
If Your Home Needs A Deep Clean, These 30 Products Have You Covered
We hope you love our recommendations! Some may have been sent as samples, but all were independently selected by our editors. Just FYI, BuzzFeed and its publishing partners may collect a share of sales and/or other compensation from the links on this page.
You might despise cleaning the bathroom, but this overnight shower cleaner basically does the work for you.
1. An EasyWring microfiber spin mop since your floors do, in fact, need to be mopped even though you'd like to think otherwise. The handle extends up to four feet, and the built-in mop wringer allows for hands-free wringing making mopping just a little bit less of a headache.
O-Cedar/YouTube / Via www.youtube.com
Promising review: " After seeing a TikTok where a woman demonstrated this mop to clean her walls, and hearing my boss raving about it, I decided to click the Amazon button. Let me tell you, I HATE cleaning, I HATE mopping, but I LOVE for things to be clean. I was able to mop the entire house TWICE (Because it was that dirty. Please don't judge.) within an hour. A few days later I mopped the entire house again within 10 minutes because they weren't quite as dirty. On another positive note, my boys love the spinner and think it's a toy! So, every time I get the bucket out my 10-year-old and 4-year-old ask to mop the house because they think it's fun. MAJOR BONUS!" — Molly
Get it from Amazon for $34.96.
2. A foaming garbage disposal cleaner capable of turning your food graveyard into a lemon-scented haven. I think we all can collectively agree that shoving our hand down the disposal to deep clean is not in our job description. Just place the packet in the disposal, let it soak, and turn on your disposal! Easy peasy lemon squeezy!
Amazon
Promising review:"Saw on TikTok (don't judge) and automatically added to cart. So easy to use, takes probably a minute to fully bubble up and clean, and you're left with a clean sink! I use with other drain cleaning products, but would 100% recommend for weekly maintenance." — Jessica Hamilton
Get a four-pack from Amazon for $8.
3. Affresh dishwasher tablets for anyone who doesn't want to get on their hands and knees and stick their head in the dishwasher to clean it. These little tablets do the work for you. All you do is run it on a normal wash cycle and now you have a nice, fresh dishwasher.
Promising review:"After using this product, I am happy to report that my $5 investment saved me over $500. I was ready to replace my dishwasher due to super cloudy glasses, residue, and dishes just not getting clean. Then, I became aware that the water softener was no longer doing its job so I had the rental company replace it. Dishwasher performance improved somewhat. I decided to do two more loads before deciding to purchase a new one. I tossed one of the tablets into the bottom of the full machine per the instructions and ran the regular cycle. I did not expect the results I got! The glassware that I thought was permanently etched and ruined came out like new. Same with cutlery. The difference is unbelievable." — Sheila
Get a pack of six from Amazon for $8.99.
4. A jetted tub cleaner so you can enjoy that big ol' tub of yours without the creeping thought of, "Has anyone ever cleaned these jets?" The results might make you gag a little, but it's way better than having to get down and dirty in each jet because you just pour this in with a full tub, run the jets, and scrub away all the yuk!
Plus, this is septic safe!!
Promising review:"OK, so I am somewhat of a clean freak and I run bleach through the jets prob twice a month on top of my weekly cleaning. And I was skeptical how this product could get it any cleaner than I thought it was. Well I am here to tell you this pic is after the second cleaning with this cleaner!!!! I am a believer and would highly recommend this product to anyone with jetted tub!!" — Momof2greatboys
Get it from Amazon for $18.73.
5. A robot vacuum because sometimes sweeping Roscoe's shedding fur, getting the under-the-bed dust, and picking up all that dirt that your kids trek in from the backyard just... sucks. Thankfully, this powerful vacuum literally ~sucks~ that all up and saves you from having to manually do it yourself.
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
This is super slim so it can easily fit under your low furniture and it automatically returns to its charging station when it's running low on battery.
Promising review:"I should have bought one of these years ago! It's saving me time and effort to clean other stuff around the house. I've been pleasantly surprised how 'Pete' can make it over thresholds that separate our kitchen from the living area and one in the hallway. LOVE how he goes around our kitchen chairs and table and really gets under there to pick up crumbs! My floors look cleaner than they ever have! Go Eufy!" — Natalie M
Get it from Amazon for $229.99+ (available in three styles).
