Former detective slams authorities and says they 'failed' in Jay Slater inquest
Mark Williams-Thomas, who has worked on some of the world's most high profile missing persons cases, has set the record straight on a key question surrounding Jay Slater's inquest
A former British Police detective has set the record straight on why key witnesses didn't attend Jay Slater's inquest and slammed authorities because of it.
Jay is believed to have gone to an Airbnb apartment in the early hours, and then subsequently vanished and was reported missing on June 18. His body was found in a steep and inaccessible area by a mountain rescue team from the Spanish Civil Guard near the village of Masca on July 15.
Shocking new details and eyewitness testimony has emerged about the Jay Slater case - including his last conversation with a friend before he went missing on the Spanish island of Tenerife. The new details have been shared by investigator Mark Williams-Thomas in a two-part podcast.
In a video posted on X yesterday Mark says: "One area I do want to clear up is this issue around the inquest, so there was a lot made about the witnesses not turning up. Let's be really clear, the witness didn't turn up because most of them, this isn't all of them but a number of them, simply didn't get warned.
"What happened is that the coroner, the police, they set up the inquest at the very last minute, there was no pre-warning to people... which they had the time to do, but they didn't. They didn't because they were worried about the amount of coverage the Jay SLater disappearance has had and the amount of anger and venom that's been around - particularly from people on social media.
"So, therefore as a result of that they thought they would call it at the last minute well the consequences of that is that the witnesses were away. They weren't around, they weren't warned properly. So this isn't a failing of witnesses not turning up, this is a failing of the authorities, the coroner, the police to fail to do it properly."
In the podcast Mark says the key to knowing why Jay, 19, ended up in the north of the Spanish island of Tenerife, far away from his accommodation, was easy to understand. A post-mortem found Jay had consumed alcohol and drugs in the hours before he fell down a ravine. His disappearance on June 17 triggered a massive manhunt before his body was discovered on July 15 last year.
Mark-Williams added: "Jay was still buzzing at 6am from the alcohol and drugs but his friends wanted to go home, so when Qassim (a friend) told Jay that he could go back to theirs and continue partying he jumped at the chance."
An inquest into Jay's death was adjourned after his mum Debbie plead for more witnesses to come forward. She said: "We want these people to be sat in front of us, because our son went on holiday and didn't come back, so there's questions we need to ask."
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Daily Record
an hour ago
- Daily Record
Whereabouts of Jay Slater's friends revealed after witness appeal during inquest
Several of the 19-year-old's friends failed to turn up for proceedings. Friends of tragic teen Jay Slater have been tracked down after failing to appear at an inquest into his death opened in late May. The 19-year-old was found dead last year, a month after he went missing following a night out in Tenerife with friends on June 17. The night before he disappeared, he stayed with two men in a rented Airbnb, who spoke to local and British press about him. Lucy Law, Bradley Hargreaves and Brandon Hodgson also gave statements to the media. However, they did not turn up at the inquest, which was temporarily halted after Jay's mum issued a desperate plea to locate them, the Mirror reports. Some of them have been found, with the Daily Mail reporting their last known whereabouts as the inquest is due to resume, with several tracked down abroad. Lucy Law, 18, was one of two friends who travelled to Tenerife with Jay from Lancashire last year, and helped launch early search efforts, assisting his family when they arrived on the island. In an emotional tribute when his body was found, she wrote: "Always the happiest and most smiley person in the room, you was one of a kind Jay and you'll be missed more than you know. "I'm sure you'll 'have your dancing shoes polished and ready' waiting for us all. We all love you buddy. Fly high." She also went to Jay's funeral, but failed to appear at the inquest. She is said to have returned to Tenerife for a holiday, according to her stepfather, who added she was also away when she was called to give a witness statement at the inquest earlier this hear, as her family were not aware it was ongoing at the time. Another friend from home who travelled alongside Jay was Bradley Hargreaves, who regularly spoke to the media after searches got underway. The day Jay went missing, Bradley was sent his location, putting him in the small village of Masca. His tribute when Jay's body was found read: "Nothing be the same without you. Rest easy brother. Love you always." He did not appear at the inquest either, having told the coroner's office he would be away on a holiday booked in October, believed