Nicola Sturgeon opens up on suffering miscarriage and reveals 'I always felt it was a girl'
The former first minister admitted she still carried a "sense of guilt" following her miscarriage as she felt "conflicted about the pregnancy".
Nicola Sturgeon was speaking with ITV News
(Image: ITV News)
Nicola Sturgeon has spoken in emotional detail about the miscarriage she suffered at the age of 40 in 2010.
Speaking on a primetime ITV News interview tonight, the former first minister admitted she still carried a "sense of guilt" following her miscarriage as she had felt "conflicted about the pregnancy".
Sturgeon, who was then serving as deputy first minister, suffered a miscarriage on December 30, 2010 and spent the morning of Hogmanay at the early pregnancy clinic at Glasgow Royal Infirmary with her husband Peter Murrell.
Speaking to ITV News presenter Julie Etchingham, the ex-SNP leader said: "To this day and possibly forever, I carry a sense of guilt that I miscarried the baby because I had been conflicted about the pregnancy. It was very close to the 2011 Scottish election, the SNP would be going for reelection.
"I would've been six months pregnant at the time. Will I be able to cope?
"I still carry a bit of that guilt. If I had been genuinely happy with the pregnancy, if I genuinely wanted it unequivocally and unambiguously, if I hadn't had all those moments of wishing I hadn't been pregnant, would I, would the miscarriage not have happened?
"Was that my punishment for not, and it's totally irrational. I get how irrational that is."
The MSP, who stands from Holyrood next year, continued: "I was in the toilet. And I'm not gonna get into the graphic detail, buteffectively, and I've heard other women describe it like this as well, I, I managed to call Peter through, and effectively we flushed what would've become our child down the toilet."
Etchingham responded: "You vividly imagined this baby that you lost, who she was. Just tell me that bit that you wrote about her?
Sturgeon added: 'I always felt it was a girl. I can see her in my mind's eye. Dark hair, dark eyes.
"She'll be 14 now. Um, so it's, it is a bizarre thing for somebody who I've never had that overwhelming maternal yearning.
"I don't feel incomplete because I don't have a child. And yet that little girl, I can totally conjure up in my mind and still feel, feel a sense of loss over her and guilt. She's a part of, of my story."
Article continues below
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Times
8 minutes ago
- Times
Nicola Sturgeon's memoir rewrites history with confidence
Nicola Sturgeon's memoir has claimed independence from factual accuracy. The book, Frankly, is littered with small errors, such as the former first minister's claim that the reconvened Scottish parliament of 1999 contained more women than had ever been elected to Westminster. This could not have been achieved even if every single MSP had been a woman, but it evaded a fact-checker's pen. Other mistakes are more personal. Sturgeon recalls how, after wiping out all bar one of the Labour MPs in Scotland in 2015, she boarded a flight for London to wild applause. She even claims that Tom Harris, one of the defeated MPs, was there looking on. 'It isn't true,' said Harris, who was confused with another ex-MP. 'What is the point of the anecdote in the first place other than to crow … about a defeated opponent?' Harris said. 'Stay classy, Nic.' This would be another example of Sturgeon's self-proclaimed emotional intelligence. It's three strikes and you're out for Jeremy Hunt as he insists he will not seek the Tory leadership again. The former chancellor told The Rest Is Politics that his wife 'would have something to say' if he ran a fourth time, which left one of his hosts very upset. 'I'll encourage you to think again,' said the banished Conservative Rory Stewart. 'You're the one person who would make me rejoin the Conservative Party and come in behind you.' Good news for Mrs Hunt — the Stewart endorsement is more fatal than hemlock. Among the cast of The Thick of It, the actor Alex Macqueen was a politics nerd sans pareil. The man who played the blue-skies thinker Julius Nicholson once worked as a tour guide in the Houses of Parliament, which he said was 'a Disney cruise liner for politicos'. However, this analogy only works if Mickey Mouse's ship was a little unseaworthy. 'It was a luxurious place to work,' Macqueen told Times Radio. 'But I know there are regular fires that break out and it needs a bit of TLC.' Oh, it all shambles along — the nice thing about the fires in Westminster is that they're soon put out by the leaks. The comedian Jimmy Carr is still paying for past mistakes. Carr, who is the Ken Dodd of his generation, though not when it comes to the comedy, is doing two shows a night on his current tour. 'One show at 7pm and one at 9.30pm,' he explained. 'One for me and one for HMRC.' Carr's career survived revelations about his tax affairs, which is good for him as he loves the work. Asked by an audience member in Bath if he would do his job free, he said: 'Probably. In fact, I think that effectively happened once when the tax bill came in.' The chat show presenter Graham Norton spends an awful lot of time saying nice things about people, and this can come back to bite him. He recalls that a friend was once raving to him about a book so much that she promised to get Norton a copy. He was excited, but when the book was delivered the friend informed Norton that he'd already read it. 'No, I haven't,' he said. 'I don't remember anything about this book at all.' When he then picked up the novel, he saw his name on the cover. It was beneath the quote 'Unforgettable characters'.