6. A bottle of Wet & Forget cleaner destined to turn your shower and tub from grimy and dirty to spiffy and shiny. All you gotta do is spray, let it sit overnight, and rinse! Finally, now you can enjoy your own scrub-a-dub-dub time *without* having to scrub-a-dub-dub the hard-to-reach crevices on your hands and knees.
www.amazon.com
Promising review: "I used this product as directed and got the promised results! I literally did not have to get down and scrub my tub at all. Scent was very subtle (purchased 'vanilla' option). I'm completely stunned with the fabulous results! Highly recommend!" — kMcav
Get it from Amazon for $18.47+ (available in two scents and two sizes).
7. A flexible drain snake for when it's finally time to tackle that clogged shower drain. This has small micro hooks that grab onto hair easily, and even though the results will make you want to gag, this so comes in handy for those rare deep cleaning sessions.
This pack contains a reusable handle and five single-use heads you can just remove and dispose of after handling your clogged pipes.
Promising review:"Wow. Best thing ever. Seriously. I have had tweezers and sticks and plumbers and chemicals trying to get my master sink to drain. The plumber even said I needed an entirely new faucet to get the drain plug part because they don't sell those separately. Well, I have two sinks, a tub, and a shower that all match, so that was not a valid solution. Doubt I can find the same model. So I bought this thing, stuffed it down, and pulled up hair and black muck. Did it about eight times quickly, ran the water, went right down the drain. Seriously. This is the best tool ever and the best $20 I have ever spent. Everyone with a sink needs this tool. Seriously." — juliejules
Get a five-pack from Amazon for $19.99.
8. The Baseboard Buddy because getting down on your hands and knees like Cinderella is not in your job title (even though cleaning baseboards is something you should do every now and then). The extendable arm gets in places high and low and is way better than pricey disposable dusters because the pads are reusable!
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
The kit comes with one Baseboard Buddy and three reusable pads which can be used wet or dry. And when the microfiber pad is dirty, just rinse and reuse!
Promising review: " Buy it NOW. Honestly, I had huge reservations for this thing. Yet another miracle cleaning tool that will break or bend or something. I was so wrong. It was easy to put together and I sprayed it with Mean Green and went to the baseboards. No more kneeling and no broken back. This thing is amazing. It is durable and the pad is super absorbent. I am so happy. I can't wait to do the rest of the house!" — artgirl
Get it from Amazon for $24.99.
9. The Bissell Little Green, which works ✨wonders✨ on your couches, carpets, and other upholstery items since it literally sucks up dirt, stubborn stains, and any other nasty spills that have worked their way into your life. Forget calling the pros — this little green powerhouse is way more affordable and just as effective.
Amazon, www.amazon.com
Promising review:"Faced with either replacing our dining room chairs or living with the daily reminder of how disgusting children (x3) can be, we decided to replace our chairs. Until we priced some new ones. Enter the Green Machine. This chair has never been cleaned (I know, we're gross). I sprayed the included magical solution, let sit 15 minutes for good measure, and voila. Sorcery. I read zero instructions, just plugged in, and went to town. I would recommend cleaning outside if your item is portable; it minimized the spray on the floor. The dark grey liquid on the collecting side was evidence enough of the dirt and stain-removing powers. Don't second guess; this was <$100 when I purchased it, and while something with steam and heaters and all the gadgets, I am sure, is wonderful, bang for your buck on this one is a no-brainer. Definitely bought us another year or so before we pull the trigger on something new for the kids to ruin." — aih
Get it from Amazon for $98.59.
10. A rust stain remover spray since hard water with high iron levels is slowly turning your white tub into a yellowish-brown eyesore. This gel formula is designed to cling to stains and remove them without any scrubbing.
Note that it's designed for rust stains that come from having hard water; it won't do anything for, like, a rusty metal towel holder.
Promising review:"Can't believe we finally found something that works! When we bought our home there was no water softener and years of iron build up. We tried so many things on our shower. Nothing worked. We were convinced we'd be stuck until we renovated, but the Iron Out worked wonders. I still can't believe it. We let it sit for about an hour. It then dissolved and wiped right off. Definitely use in a ventilated area if possible." — M. Gilardi
Get it from Amazon for $11.36.
11. A nontoxic fireplace cleaner meant to tackle soot, ash, and all fire-related grime that's been building up on your stone and brick. This gel helps make it look brand-spankin' new, and it even comes with a brush for scrubbing!
www.amazon.com
Quick'n Brite is a small business that's been selling eco-friendly cleaning supplies since 1952.