to be in Greece. Brandon Hodgson was the third friend Jay went to Tenerife with, and was one of the last people the teen spoke to before he disappeared. Investigator Mark Williams-Thomas said Brandon, now 20, had got a text from Jay which read: "I've started walking". Brandon said: "He was laughing at first, then he sent me his location. On the phone he said to me 'I've been walking for half an hour', I told him to go back and he said, 'I've already been walking for half an hour, I'm not going back, I don't want to go back, I just want to go home." He is now said to be "liaising with police" after officers went to his home in the lead-up to the inquest with a witness summons, but did not get an answer. It has been established he is also abroad, in an undisclosed location. Join the Daily Record WhatsApp community! Get the latest news sent straight to your messages by joining our WhatsApp community today. You'll receive daily updates on breaking news as well as the top headlines across Scotland. No one will be able to see who is signed up and no one can send messages except the Daily Record team. All you have to do is click here if you're on mobile, select 'Join Community' and you're in! If you're on a desktop, simply scan the QR code above with your phone and click 'Join Community'. We also treat our community members to special offers, promotions, and adverts from us and our partners. If you don't like our community, you can check out any time you like. To leave our community click on the name at the top of your screen and choose 'exit group'. If you're curious, you can read our Privacy Notice. Ayub Qassim, another British man but not one of Jay's friends, had invited the teen back to his Airbnb in the village of Masca the night before he went missing. The convicted drug dealer, also referred to as "Johnny Vegas" had let him stay overnight, and claimed he told him he would drive him back after the teen said "this woman told me I can get a bus every 10 minutes". Mr Qassim told Mark Williams-Thomas: "I told him that he's mad, there's no bus that's coming here every 10 minutes, chill out for a bit and I'll drop you off later on. "He said, 'No, no I've got to go to Los Cristianos, I need to scram, I need to chip out'. There's nothing more that I could do. The Metropolitan Police attempted to serve a witness summons at his last known address in Barking, East London, but were told by neighbours that he now lived abroad. Steven Roccas, known as "Rocky" was staying with Mr Qassim at the Airbnb, but little more information is known about him beyond this. He kept his head down while Mr Qassim explained his last contact with Jay, and his identity was only revealed at the inquest. The Met Police had also tried to serve a summons at his London address, but found he no longer lived there before tracking him to a business using an email address he had given Spanish police. However, the premises was shuttered, having reportedly been closed for three years, and Mr Roccas has still not been traced.
NBC News
5 hours ago
- NBC News
How a city in Nebraska is recovering after the state's largest worksite immigration raid
Immigration The city of Omaha is trying to forge ahead following the raid's chilling effect on the local workforce and the community at large. June 15, 2025, 6:00 AM EDT By Nicole Acevedo OMAHA, Nebraska — Every seat in the waiting area of Glenn Valley Foods was occupied with people filling out job applications early Thursday afternoon, two days after the meatpacking plant became the center of the largest worksite immigration raid in the state of Nebraska so far this year. Dozens of prospective employees, many of them Spanish speakers, had been coming in and out of the plant all day. Some were hoping to land a new job; others were coming in for training. The scene gave the company's president, Chad Hartmann, a glimmer of hope amid the chaos that ensued after Tuesday's raid purged roughly half of his staff — many of whom had been longtime employees of the company, which has been processing boxed beef for more than 15 years. Hartmann had never seen or experienced a raid before. He is finding out in real time that 'there's no playbook' on how to move forward after one, Hartmann told NBC News. The process of re-hiring new workers, Hartmann said, feels like asking someone to replace a family member. 'You cannot, in my mind,' he said. 'They were part of our family, and they were taken away.' Seventy-six people working at Glenn Valley Foods were arrested by federal immigration authorities Tuesday morning, the Department of Homeland Security told NBC News in an email. Immigration and Customs Enforcement said the arrests were part of an enforcement operation to execute a federal search warrant in connection to an investigation into ' the large-scale employment of aliens without legal work authorization.' As of Friday night, criminal charges had not been filed against those arrested in the raid. About a dozen of them have already been deported or transferred out of state. At least 63 others were taken to the Lincoln County Detention Center. The county's sheriff, Jerome Kramer, said none of the detainees are 'violent offenders' and he hopes to help them 'complete the process to correct their work status and reunite them with families or employers.' Samantha Santiago, who owns a business selling accessories in South Omaha's predominantly Latino business district, said many of the detained people were her customers. 