Scottish Sun
an hour ago
- Scottish Sun
Nicola Sturgeon's 10 biggest bombshell moments in full from new memoir
Click to share on X/Twitter (Opens in new window) Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) MS Sturgeon's book Frankly hit the shelves this week as the former First Minister hopped from TV studio to radio station promoting it ahead of the official release. Our reporters got hold of a copy and have waded through all 446 pages of the memoir to find the stand-out revelations from the ex-SNP leader so you don't have to. Sign up for Scottish Sun newsletter Sign up 12 Nicola Sturgeon's new book has several sensational claims Credit: PA 12 The book features personal confessions to bombshells from her political career Credit: PA From her visits to Balmoral to meet the Queen to her view on her own destiny, here are some of the best bits. The Queen THE late Queen asked for 'gossip' from Nicola Sturgeon about the sexual misconduct scandal engulfing the SNP, she claims. The ex-SNP leader said Queen Elizabeth immediately asked for details about the sexual harassment claims against Alex Salmond after they emerged in 2018. 12 She claimed the Queen wanted gossip on Alex Salmond Credit: PA:Press Association Ms Sturgeon said the Queen 'loved a bit of gossip' and asked about the case at an audience at Balmoral Castle in 2018 which she visited with husband Peter Murrell. And she wrote: 'She asked me about it almost as soon as I sat down. She wasn't being trivial in any way, she wanted to know more of what was going on. 'I think she was also trying to put me at ease.' She also told how at Balmoral, Prince Philip would cook her and hubby Peter Murrell barbecues, with the Queen packing leftovers into Tupperware. Sean Connery NICOLA Sturgeon wrote that she was trained to speak with more 'authority' by Sir Sean Connery. The late James Bond actor gave the ex-Nats leader voice coaching in 2004 around the time she was elected deputy leader of the SNP. She wrote how the pair met at the glitzy New Club in Edinburgh where he advised her to deepen her speaking voice. Nicola Sturgeon admits mistake on gender ID battle in bombshell TV interview She said: 'There I was, under the instruction of 007 himself, pacing up and down the library of the New Club, with a folded piece of paper between my teeth, repeating sentences chosen, it seemed, for their particular combination of syllables, consonants and vowels.' 'My voice slowed and deepened. 'The trick, in future, he told me, was that whenever I wanted to project authority I had to speak as if I had a piece of paper between my teeth.' 12 She said Sean Connery trained her to speak with more authority Credit: Getty Prince William THE future King finds himself on the receiving end in Ms Sturgeon's memoirs. She wrote that 'almost all' of her interactions with Royals have been 'positive', saying: 'I know it is part of their 'training' ('breeding is probably the more accurate term), but they are always engaged and engaging, polite and courteous.' 12 She admits feeling aggrieved towards Prince William Credit: Getty But she writes that after a 'cordial' meeting with Prince William in Edinburgh in 2021, she found out he'd held a separate private chat with ex Labour Prime Minister Gordon Brown during the same trip to Scotland. And this was the 'one occasion when I had cause to feel slightly aggrieved towards a senior royal'. She wrote that a comment from the Prince's office on the reason for meeting Mr Brown 'was, to put it mildly, disingenuous', adding: 'The thrust was that he had wanted to talk to politicians from across the political spectrum, obviously meant as code for both sides of the independence debate.' Ms Sturgeon also moans in the memoir that she 'couldn't get a break' after news that William and Kate were expecting their first child overshadowed a 2012 speech she made on independence. Eco legacy SCOTLAND'S reputation as a global leader on climate change is in danger of being 'squandered', Nicola Sturgeon claims. In a thinly veiled swipe at her SNP successors, the former first minister insisted 'every new oil or gas field under exploration sucks in money, labour and expertise that should be devoted to developing and deploying green alternatives'. She said: 'We were well and truly on the map as a climate pioneer…unfortunately, it's a position I fear Scotland is now in danger of squandering.' 12 She reckons Scotland's rep as an eco world leader is being squandered Credit: Getty Ms Sturgeon said 'north Sea reserves are running out' and 'Within just a few years, production will be a tiny fraction of what it is today'. First Minister John Swinney ditched Sturgeon's 'presumption against new exploration' shortly after taking office last year and backed new fields that meet 'climate compatibility and energy security' criteria. In April, he said: 'There is no hostility in this Government to oil and gas. 'We are committed to a rational transition to net zero that enables us to fulfil our climate objectives. We will have to rely on elements of oil and gas for some time to come.' The Lockerbie Bomber THE release of the Lockerbie bomber could have spelled the end of Nicola Sturgeon's career and the fledgling SNP government, the former first minister revealed. Ms Sturgeon claimed she was not involved in the controversial decision to free Abdelbaset al-Megrahi in 2009 and only learned about it from BBC's Newsnight. 