Promising review: " This product works excellently on a river stone fireplace (seen above) with a decade of smoke and dirt. It took two applications but you just apply, wait, then wipe the surface. I'm extremely happy I picked this product. Plus, it's non-toxic and doesn't give off a strong odor." — Daniel G
Get it from Amazon for $17.99+ (available in two sizes and with or without cleaning tools).
12. Bioclean, a hard water stain remover, to bring your glass doors, faucets, and shower heads back to their "what once was" state of clean. Now, with no more hard water stains or gross tile, you can go back to 🎶 singing in the shower 🎶 without a big ol' yikes in between the chorus and the verse.
www.amazon.com
Promising review: "Wow. Don't waste your time with any other formulation that you found online. I've literally tried EVERYTHING! The soap / vinegar / baking soda, the expensive store bought 'hard water cleaners.' I've scrubbed for HOURS! But this…. This product is like magic. It's kind of like a paste that you can rub on with a microfiber towel and the hard water stains literally just RUB OFF. Like butter! Seriously the easiest option I have tried yet. I stopped within the first five minutes of cleaning to do this review because I'm in shock lol. Coming from someone who never writes reviews! Take that as a sign to buy this immediately. What a game changer, I'm mad I'm just now finding this stuff lol!" — _kayla_carter
Get it from Amazon for $17.77.
13. A Cerama-Bryte cooktop cleaning kit so when you look at your glass stove top, you can smile at your reflection instead of roll your eyes at the leftover grease, dried-up pasta water, and other messes that come with cooking at home. It comes with a cleaning solution, cleaning pads, and a scraper tool!
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"Love, Love, LOVE this stuff! Who else hates cleaning their stove like me?? It feels like every time I clean the stove, it just gets dirty again. Well I found THE BEST clean for your stove top. I applied this once after having oil and food caked onto my stove, and within seconds of using the cloth to clean it off, it was TOTALLY clean. Seriously, this stuff is incredible. It also comes with a little scraper which is perfect for getting those little nuggets of food off your stove. Buy this stuff..you won't regret it!" — Meredith B
Get the kit from Amazon for $13.98.
14. A fume-free oven cleaner meant to tackle the most hard-to-remove buildup from last week's dinner that you just wish cleaned itself up. No more wasting money on weaker cleaning products; this stuff is literally called Easy-Off because it easily gets all the gunk off with a simple spray and swipe. New oven, who dis?
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"I HATE cleaning my oven and this is evident by the fact that I won't do it until it fills up with smoke when baking. I bought new appliances and I was meticulous about keeping the stove/oven clean by not using them. Well, when you're a mom, that kind of doesn't work, so I made sure to not have anything splash on the stove or in the oven when cooking and to immediately clean anything that got by me. That also only lasts so long when I work long hours, so I used to tell myself, "You'll clean it tomorrow". As you all know, that's code for someday. Weeks went by, and my stove needed cleaning, and I found the handy self-cleaning button. Let me tell you, that worked....the first time. I needed professional help the second time, so of course, I put that off until I couldn't. Got on Amazon and as I always do, I read the product description and instructions and then went straight to reviews on multiple self-proclaimed "best oven cleaners". This one was the one I decided to put my hard-earned money on, and it paid off! I sprayed everything the night before, and I was ready with my gloves and mask, but I didn't need them. There was no splash back when spraying and no overwhelming smell. Got up the next day, opened the oven, and 30 minutes later, it was brand new. I was so happy, and this is my go-to. I use it about once a month and do the self-clean in between. I've used it on the racks of my little toaster oven as well and the grime comes right off. I've included a before and after cause, I know pictures are worth a thousand words." — Sandra Stephens
15. A three-part microfiber wand, which gets rid of the dust on the top AND bottom of not one... but TWO blinds at once. This comes with five microfiber cleaning towels and saves you from using up a whole roll of paper towels just for cleaning the blinds.
Amazon
Promising review:"I absolutely hate cleaning my blinds, and it was pretty obvious that I hardly ever clean them by how much dirt came off the first time I used this tool. I've only used it dry so far, but boy it sure does get the dust off of the blinds. It does still take a while to do it, even though you're doing multiple slats at a time, but it sure is a lot easier. I love that you can just throw them in the washing machine when you're done. Thumbs up!" — Dopey1200
Get a pack of one wand and five sleeves from Amazon for $6.99.