'There are just too many families who were affected,' she said in Spanish, adding that some of people in the community canceled " quinceañeras" and baptisms planned for this weekend because 'the sadness is too deep.' The raid happened on the same week John Ewing officially took office as the first Black mayor of Omaha. Ewing, a Democrat, defeated Republican incumbent Jean Stothert in last month's election. At the same time, anti-ICE demonstrations have been raging across the nation in cities like Los Angeles, Seattle, New York and Philadelphia — protesting the tactics being used when conducting raids and immigration enforcement actions. 'It's a collective effort, as a community, to both mourn together and also try to find solutions together for everybody,' Douglas County Commissioner Roger Garcia, the first Latino to occupy that position, told NBC News. Douglas County, where Omaha is located, is one of just two counties in Nebraska that went blue during the 2024 presidential election. The state as a whole is largely considered a Republican stronghold. Nevada Gov. Jim Pillen, a Republican, issued a statement in support of the raids and signed a proclamation Friday to activate the National Guard as a precautionary measure ' in anticipation of anti-ICE protests ' this weekend. In a news conference Wednesday, Ewing said that he does not support workplace raids and Omaha police would not, as a normal course of business, ask people about their immigration status. The dueling points showcase the source of nationwide tensions as Americans grapple with President Donald Trump's actions to fulfill his campaign promise of mass deportations. On Friday, over 500 people protesting Omaha's immigration raids peacefully marched to Charles Schwab Field, where the College World Series — the city's biggest sporting event — was kicking off. 'It is big for tourism in Omaha,' Juan Elizondo, one of the protest's lead organizers, told NBC News. 'The nation here with us — being there present, and letting them hear us, I think is more impactful.' A diverse crowd of demonstrators, from children and young people to older adults, were mostly dressed in white to show peace, though a handful of them even dressed in work uniforms to symbolize immigrants' contributions. Most of them held signs, upside down American flags signaling distress and Latin American flags to represent some of the people's heritage. Dozens of other people driving by honked at the demonstrators and placed flags outside their car windows to show support. The march marked the first time Elizondo, 32, had organized a protest. As an Omaha native and a son of Mexican immigrants, Elizondo said, he felt compelled to step up after he saw that the main message of the protests across the nation was being marred by instances of violence. 'This is definitely an extreme moment in the community,' he said. 'It's gotten a lot more political.' Reeling from the aftermath News of the ICE raid this week sent a crippling, chilling effect across the city. The local library and community college closed early on Tuesday. Construction sites and other workplaces have been desolate. South Omaha's business district, known as a vibrant Hispanic and immigrant enclave, shut down immediately after the raid. As of Friday, some had reopened. About a third of the remaining staff at Glenn Valley Foods showed up to work on Wednesday, with many staying home because they still felt afraid or traumatized, resulting in a roughly 20% drop in production that day, according to Hartmann. As more of the remaining employees showed up Thursday morning — most still reeling from the stress caused by the raid — workers and employees held a meeting. Hartmann described the meeting as a combination of 'tough love' and even passionate disagreements, as people tried to make sense of what happened and find a way to move forward. About 80 employees were at the plant processing meat early Friday afternoon. At the South Omaha business district, a popular Mexican bakery reopened Friday and welcomed dozens of customers taking home pastries for Father's Day weekend. Three hair stylists sat outside their empty salon. They said this weekend tends to be busy for the business, but many of their immigrant customers were not coming in because they were still afraid to be out in public following the raid. Santiago was back at her store Friday after taking a couple of days to process what was happening around her. During those two days, Santiago said she would cry unprompted 'every five minutes.' To find comfort, she went to church and prayed. Scrolling on social media, Santiago saw GoFundMe pages, raffles and other efforts to raise funds for the families affected by the raids. She said some are struggling to afford legal fees and immigration attorneys as well as keep up with family expenses without their spouse's income. Looking for a way to help, Santiago had the idea to take a portion of the proceeds from her bestselling item — the popular Labubu dolls — and donate them to the affected families. Commissioner Garcia's family is among those directly impacted by the raids. His wife's aunt was among the 76 people who were taken into immigration custody. Her son was able to speak with her on Wednesday at around 1 a.m. and learned she was being taken to an immigration processing center in Omaha. Currently, she is at a state detention center elsewhere. 