed in 1972 that prohibits discrimination on the basis of sex in federally funded education programs. The order instructed the Department of Education to investigate academic institutions that failed to comply. If a school is deemed to be in noncompliance, federal funds could be withdrawn. Elsewhere, the International Olympic Committee has decided to allow global federations that govern a variety of sports to create their respective eligibility rules. Under Trump's executive order, the State Department is instructed to demand changes within the committee. The NCAA reacted to the executive order by introducing a sweeping new policy. The organization's updated participation policy, which was announced in February, stated that only "student-athletes assigned female at birth" will be allowed to take part in intercollegiate athletic competitions. The latest policy does permit "student-athletes assigned male at birth to practice with women's teams and receive benefits like medical care." However, those athletes are banned from any NCAA-sanctioned competitions. In December 2024, NCAA President Charlie Baker told a Senate committee there were "less than 10" transgender college student athletes he was aware of at the time. Baker, who was the Republican governor of Massachusetts from 2015-2023, also confirmed that there are roughly "five hundred and ten thousand" athletes enrolled in more than 1,000 colleges and universities across all 50 states that the NCAA oversees. Follow Fox News Digital's sports coverage on X, and subscribe to the Fox News Sports Huddle newsletter.
Yahoo
13 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Veterans fume after VA partially blames them for overpayments it claws back
Christopher Praino signed a waiver relinquishing his disability compensation from the Department of Veterans Affairs after he was ordered to active duty in fall 2019. In a letter, the VA confirmed it would terminate his roughly $965 monthly payments because, by law, he could not receive both VA benefits and active-duty pay at the same time. But the agency did not fully halt the payments. Instead, it sent various monthly amounts over the next three years, ranging from $0 to over $2,000, Praino's records show. 'The VA never stopped,' he said, 'after response after response, call after call, walk-in after walk-in.' In 2023, despite Praino's repeated efforts to rectify the inconsistent installments that should have ended years ago, the VA informed him in a letter that he owed nearly $68,000. That year, the government began automatically clawing some of the money out of his military paychecks, which he uses to support five children and his wife, leaving him in dire financial straits. 'No words can tell you the emotional, mental and physical heartache I have every day dealing with this,' he said. 'It's eating away at me.' In a recent congressional oversight hearing focused on why the VA regularly overpays veterans and then asks for the money back, agency officials partially blamed veterans for the exorbitant errors, telling lawmakers that some veterans have been failing to report eligibility changes that would have lowered their monthly disability compensation or pension payments. But Praino and two other veterans told NBC News they did notify the VA in a timely manner. Yet, records show the agency continued overpaying them for months, sometimes years, before asking for the money back. The long-delayed adjustments, which can cause veterans to incur life-changing debts, may indicate another operational shortfall at the VA weeks after officials testified that the agency doles out about $1 billion in overpayments each year due to administrative errors and other factors. The VA overpaid about $5.1 billion in disability compensation and pension payments from fiscal year 2021 to fiscal year 2024, according to Rep. Morgan Luttrell, R-Texas, who chairs the House Subcommittee on Disability Assistance and Memorial Affairs. The issue is recurring and getting worse, Luttrell told NBC News, even as the Trump administration has cut billions of dollars in grants and slashed thousands of federal jobs in an attempt to trim what it sees as waste and inefficiency in federal spending. 'It's not the veterans' fault,' Luttrell said. 'It's the system that is failing.' In a statement, VA press secretary Peter Kasperowicz said the agency, under new leadership, is 'working hard to fix longstanding problems, such as billions of dollars per year in overpayments.' Luttrell said the overpayment issue is complex, largely stemming from tiers of human error and an outdated computer system that he said does not adequately allow information to be shared between local and national VA offices. 'You have to get the software to talk to each other. You have to get the veterans to communicate. You have to get the actors inside the VA to move accordingly, and then you have to make sure the system is lined out as it needs to be,' he said. 'That is such a complex problem set to solve.' In 2015, after his divorce was finalized, veteran Brent Aber said he went to his local VA's office in Akron, Ohio, to remove his ex-wife as a dependent. 'I thought, OK, all is done,' he said. Aber said it felt like he was officially closing a difficult chapter in his life. But eight years later, another nightmare emerged when the national VA's Debt Management Center sent him a letter, notifying him that he had to pay back more than $17,700. Aber, who served in both the Navy and Army for a dozen years, said he called the VA to find out how he accrued this debt. He said he was told that different VA computer systems do not communicate with one another, meaning the dependent removal may have never been registered nationally, and his monthly payments had not decreased as they should have. Kasperowicz, the VA spokesperson, disputed claims made by Aber and Luttrell about the computer systems, saying the VA has had a centralized claims system since 2013 that 'ensures updated information is reflected' for each veteran. Upon follow-up, Luttrell could not be reached for comment on the VA's dispute. Kasperowicz did not offer an explanation as to what happened in Aber's case and said the VA has no record of his dependent change request from 2015. Aber said he spent more than a year fighting the recoupment and claimed financial hardship. But in May, the VA began withholding nearly $500 from his monthly compensation payments until the debt is cleared. To make up for the loss, Aber, who lost both of his legs in a training accident and is now mostly bedridden, said he stopped using a house cleaning service and is mostly eating cheaper, microwavable food. 