16. An automatic bleach toilet cleaning system because even thinking about cleaning the toilet makes me want to gag! This little contraption will send cleaning solution into your bowl each time you flush, making it waayyy less gross when it comes time to actually deep clean the porcelain throne.
www.amazon.com
It's super quick to install, and one cartridge can last up to three months!
Promising review:"I am a lazy cleaner, but hate filth. This is a life saver for me, because it helps keep the toilet bowl clean." — Thirsty reader
Get it from Amazon for $10.59.
17. A Clorox toilet cleaning kit that'll be the #1 product when it comes to cleaning where you go #1 and #2. Not only does this come with a wand and storage caddy, it comes with extra refills of the disposable sponges that are infused with the cleaning liquid. Plus, the release button on the wand allows you to easily throw away the sponges without actually touching the sponge!
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"Throw away your nasty toilet brush because THIS THING IS AWESOME! Tons of cleaner on the little pads; I could have cleaned eight toilets with one pad. Love that you can click and toss the used pad. Genius!" — Hannah G.
Get it from Amazon for $14.99.
18. And a reusable pumice stone so you can easily scratch away at those yucky stains without leaving behind scratch marks in the bowl. Those regular plastic bristles are no match for this strong yet gentle cleaner that makes your porcelain throne look brand stinkin' new (minus the literal stink).
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"When we bought our previously owned condo, all three of the toilets had a permanent dark ring. I must have tried at least six different cleaning products that claimed to eliminate rings. None worked. I was actually considering buying new toilets as the ring was embarrassing to me. A friend recommended the pumice toilet bowl ring remover, and I was prepared to be disappointed again. But it worked perfectly. The ring is gone on all three toilets, and it only took a few minutes per toilet. I don't know when I have ever been so totally satisfied with a product. It just saved me a whole lot of money, and I am no longer embarrassed by the appearance of my toilets." — lynn mcdonald
Get it from Amazon for $11.19.
19. A dryer vent cleaning kit you can attach to your vacuum to suck out all that excess lint that doesn't get collected by the lint trap (spoiler: it's a lot more than you think).
amazon.com, www.amazon.com
The entire set comes with a plastic hose, an adapter, and a vacuum hose for use with most any vacuum. Plus, a flexible lint brush!
Promising review:"I love this dryer lint extension for the vacuum. I wanted to try a cheaper option first before I spent way more money having someone clean the lint trap deep down. So much lint came out of my dryer, it was wild. I'm very good at cleaning it after using the dryer, but inevitably there's always more that we can't see or reach because it's too deep. It's a great way to keep it clear of lint to increase the efficiency of the dryer, which will save money from electricity and extend the life of the dryer, and prevent possible fires." — Cat L.
Get it from Amazon for $9.95+ (available in four colors).
20. A slim cleaning brush to get in those hard-to-reach places like the window and door tracks. The handle even doubles as a scraper if there's dirt that's really stuck in there. Your plain sponge could never.
Amazon, www.amazon.com
Promising review: "This is an amazing set of brushes. Don't be fooled by the low cost. The brushes are soft and long enough to get into tight spots but firm enough to hold up. They work amazing in those hard-to-clean aluminum window runners and sliding doors. I've used them to clean enclosed fan blades, refrigerator vents, etc. They wash easily and with a bit of TLC they hold their shape. Always nice to find something so simple and inexpensive that works so well." — CNJ
Get a pack of two from Amazon for $4.99.
21. A jar of *THE* Pink Stuff — it'll work wonders to remove dirt, oil, grime, rust, and stains from pretty much any surface. You'll be surprised that the ingredient list doesn't just say "magic" since it brings your things (stoves, pans, sinks, etc.) back to life with little to no elbow grease required.
www.amazon.com
Promising review: "I am speechless. I had burned on crud on the glass door inside of my oven. I literally took the product and put it on with a sponge, let it sit for 30 seconds, wiped it off with a hot watered paper towel, and it wiped clean! I regret not taking before and after pictures. I have tried everything under the sun and regret not trying this sooner. I was skeptical because I saw it on TikTok. BUY IT!!!!!! Can't wait to try it on the shower! [Best] stuff I've ever used!" — Courtney
Promising review: " This is one of those 'changed my life' products that you come across every once in a while. I have tried so many different things to clean my clear glass shower door and just end up wasting time, money, and effort. The reviews and price of this product sold me on it. I love the smell (very subtle) and I used it with a basic sponge on my shower door. It did take a little effort but not bad and yielded amazing results. I then got excited about the other possibilities and have used it on the inside of my oven door with similar results. It's great. You won't be disappointed." — Amazon Customer
Get it from Amazon for $5.97.