'A lot of these individuals have been here for many years, if not decades, raising a family here, have citizen children and family members here, and they don't fit that profile of being the high-level criminals that are supposed to be the priority for immigration enforcement,' Garcia said. Grappling with a system that 'needs to be repaired' Wrapping and loading boxes of product into trucks, processing meat, maintaining the intricate machinery and repairing and cleaning the plant: these are some of the jobs, Hartmann said, that workers at Glenn Valley Foods do to ensure the meatpacking plant passes strict Safe Quality Food audits and inspections from the U.S. Department of Agriculture. Hartmann explained some of these jobs require rigorous safety training; 'it takes skilled people that take pride in what they do,' he said. The company's president said they have continuously used E-Verify as part of their hiring process. The system is operated by the Department of Homeland Security in partnership with the Social Security Administration to let employers know if a prospective employee has legal authorization to work in the U.S. Every employee at Glenn Valley Foods, including those who were detained by ICE, has been approved through E-Verify, Hartmann said. When he told this to DHS during the raid, an agency official described the system they operate as flawed and easy to cheat. Now, as he hires a new workforce, Hartmann has no other alternative but to continue using E-Verify system to screen employees, he said. 'That system doesn't capture a solution if somebody's got a fake ID. That's what needs to be repaired.' Garcia said that limiting immigrants' ability to remain in the country legally is what often pushes people to 'borrow' or 'make up' false identifications. It is for the 'sole purpose of working and nothing else, because there has been no other way for them to adjust their status and work under their own proper name or identification.' 'But our comprehensive immigration reform efforts have not gone through yet, unfortunately. And it's still badly needed,' García said. In researching alternatives for E-Verify with guidance from Rep. Don Bacon, R-Neb., DHS and federal authorities, Hartmann said the options he was presented included temporary work visa programs such as H-1A — meant for industries dealing with workforce shortages — and H-2B, for nonagricultural jobs. But because these immigration programs are for seasonal workers, 'it doesn't fit our needs,' Hartmann said. Saying goodbye to workers every six months is 'not building a business.' Hartmann wishes government officials would consider creating a limited period of amnesty for undocumented people who 'meet certain qualifications' such as never having committed a crime, a desire to work, pay taxes and be part of the community. This could be a temporary remedy for people looking to get legal immigration status, he suggested. While that might not be the answer to the larger immigration issue, he said it's 'some version that makes sense.' 'There should be no problem with that,' Hartmann said, 'to just stop the bleeding, stop the problem.' A new generation of residents speak out Elizondo organized Friday's protest with the help and support of other more experienced Latino and immigrant rights advocates. A group of them met on Thursday afternoon at a downtown Omaha restaurant to plan the demonstration. They shared advice on how to work with local law enforcement to ensure the protests remained peaceful and focused on how immigration raids are hurting their communities, the community activists said. 'That has made the new generation speak up,' Rosa la Puente, one of the advocates mentoring Elizondo, said about the recent events. Many in the community are questioning the timing of the Omaha raid, wondering if the city was targeted for political reasons. When asked about this at a news conference on Wednesday, Ewing said, 'I don't know why Omaha was targeted.' For young Omaha residents like Elizondo and Jennifer Reyna, 29, the issue feels personal. Elizondo said he was inspired to step up after he saw his mother's leadership, consoling co-workers at James Skinner Baking, a local baking manufacturer, who were paralyzed with fear following the raid. 'It breaks your heart,' he said. Reyna, who attended Friday's protest, said they want their voices heard beyond Omaha. 'Everyone at this point in time in the community is afraid and is extremely upset,' Reyna said. Amid a feeling of helplessness, "we're trying to live normal, hardworking lives in this country that we do love,' she said. Nicole Acevedo Nicole Acevedo is a national reporter for NBC News and NBC Latino.