12 Ms Sturgeon claimed she was not involved in the controversial decision to free Abdelbaset al-Megrahi Credit: PA And she said Alex Salmond washed his hands of it too despite being obsessed with Scotland's image on the world stage – and left the decision to then Justice Secretary Kenny MacAskill. Ms Sturgeon recalls bereaved constituents who lost loved ones in the attack informing her that they would see the release of Megrahi a 'betrayal of their loved ones' memories' and she says she did not support his release or transfer. She said: 'The opposition could have united to bring us down, but they didn't. I could have resigned, given my deep misgivings, and I did consider it. But I opted instead to accept collective responsibility.' Indy promise SCOTTISH nationalists' insistence that the 2014 referendum would be 'once in a generation' was 'a warning not a promise', Nicola Sturgeon has claimed. The former SNP leader, who was in charge of referendum strategy during the campaign, said repeatedly that an independence referendum was a 'once in a lifetime' event. 12 She claims she wrote much of Scotland's Future, the independence white paper, single-handedly Credit: Alamy Ms Sturgeon said she wrote much of Scotland's Future, the independence white paper, single-handedly with little help from Alex Salmond. "The opening paragraph said the referendum was a 'once in a generation opportunity to follow a different path'. In her book, she admitted these comments 'came back to haunt her' when she pushed for a second referendum just three years later. She said: 'Our opponents claimed it meant that I was going back on my word. In their shoes I might have done the same, but it was a gross misrepresentation. 'Once in a lifetime / generation' was a warning, not a promise. I hadn't said I would never argue for another referendum.' School bullies BULLIES beat up Ms Sturgeon at primary school where she was targeted for being a bookworm, she says. Ms Sturgeon writes that she was 'occasionally bullied' and 'always felt different' and she 'worried that people would think spending hours with my head in a book was a bit weird'. She said there were some girls with 'dominant personalities' in her class who ended up 'battering' her on two occasions after school in Dreghorn, Ayrshire. 12 Ms Sturgeon told how she was beat up in primary school Credit: Getty She wrote: 'They followed me down Dreghorn Main Street, taunting me all the way with what was about to happen and then, just before I was due to turn into my street, one of the girls, who was tall, heavyset, and who weighed much more than me, jumped on my back and pummelled me with kicks and punches. 'The first time it happened, I kept it from my mum and dad, but the second time, one of my other classmates ran to get them. 'My parents then complained to the school and the girl got into trouble. Even though I wanted the bullying to stop, I remember being mortified that my mum and dad had got involved.' Ms Sturgeon said that as a result, she's now 'instinctively drawn to anyone who might be struggling to fit in'. 'Gnasher' jibe A MALE MSP who repeatedly called Nicola Sturgeon 'Gnasher' will remain anonymous as he would 'enjoy the notoriety', the former First Minister said. Ms Sturgeon said she was 'subjected to some nasty bullying' in the early years of the Scottish Parliament by a male MSP of another party who called her the name to others and even to her face. 12 An MSP in Holyrood referred to Ms Sturgeon as "Gnasher" Credit: PA:Press Association She said: 'At first I didn't understand it.' But she said that eventually, she 'discovered that it was a reference to a story being spread around that I had once injured a boyfriend' during an intimate moment. Ms Sturgeon said she 'cried in the toilets in the Parliament' when she heard the story but his behaviour escalated. She wrote: 'I can still visualise the gleeful sneer on his face. He seemed to revel in my discomfort and I became quite scared of him.' Ms Sturgeon said in an interview yesterday that she would not name the MSP as 'he would enjoy the notoriety'. Her 'destiny' THE ex-First Minister claimed she realised as a child it was her'destiny' not to be 'ordinary' in life. She wrote: 'From as far back as I can recall, I didn't just have an ambition to go to university but, rather, a certainty I would do so. 12 She claimed she realised as a child it was her'destiny' not to be 'ordinary' in life. Credit: PA:Press Association 'No one else in the history of my family had ever studied for a degree, so it is hard to know where that came from. In fact, back then I was a walking contradiction. 'Alongside shyness, a crippling lack of confidence and fear of failure, was a burning ambition, a drive to succeed, a craving to be 'seen'. 'I had - at risk of sounding daft a very strong sense of 'destiny'; a feeling that whatever I did would not be 'ordinary', that it would attract attention." The future THE United Kingdom will completely dissolve in less than 20 years and the monarchy will be gone within a century, Nicola Sturgeon claimed. Writing at the end of her autobiography, she said: 'I predict that in 20 years, perhaps sooner, the UK in its current form will no longer exist. What will emerge in its place will be stronger, healthier and more democratic. 12 She reckons the UK will be dissolved in 20 years Credit: Alamy 'An independent Scotland, a more autonomous Wales and reunified Ireland will join England, enjoying the benefits of the home rule it will gain as a result, in a new British Isles confederation of nations.' She added the death of Queen Elizabeth II in 2022 was 'the beginning of the end' of the British Royal Family. And yesterday, she said in an interview: 'I'm not saying it will be ten, it could be 100 years. 'But…over time perhaps the absurdities of monarchy will start to come to the fore much more without the personality of the Queen to keep it going.'