22. A set of cleaning brush attachments you can attach to a drill for some serious scrubbin'. If you've ever broken a cleaning brush scrubbing with too much elbow grease, this is the thing for you. Your back will thank you, your bathroom surfaces will sparkle, and you will be so thankful cleaning took half the time it usually does.
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
Promising review:"I've been eyeing these for a few months and finally caved... Man do I regret not picking them up as soon as I saw them! They work GREAT! We rent an apartment that has a 30+-year-old shower/tub. I've used everything from abrasive powders, gels that sit, to most recently the bathroom Magic Erasers and nothing really got the grime out. These WORK and they work fast. Ten minutes with my handy drill and the shower has never been cleaner. I love that I don't have to throw money out on cleaning products anymore and that I can be a little more environmentally friendly with no waste and no chemical cleaners! Just a little dish soap, baking soda, and a spin of the brush. If you're on the fence, just buy them!" — Becky Adie
Get a set of three from Amazon for $18.95 (available in six color and stiffness levels).
23. A professional-strength grout cleaner because the white grout you chose to go with your white tile is now somehow very, very dark. 😣 Revive your grout with this solution, which comes with a flip-top cap for accurate application and no wasted product!
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"We moved into our house a year ago and I've been on a quest to clean the grout next to the stove ever since then. I've tried everything — store products, DIY solutions, Pinterest recommendations, you name it. As a last resort, I got this and holy cow! I left it on for three minutes as a spot test at first, and I could already see a huge difference. I then did two more rounds letting it sit for five minutes each. The scent's not bad, it was fine if I had the window open, it was just being down close to it that got me. Seriously, stop looking and buy this." — Britney Phillips
Get it from Amazon for $21.95.
24. A stainless steel cleaner and polish to remove fingerprints, watermarks, and any other residues that get on your stove, oven, or other stainless steel appliances. And this comes with a microfiber towel for buffing!
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
Promising review: "I have tried lots of products for cleaning stainless steel appliances and this one is the best. Doesn't streak and makes my appliances look like new. Easy to use, just one or two swipes with the microfiber cloth needed. Leave the product in the cloth and use for touchups." — Debbie Escobar
Get it from Amazon for $17.98 (available in a multipack).
25. A pack of duster sponges that might just be dust's worst enemy. All you gotta do is dampen it, wipe, and rinse! The ridged surface grabs all that grossness and it's reusable, which is way more eco-friendly than using wasteful paper towels.
www.amazon.com
Promising review: "This product is amazing! It makes cleaning so much easier and takes way less time! I used to hate cleaning my baseboards, but this product has made cleaning it so easy that I actually don't mind doing it anymore! It is also great for blinds as well! Definitely worth it!" — Julia
Promising review: "I rarely review products, but this little sponge literally changed my life! It picks up EVERYthing in one swipe! Hard water marks on your bathroom mirror, no problem! Hair clippings on your sink and counter, one swipe and they are gone! Dusty blinds? Swoosh, swoosh, swipe! And ala-presto ka-bam, like magic, they are perfect and dust-free! I just need one of these for my floors! I love, love, love how the sponge picks up everything, and with a little running water, all the dust, hair, muck, and guck just rinsed away! This will not disappoint! Thank you!" — DayDreamer
Get a set of four from Amazon for $8.49 (available in six color packs).
26. A length-adjustable pet hair broom to sweep up all that dog hair, human hair, and random dust that camouflages itself on your patterned rugs. But really, this works for any type of floor and will leave you stunned at how you and your pets aren't bald by now.
Emma Lord / BuzzFeed, www.amazon.com
Want more info? Check out my coworker's FURemover Evrilholder broom review. You'll learn a thing or two AND enjoy some very satisfying hair-removal photos!
Promising review:" I saw this on TikTok and thought it was worth a shot. I have two dogs and a cat, and being one with a dust and dander allergy I have to vacuum often but the vacuum can't always get in deep enough. This actually works and I was shocked at how well it does. I brush the carpet a few times and vacuum it up and the carpet even looks better!! I highly recommend this to everyone — especially pet owners." — Theo Ackerman
Get it from Amazon for $15.99.
27. A touchless stationary vacuum because no matter how many times you try, the dustpan is never gonna get 100% of the dirt you collected. This lil' guy is super convenient and relieves you of having to go back and forth to the trashcan after sweeping.