Scottish Sun
6 hours ago
- Scottish Sun
We had to launch Mission Impossible-style hospital escape to bring my boy home to die – I won't get over the trauma
Teddie's mum is campaigning for more access to grief counselling - see her petition below CATCH ME IF YOU CAN CATCH ME IF YOU CAN We had to launch Mission Impossible-style hospital escape to bring my boy home to die – I won't get over the trauma Click to share on X/Twitter (Opens in new window) Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) A TEENAGER with just days to live was forced to evade security guards as he fled through a hospital, before jumping into a getaway car - just so he could die at home. Teddie Marks, 18, was wheelchair-bound, with his legs swelled up from cancer but was able to show off his athletic prowess one last time during the comedic mad dash. Sign up for Scottish Sun newsletter Sign up 15 Teddie Marks died from a rare and aggressive cancer Credit: Jay Marks 15 Teddie with his heartbroken mum Jay Credit: Jay Marks 15 The teen was forced to flee the hospital Credit: Jay Marks Mum Jay - who is campaigning for more access to grief counselling for bereaved families - explained how everything had been put in place to allow her son to receive palliative care at the family's home in Braintree, Essex. However, at the last minute, as they left University College London Hospital they were confusingly told Teddie had to stay, against his wishes. Security was called and they were to be blocked from leaving - but the adventurous young man was having none of it. Mum-of-three Jay, 42, said: 'He's 18, they got all his paperwork ready, they gave us all his medication, they said to us he was going to be blue-lighted because from UCLH to Braintree it's a bit of a drive. 'Then they said they were going to get a normal ambulance but I would have to sign responsibility for him, which was fine… then we're told that's been cancelled.' Jay continued: 'In the end, the palliative care nurse fitted him up with a 24-hour pump so that we could get him home and hook him up to the machine.' 'That makes no sense' The family then got into a lift on the 15th floor with the palliative care nurse, alongside a 'bag of medication' and all of Teddie's things from weeks of being in and out of hospital - when they hit another speed bump. 'On the way down she had a call and she was like 'right okay', then she said 'they've called security',' explained Jay. 'We were like what? That makes no sense because she was with us and he'd been discharged. 'Teddie was an adult and sound of mind, and he'd told them he wanted to go home.' The symptoms of sarcoma cancer including tummy pain Not wanting to stick around to find out what was going on, Teddie, who was being pushed in a wheelchair, as well as his mum and dad Joseph, and two other relatives, bolted. 'When the lift doors opened on the ground floor we ran, we were gone,' said Jay. 'We were literally running through the hospital and the nurse was shouting 'stop!' 'They didn't catch up to us, and poor Teddie, he jumped in the car, bearing in mind his legs were all swollen, he had lymphedema where the fluid wasn't going back upwards because of where the tumour was sitting. You've never seen him move so fast. He jumped out of the wheelchair, jumped in the car and went 'drive!' Jay Marks 'You've never seen him move so fast,' continued Jay. 'He jumped out of the wheelchair, jumped in the car and went 'drive!'' Joseph's two aunts, who had been with them at the hospital, stayed behind and later told the family the nurse burst into tears. 'She was crying and she was saying 'I'm happy they got to go' because it wasn't her that had called security - it had been higher up,' explained Jay. 'They'd already given him his discharge papers and everything we needed, it made no sense. It's funny to look back on now, what everyone else must have been thinking.' 15 Teddie was just 18 when he passed away Credit: Jay Marks 15 Jay and Teddie as a toddler Credit: Jay Marks 15 Teddie (centre) with his sister Robyn and brother Harrison Credit: Jay Marks That was on July 12 2024 and on the 14th Teddie finally passed away. It had been a tough journey since his shock diagnosis at age 16 in 2022 with Rhabdomyosarcoma, a rare type of cancer that starts as a growth of cells in soft tissue. 'It's quite rare but quite aggressive, and it tends to come back even if you get rid of it,' explained Jay. 