East Bay journalist reflects on ‘finding a new rock bottom' in ‘Lying Drunk'

San Francisco Chronicle​

05-07-2025

Tony Hicks, 58, has been a lot of things: an award-winning columnist with Bay Area News Group and Bay City News, a father, a husband, and a heavy metal drummer.
In his new book, ' Lying Drunk,' Hicks comes clean about his not-so-secret identity as a recovering alcoholic. Like his columns, the stories are told with sobering clarity and snarky self-deprecating humor from someone who once blew a field sobriety test of 0.56% — a number that eclipsed that of Led Zeppelin's late drummer John Bonham, who died from alcohol poisoning. 'I finally found something I could do better than John Bonham,' Hicks wrote.
It's a heartbreaking work of staggering intoxication that documents the homes and cars he's wrecked, the rehabs he's entered and escaped, and the trail of bottles, grief and broken promises left scattered behind.
Hicks spoke to the Chronicle from his Walnut Creek home about his rockiest of rock bottoms, letting his mom read the first manuscript, and his pick to voice the audiobook.
This conversation has been edited for length and clarity.
Q: You've been to rehab more than 10 times. What was the rockiest rock bottom?
A: The first time people go into rehab is when they've hit rock bottom. I kept finding a new rock bottom over and over again. One weekend, I spent the first night in the psych ward because my 70-something mother kicked me out of her house. I left the psych ward to walk to the liquor store and spent the second night in jail. The third night, I spent on a Martinez park bench wearing a T-shirt and shorts in January. That's when I knew I'd hit rock bottom.
It's tough to turn that weekend into a positive. It's really hard not to just be overwhelmed by shame. I had kids. I had a career. After all that, it was hard to be an optimist and put that in the past, to be positive and move forward. This book is helping me do that.
Q: Has your mom read the book?
A: I wasn't going to let my mom read it before publication because I thought she would come back with dozens of changes, but I let her read it. She was a little upset because she relived a lot of the stuff that happened to her son. I almost died at least three or four times. But my mom loves the book. I think she bought 10 copies to give out to friends.
Q: Which chapter was the hardest to write or reread?
A: The last chapter. I hadn't processed losing most of my friends until I wrote that last chapter. Some of them go back to eighth grade, and that was really tough.
Q: Does the book serve as an additional measure of accountability for yourself?
A: That was probably the scariest thing for me in writing this book: Once it's out there, I'm accountable. The saying 'One day at a time' was something I struggled with early on during the recovery process: If I think, 'One day I'm never gonna drink again,' it feels like I'm never going to see my best friend again. Or that I'm never going to see that woman I love again. Alcohol was my best friend. I relied on it. It helped me before it turned evil and really bad. It motivated me and made me feel better. It made me feel smart and handsome. It was my best friend on the planet. Until it wasn't.
Q: At one low point, you ranked yourself a -6 in the 12-step Alcoholics Anonymous recovery program.
A: I've been to thousands of Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. AA was really great for me when I was transitioning from rehab to regular life again, or when I had a bad episode and I needed help immediately.
But I'm not a big joiner, and the God stuff just doesn't click with me. Six of the 12 steps talk about a higher power and that you can have whatever you want as your higher power. That said, I still go to AA meetings every now and then just to connect with people. And I have other alcoholics who I'm connected to, one of whom I talk to every day.
A: I've found getting up first thing in the morning and getting my ass into the gym, even if it's just for a half hour, makes all the difference in the world to my state of mind. I need to stay busy. Boredom is a big enemy of alcoholics everywhere.