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
An indicator light will turn on to let you know that the canister is full, and then you can remove the canister and dump the debris in the trash.
Promising review:" I absolutely love this magic floor sucker. I live in the Rocky Mountains with four large dogs and two cats. It makes sweeping not so bad and much more manageable. You just sweep it to the vac and it sucks it up. LOVE IT." — MaryKat
Get it from Amazon for $149 (available in three colors).
28. A multipurpose, portable steamer so your floors, furniture, windows, ovens, and basically anything you can think of can be brought back to life. This comes with 17 different attachments making it great for small crevices and larger surface areas. Win-win if you ask me!
www.amazon.com, www.amazon.com
Promising review: "I rarely write product reviews because I'm usually underwhelmed. But this steam cleaner deserves accolades! First, the description and advertising is spot on. It delivers what it promises. Secondly, it is easy to use, compact for storage, and has a large tank capacity, allowing me to clean the majority of my luxury wood vinyl floors and bathroom tile. Thirdly, quick heat up, great accessories to meet all cleaning situations. Best of all, its consistently powerful steam gets the job done quickly. My floors never looked so good!" — Craig
Get it from Amazon for $149.77.
29. Grandma's Secret, which is basically like a washing machine in a bottle! Who cares about Victoria's Secret... the only secret I wanna know is what is in this little bottle that does miracles for getting out hard-to-tackle stains and messes. Just apply and let it sit for 5–10 minutes and wipe away!
www.amazon.com
Promising review:"This stuff is so amazing. I'm a witness. My 2-year-old baby wrote all over my white leather couch. I tried multiple different things and nothing work but Grandma's Secret Spot Remover. I love this stuff." — L. Nix
Get a pack of two from Amazon for $9.99.
30. An MVP-worthy pet urine stain-removing spray to revive your carpets and furniture into the stain-free beauties they once were. All you gotta do is spray, let it sit for 5–10 minutes, blot, and let it air dry! Yes, you love your fancy little pooch, but you don't love the number she does on your carpets.
www.amazon.com, Amazon
Rocco & Roxie Supply Company is a family-owned small business established in 2013 that specializes in pet odor eliminators, pet toys, pet snacks, and pet accessories.
Promising review:"I don't know how I ever survived without this. There's tons of 'pet stain/odor remover' products out there, but this by far is the absolute best. I cringed paying the $20 for it when others are between $5–$10, but I have NO ISSUES paying now. I foster dogs, some puppies, some older, some not house broken and every room in my house is carpeted except the kitchen which means I have lots of accidents. I spray enough to saturate if it's a lot of urine, let it soak for 10 minutes then wipe it up with a hand towel. Then I put a larger towel on top of it if it's in a high-traffic area until it's completely dry. It's taken out every stain and more importantly the odor is gone! I will never stop buying this product. I recommend it to everyone who has dogs!" — Shelley

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The Left Must Reclaim Motherhood
'I had no idea how much you loved being a mom,' my best friend said one day at a park meet-up 15 months after my son was born. At that point, I'd been parenting for over a year, and yet, I'd somehow forgotten to tell her how much this new life-altering experience had meant to me. In fact, one of the first things I decided after my son was born was that I wouldn't write about him or motherhood. I'd felt unable to describe the mixture of joy, rage, love, and exhaustion that consumed me because of it. More accurately, it took me years to feel comfortable with the idea that parenting wasn't a frivolous topic, and 'mother' was a word I actually wanted to be associated with. Since then, there have been other moments of motherhood dissonance. I've found myself baking a cake from scratch (which, for the record, has never turned out quite right!) or cooking a meal for my family, feeling happily domestic, when a suspicious sensation takes over, as if I might turn into a milkmaid-dress donning homesteader who has abandoned all her progressive ideals. But is enjoying cooking food for people you love a conservative endeavor? And why did it take me so long to feel ok to share my experiences as a mother? Sure, I never dreamed of becoming a parent when I was growing up, and I saw the suburbs as a heteronormative hellscape. But it's more than that—recently, it's because the cultural chasm surrounding motherhood has widened, largely because of politics. On one side of the political spectrum, conservatives have adeptly rebranded motherhood as a sanctified identity—stylized, nostalgic, and tightly wrapped in traditional values. From the rise of tradwive s, to the rise of the pronatalist movement, to the homeschooling revival, conservative motherhood has become not only a lifestyle but a political aesthetic. Decorated in gingham and pastels, with references to "simpler