'He did have a six-month period when he got rid of the cancer, and then he relapsed in July 2023, and then we've had a long battle.' Trips to Germany The family was told there was nothing more the NHS could offer and so they spent tens of thousands of pounds, via GoFundMe, to travel to Germany multiple times - the last of which was days before Teddie died. 'We'd been seeing different professors that had tried different treatments,' said Jay. 'Unfortunately, the last professor we tried, he was having some success, and the month after that treatment, Teddie was feeling much better. 'All the swelling in his legs had gone down, he was feeling much better, but by that time the cancer had spread and we didn't catch it.' Teddie knew he was dying as he'd flown to Germany the last time, but didn't want to give up. 'His words were 'I'm not going to die without trying',' said Jay. 'He was fighting the whole time.' Asked if he'd been able to get alternative treatment sooner she believes her son could have survived, Jay said: 'I think so. The NHS will say 'no, no' but they are so ignorant to what is out there in Europe, it's unbelievable.' 15 Teddie was a talented footballer Credit: Jay Marks 15 Jay described him as the 'perfect' child Credit: Jay Marks 15 The teen was originally diagnosed with cancer in 2022 Credit: Jay Marks After Teddie relapsed in March 2023 he was given an operation and it was 'made clear' by the consultants that they'd 'tripled checked' with the surgeons that Teddie's cancer could be removed with 'clear margins', said Jay. 'Because if it couldn't they weren't going to touch it. They said 'the surgeons are really sure'.' 'After the operation, as soon as Teddie came round, he said 'did you get it with clear margins?' and they said 'we can't be sure'. 'It must not have been checked properly,' Jay said. 'When he had scans four to six weeks after the op, nodules had appeared. 'I think at that point if we'd gone to Germany, Teddie would have stood a better chance.' £100,000 in 24 hours The GoFundMe page set up to help the teen receive alternative treatments 'went over £100,000 in the first 24 hours', said Jay. 'GoFundMe got in touch to say they had never seen one go up that quickly.' All of that and more went on private testing and treatments abroad. 'I can't sit here and say don't listen to the NHS because overall they were amazing, but it's frustrating that there are these treatments out there,' said Jay. 'Don't get me wrong, the hospital was amazing, especially the nurses who go above and beyond.' 15 Teddie playing video games in hospital Credit: Jay Marks 15 He battled cancer bravely for two years Credit: Jay Marks 15 Teddie even passed his driving test while he underwent chemo Credit: Jay Marks But with all other hope lost, with the help of Farleigh Hospice, in Braintree, Teddie was able to die in the comfort of his own home. 'He knew what he was going home for,' said Jay. 'It was absolutely heartbreaking because you know you are saying bye to your child. 'We sat up every night. He had his family here, his aunts, his uncles and his cousins. 'Don't be depressed' 'At one point, Teddie said 'don't be depressed, put some music on',' she added, laughing. Teddie had always been the one to keep the family's spirits up, even throughout his illness. 'He was such a good boy,' said Jay. 'There were days after he got diagnosed where I couldn't get up, couldn't function and he would come in and say to me, 'up you get, Mum'. 'He had such strong faith, he was quite religious - even when Teddie was dying, he had all the family here and was cuddling his girl cousins and he said 'don't cry for me, I know where I'm going.' 'That boy was absolutely something else.' Teddie had first been getting pain in August 2021, and by November he was 'in agony' and 'was up three or four nights straight', said Jay, who took him to A&E multiple times. However, they were sent away again and again and told to take over the counter painkillers. 15 He didn't let cancer stop him from remaining positive Credit: Jay Marks 15 Teddie was even joking with his family on his death bed Credit: Jay Marks 15 University College London Hospital, where Teddie was treated Credit: The Sun Jay said Teddie was 'very robust', he was captain of Chelmsford City EJA, but even his pain threshold was being pushed to the limit. Eventually, the family paid for a private doctor and MRI scan, then an operation which found abscesses. The doctor sent off for a biopsy at UCLH and then a week later a phone call confirmed the worst. 'It was during lockdown so everything was a bit dodgy,' said Jay. 