'I provided all the paperwork at the time of the divorce, but that didn't seem to matter,' he said. The 50-year-old said the VA's recoupment hurts more as he fights for medical care. He said he has been struggling with severe pain and swelling since he underwent revision surgery on his limbs about two years ago with the hopes of getting fitted again for prosthetics. While Aber said his primary care doctor referred him to an orthopedic surgeon with expertise in double amputations, he said the VA denied the referral. Kasperowicz said the "entirety of the VA Northeast Ohio Healthcare System orthopedic section" and other health care providers have evaluated Aber and "all have agreed that there are no additional surgical options that would provide him pain relief or improved function." "The medical consensus is to continue amputee clinic, physical therapy, pain management and behavioral health treatments to address the complexity of his condition," Kasperowicz said. Aber said the double battle he has been waging against the VA has left him feeling frustrated and betrayed. 'I feel like I've been completely done wrong,' he said. In Bonaire, Georgia, veteran John Mullens reported a dependent change in February after his 18-year-old son became eligible for a separate VA educational benefit that provides monthly payments to cover the cost of school. By law, veterans cannot receive both benefits at the same time, which Mullens knew from his own research. NBC News reviewed records from his VA portal, showing he filed a request to remove a dependent on Feb. 18. The claim was assigned to a reviewer on Feb. 19, the portal shows. And there were no other updates until May when Mullens received a letter from the VA, alerting him to the duplicate payments, which the VA said resulted in about $340 in overpayments each month. 'They did nothing with the information and continued to overpay me,' Mullens, 55, said. 'The processes are broken.' Kasperowicz said it currently takes an average of about 21 days for the VA to remove a dependent and an average of about 91 days to add one. Of the nearly $1.4 billion overpaid in fiscal year 2021, Kasperowicz said about $913 million was related to dependent changes. The VA does not track data showing how many veterans in overpayment cases actually did report changes on time, Kasperowicz said. The overpayments sometimes span many years. In 2023, the VA temporarily suspended the collection of pension debts for thousands of low-income wartime veterans and their survivors after the agency identified an issue with its income verification that led to overpayments between 2011 and 2022. On May 14, Luttrell and other members of the House subcommittee pressed VA officials to explain how the agency planned to fix the problem. Nina Tann, executive director of the VA's compensation service, testified that the agency, which serves about 9.1 million people, has a 'heightened risk' of making improper payments due to the large number of beneficiaries and the high-dollar amounts it doles out. Tann said the agency has taken steps to prevent, detect and correct the issue, including being better about notifying veterans that they need to report changes. Tann also said the VA fixed an administrative error in January that had been causing duplicate payments for about 15,000 veterans with dependents in fiscal year 2024. The agency did not force those veterans to repay the money, she said. Kasperowicz said the VA does not seek to recoup overpayments when administrative errors, including issues related to the VA's online filing platform, are to blame. But Praino, who owes almost $68,000 after re-enlisting, said it has been challenging to prove the VA made an administrative error. 'They will not admit any mistake,' said Praino, 42, an Army sergeant first class, who has been serving in the National Guard full time since 2019. The VA did not immediately comment on Praino's case. The VA transferred Praino's debt to the Treasury Department, which notified Praino in a December 2023 letter that it is required to withhold up to 15% of his federal wages. The Treasury Department began automatically garnishing about $800 from his monthly paychecks in 2023, according to documents provided by Praino. Praino, who is based in Georgia, now takes home about $3,800 a month, which he said barely covers the rent. With car payments, student loans and other expenses and bills, Praino said he has been racking up his credit card with essential purchases like food for his family. Praino said he has post-traumatic stress disorder, depression and traumatic brain injury after first serving in the Navy from 2001 to 2003 and then in the Army. 'When you add a financial crisis to the mix, and you're continuing to serve, which is always a high-stress environment 24/7, my emotional state, my mental state, it is a wreck,' he said. This article was originally published on
Yahoo
13 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Authorities make disturbing discovery after searching man's vehicle at US-Mexico border: 'We are committed to holding accountable ...'
In San Diego, authorities arrested a man for smuggling protected birds from Mexico into the U.S., according to a report by Patch. Twelve orange-fronted parakeets were concealed among his belongings, stuffed inside his boots and between the seats of his car. Prosecutors in the U.S. Attorney's Office reported that Mexican citizen Naim Lajud Libien was caught trying to smuggle a dozen parakeets across the U.S.-Mexico border at the Otay Mesa port of entry in San Diego. Of the 12 birds, at least two have died, one that officials believe to have a broken neck, and the rest are in "poor health." When authorities found the parakeets, the birds' feet were tied, which may have caused some harm. Orange-fronted parakeets are a protected bird species native to western Mexico and Costa Rica. In order to be legally transported into the U.S., the birds must be quarantined before crossing the border. Libien faces up to 20 years in prison and a $250,000 fine for attempting to smuggle the parakeets into the U.S. The animals being trafficked are often held captive in small, awful conditions, resulting in injuries and even death. Cases like this not only endanger the animals being trafficked but also the entire ecosystem. When species are illegally transported into a new country, they can become invasive and disrupt the balance of the food chain. Though it may not seem like it, biodiversity impacts our everyday lives. When an invasive species throws off an ecosystem, native species can decline, threatening the pollinators that protect our food supply. Libien faces "charges of importation contrary to law," Patch reported. "Smuggling at the border takes many forms, but the tragic impact on animals forced into such perilous conditions is deeply troubling," U.S. Attorney Adam Gordon said in a statement, per Patch. "We are committed to holding accountable those who endanger wildlife and public health through these reckless and inhumane smuggling practices." Do you think America has a plastic waste problem? Definitely Only in some areas Not really I'm not sure Click your choice to see results and speak your mind. Join our free newsletter for good news and useful tips, and don't miss this cool list of easy ways to help yourself while helping the planet.