times," right-wing influencers have woven a narrative where motherhood is both an ideal and a coveted aesthetic—one that often valorizes the nuclear family, eschews public institutions, and distrusts science. Meanwhile, the left has engaged in a vital act of exposing the harsher and heavier realities of parenting. From economists like Emily Oster and writers Jessica Valenti and Angela Garbes (to name a very few), we have been shown the truth about the gender wage gap's impact on parenting, the way maternal mortality disproportionately affects Black women, and the imbalance of cognitive labor that mothers bear. Social media accounts like TikTok's @momunfiltered share stories of messy motherhoods detailing the exhaustion, the inequity, and the lack of social safety nets. These accounts have helped to destigmatize these experiences and have revealed how parenting in a country with no universal childcare, inadequate maternal healthcare, and no guaranteed paid leave becomes an act of survival for many. This truth is essential—especially in a culture that punishes mothers while feigning reverence for them. But amidst this necessary reckoning, depictions of joy and meaning have been lost. As a queer, progressive mother of two, I know this conflict intimately. I've noticed how quickly I'll make a joke about the stress of parenting, but hesitate to share when something about it feels deeply good. There's a subtle sense that taking pleasure in domesticity might be a betrayal of my values—as if nurturing children, or even enjoying something as benign as baking, plays into oppressive tropes. But why should the right own parenting and caretaking? I was most struck by the recent headline of feminist philosopher Kate Manne, who wrote a piece titled 'Don't Have Children,' where she described her daughter as her greatest joy, but simultaneously wrote that she hopes to never become a grandmother. Is that the best we can offer children and young people in our country, which is rich in money, technology, advanced medical treatments, and resources? This complete give-up cannot be the only solution. . In our efforts to dismantle the idealization of motherhood, the left has struggled to articulate a more complex view of caregiving—one that acknowledges the labor, yes, but also celebrates the connection, creativity, and sometimes radical meaning that comes with raising children. It has also left out a vision for what caregiving has the potential to be under the right leadership. As the conservative right makes motherhood its ideological stronghold, the left risks ceding not just the narrative, but the cultural and political power that comes with it. What would it mean to embrace motherhood not only as a struggle but a site of potential joy and creativity? Our elected officials could, in theory, make positive change should they choose to take on caretaking in a meaningful way. We've seen it happen elsewhere: In 2024, for instance, the UK passed a law attempting to help specifically working and low-income families by allowing access to free childcare for up to 15 hours per week for children nine months and older, and up to 30 hours for three and four year olds. This past April, Singapore added four weeks of mandatory paternity leave (other countries, including Sweden, Japan, and Norway have similar policies), which has the ability to jump-start more equitable caretaking for both parents early on. This does not solve all the issues that come with parenthood, but it's certainly a start. Leftist activists are fighting for childcare funding, reproductive justice, and equitable family leave policies. There are growing grassroots childcare collectives popping up, like Rad Dad Zine and the Parenting for Liberation network, which both model the use of mutual aid, intersectionality, and bring joy to the forefront. During the COVID-19 pandemic, we saw families lean on each other for pod schooling and collaborative use of resources. Despite these boots on the ground movements, we don't see our elected Democratic officials take these needs on in a meaningful way that would put people over profits. The left doesn't need to replicate the tradwife stylings, however relaxing and visually appealing it seems, but it does need its own vision—one that affirms the possibility of caregiving without erasing the hardship. To reclaim motherhood, the left must do more than critique. We must dream and share what caregiving could look like in our world of more than plenty. We must push our elected officials to champion meaningful public policies like universal childcare and paid parental leave. I've also realized that I can do a better job of making more visible the joy and radical meaning that comes not despite caregiving, but because of it. I have become more vocal in claiming the title of mother and discussing the varying ways motherhood has changed me for the better. Above all, since all moms feel so differently about each stage, day, and moment, I try to make sure that I am just sharing my point of view. Motherhood and joy are not inherently conservative. It's time for the left (and me) to reclaim this truth—and with it, to imagine a future where parenting is not a battleground but a common ground.