'I got told over the phone that Teddie had cancer and was given a treatment plan.' During his treatment Teddie refused to stop, and passed his GCSE Maths and English - the latter to an A* standard - while undergoing chemotherapy. And even passed his driving test. But while his memory lives on, Jay is still as heartbroken now as she was a year ago. 'You can't prepare yourself' 'You know it's coming but you can't prepare yourself,' she said of her son's death. 'I can't put it into words, it's coming up to a year but I'm still devastated every day. Me and his dad, brother and sister, and his nan. There's not a day that goes by that we don't cry.' She added, of her children: 'They'll always be my babies.' Taking up the baton left by Teddie, his mum is now campaigning herself to raise awareness about the wait times families must endure to receive grief counselling. After filling out a form she was told by the hospice the waiting list is nine to 12 months. Jay said: 'Last week I had an email from Farleigh saying they've got this session thing, it's not one to one counselling, there's other people there. 'There's 10 spaces and to get back to them if I wanted a place. 'I saw the email, 40 minutes later, by the time I got back they'd emailed me saying all the spaces had gone.' Jay said she had another email from the hospice asking since it was a 'considerable amount of time since I put my application in for counselling, have my circumstances changed?' 'They did get an email back saying 'my circumstances haven't changed, unfortunately my son hasn't risen from the dead, I'm still grieving and still in need of support'. She continued: 'It's not going to change. I just can't get my head round that it can take this long to sort… any grief is bad, but when you've lost your child, I can't explain it. It's unexplainable.' Jay went on to say: 'I said to my doctor, 'they're lucky I'm not suicidal'. If he was my only child maybe I would be suicidal but I have two other children who I need to look after. It's not going to change. I just can't get my head round that it can take this long to sort… any grief is bad, but when you've lost your child, I can't explain it. It's unexplainable. Jay Marks 'I carry the family's grief. My daughter, her and Teddie were 10 months apart - she's got ASD, so she's on the spectrum, and Teddie was her comfort blanket. 'She struggles really badly. Then my eldest son, who's 23 now, he will just struggle silently. 'I feel like I have to carry on because I don't want them to see my grieving and think they've got to carry my grief.' She added: 'I do feel passionately that there are parents going through this and you have to wait a year. We can't go privately. 'My husband sold his company when Teddie got diagnosed because we were backwards and forwards to UCLH. He's a caretaker now and I'm a support assistant in a school.' Jay said: 'I've lost people but nothing compares to losing your child, especially when you've watched your child go through what he did for two and a half years. 'You get a lot of flashbacks, I'm sure it's PTSD. You're replaying stuff continuously. It's traumatising when you hear your baby, though he was 18, in the night screaming in agony. 'It's traumatising to remember the running from the hospital, the taking him to Germany when he was in agony.' She described Teddie as 'my best mate', adding: 'I know parents say that about their kids but he was like my right arm. 'He was always with me, we were always together. We had the same sense of humour. We were always laughing. 'No one could get you in tears of laughter like Teddie could. For me, I'm still completely lost.' Michelle Kabia, Interim Chief Executive at Farleigh Hospice, said: 'Ensuring that the families of our patients receive the best quality support throughout their loved ones illness and afterwards is our absolute priority. "Our bereavement support services are offered free of charge to anyone within mid Essex. "As a result they are in incredibly high demand, as reflected in our current waiting lists, which we are actively working to reduce. 'We regularly stay in touch with people on the waiting list to check how they are, offer interim bereavement support options while they wait for one to one counselling, and check whether their circumstances have changed, as people may have accessed alternative support or moved out of the area. "We welcome all feedback and are continually looking to improve our services. We would be very happy to have a further conversation with the family.' The Sun has also approached University College Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust for comment Click here to see Jay's grief counselling petition. Do you have a similar story? Email