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Her Father Died in 2002. Her Toddler Says She Knows Where He Is, and That He's Missing Her (Exclusive)
A 2-year-old told her mom, 'Your daddy is missing you,' while pointing to the hallway — referring to a grandfather who died two decades ago The video, captured in a now-viral TikTok, brought back memories of similar childhood moments for the mom herself Chyanne J. says the peaceful feeling from the experience changed how she thinks about connection, grief and the afterlifeFor Chyanne J., an ordinary morning turned extraordinary when her toddler daughter calmly insisted that her late grandfather was standing in the hallway. The moment, caught on video and shared to TikTok, quickly captivated millions. 'My daughter kept telling me to come here, and I was cleaning up or whatever, and that's when she said, 'Your daddy's here,' ' Chyanne J. tells PEOPLE. 'In the beginning of the video, when I first started recording, you can hear her say, 'It's daddy.' And I asked, 'Is it your daddy, or is it my daddy?' And she said, 'It's your daddy.' ' The clip captures the moment Chyanne's 2-year-old daughter points down the hallway, insisting that her grandfather — who died in 2002 — is right there. She then tells her mom, 'Your daddy's missing you.' At first, Chyanne says she was flooded with disbelief. 'It was panic when she was telling me, 'It's your daddy. He's right here,' ' she recalls. The shock deepened when she realized her daughter was talking about someone she never met. 'It kind of hit like, okay, my dad has obviously passed, so, you know ...' she says. Trying to process the moment, Chyanne asked her daughter to point out exactly where he was. 'She said, 'He's right here,' and then added, 'Your daddy's missing you,' ' she shares. 'It was emotional, but I was so caught off guard that I didn't even process what really happened until afterward.' This wasn't the first time her daughter had made a mysterious claim like this. Months earlier, she had suddenly refused to sleep in her room. 'I knew something was wrong, because it was almost like she was afraid,' Chyanne says. 'We were asking her, 'What's wrong?' and she said, 'There's a ghost.' ' In an effort to ease her fear, Chyanne showed her a photo from her wedding day where a family member had edited in her late father. 'She lit up,' Chyanne remembers. 'I think seeing me in the photo with him comforted her, because she knew this was nothing to be afraid of.' Her daughter began calling him 'daddy ghost' and started talking about him as if he were her friend. 'Another time, she came up to me and said, 'The ghost sees me,' and took me to her bedroom and told me it was my dad,' she says. 'If the first two things were crazy, this one — where she said he's missing you — was the craziest.' What makes the moment even more interesting is that Chyanne never spoke to her daughter about her father. 'One of the main things people ask is, did she know him? No,' she says. 'She didn't know him at all.' Chyanne was just 2 years old when her father died, the same age her daughter is now. 'I remember certain things, but mostly the relationship I've built with him is through stories from my family,' she shares. It was a familiar experience for Chyanne, who says she had similar encounters as a young girl. 'My family always talks about how I did the same thing — talked to my grandfather and to my dad after he passed,' she explains. 'They absolutely believed me when I told them what was happening.' Her grandmother, especially, encouraged her to nurture her daughter's gift. 'She told me, just keep encouraging her and believing in her,' Chyanne says. 'Don't make her feel scared or like she's crazy — just say, 'Yes, baby, he's here,' and go on.' While the experience was startling at first, Chyanne says she ultimately "felt very calm and peaceful,' she tells PEOPLE. 'We walked into her room and everything just felt okay,' she continues. 'There was no panic, nothing to be scared of — I could feel that it was okay.' Moments like this have changed how she thinks about life and what comes after. 'I do love to think that we will get to visit our loved ones when we pass,' she says. 'It makes me a little more excited for what's to come.' The viral response has been overwhelming but mostly supportive. 'About 85% of the comments are people's personal stories, like, 'Please believe her, this happened to me,' ' Chyanne says. 'It makes me feel not so like, 'Oh my God, why is this only happening to me?' ' Some commenters were skeptical, but the outpouring of heartfelt experiences far outweighed the negativity. 'A lot of people even messaged me about how they help their children or grandchildren with something similar,' she says. 'That's been helpful too.' Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. Chyanne describes her daughter as unusually articulate and bright for her age. 'She's the smartest 2-year-old. I went to college for early childhood development, and she blows me away,' she says. Her daughter talks like an adult, understands sarcasm and even tells jokes. 'Everybody's like, 'Did she just say that?' And she absolutely did,' Chyanne adds. Although life has been busy, Chyanne hopes to bring her daughter to visit her father's grave soon. 'Every time we've tried, something came up,' she says. 'But now I really want to take her out there, especially since she understands so much.' For Chyanne, the moment captured on TikTok was more than a viral sensation. 'It was the first time I ever felt like I got to talk to my dad,' she says softly. 'And that means everything.' Read the original article on People