Scottish Sun
2 hours ago
- Scottish Sun
Nicola Sturgeon launches furious defence of gender crusade – just days after hinting at climbdown
Click to share on X/Twitter (Opens in new window) Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) NICOLA Sturgeon sparked a fresh war with feminists, including JK Rowling — just days after saying she wished she'd paused her gender crusade. The ex-First Minister hit out at critics and said her position on self-ID 'hasn't changed'. Sign up for the Politics newsletter Sign up 4 Nicola Sturgeon launched a defence of her gender crusade Credit: BBC 4 She insisted her position on self-ID hasn't changed Credit: Splash 4 It comes after the former SNP leader admitted mistakes in her handling of the party's gender laws Credit: Getty 4 She took a swipe at JK Rowling who then hit back Credit: EPA But her comments were slammed by women's rights campaigners, who said the former SNP leader 'still doesn't get it'. It emerged that Ms Sturgeon's new book, Frankly, includes a blast at JK Rowling. It accuses the Harry Potter author of stoking 'vile' attacks on her following a social media post in October 2022 in which she wore a T-shirt that had a definition of Ms Sturgeon as 'destroyer of women's rights'. The politician claimed the stunt was 'the point at which rational debate' on the trans issue 'became impossible and any hope of finding common ground disappeared'. Ms Sturgeon said the description of her 'wounds me deeply', adding that the personal attacks that followed 'made me feel less safe and more at risk of possible physical harm'. Ms Rowling hit back as she posted photos of her penning notes in the book. The billionaire novelist said: 'Watch my website for my review of Frankly, the memoir of Scotland's (checks notes) most persecuted, misunderstood, self-critical, open-to-debate, feminist-to-her-fingertips ex-First Minister.' Ms Rowling highlighted a passage about the #MeToo movement. In her book, Ms Sturgeon wrote: 'We have such a long way still to go to make the public sphere safe for women and girls.' Ms Rowling shared a picture of the page where she had written: 'Are you f*****g kidding me???' Nicola Sturgeon admits mistake on gender ID battle in bombshell TV interview Earlier, the ex-Nats supremo was asked in a BBC interview whether she'd debate trans rights issues with the author. She eventually said: 'I'll debate with anybody,' adding, 'I don't think JK Rowling would be willing to do that.' Ms Sturgeon was also criticised by For Women Scotland, the group behind the legal case which ended with the UK Supreme Court's landmark ruling that 'woman' in equality law means 'biological woman'. Campaigner Susan Smith said: 'She still doesn't get it. 'Nicola Sturgeon wrings her hands now about the tone of the debate but she refused to meet women, including in the SNP, to talk through valid concerns. 'The failure of this policy is on her and we are only sorry that she put many women through hell before we got here.' Ms Sturgeon also refused to say sorry for pushing the Gender Recognition Reform bill through Holyrood. "I will never apologise for standing up for the rights of one of the most stigmatised minorities in the country." Nicola Sturgeon Speaking to BBC Radio 4's Today programme she said: 'The assault we're seeing on trans people now, which goes way beyond debates about the process of gender recognition, is appalling. 'I will never apologise for standing up for the rights of one of the most stigmatised minorities in the country.' The bill was passed by MSPs in December 2022 but the then-Tory UK Government blocked it from becoming law. The proposals stripped away protections around trans rights, including the need for a medical diagnosis before people could legally change sex. It planned to lower the age limit from 18 to 16. The former First Minister had appeared to make a climbdown in an ITV interview on Monday, saying she should have 'paused' it due to feminists' concerns. But she insisted: 'My position hasn't changed.' She conceded only that her communication skills had 'deserted' her — particularly around the case of trans double rapist Isla Bryson. There was fury after the fiend, previously called Adam Graham, claimed to be transitioning and was initially sent to a female nick in January 2023. Ms Sturgeon finally said on ITV she considered Bryson a 'biological male'. But she claimed anything she said about the monster would be 'taken to apply to every trans person'. She said: 'We deal with the bad people — we don't taint the entire group.' Scots Tory leader Russell Findlay said it was clear Ms Sturgeon had 'not moved one inch'. He said: 'She still believes any man should be accepted as a woman regardless of the impact on women's rights.' Elsewhere in her book, Ms Sturgeon claimed Alex Salmond had been 'implacably opposed' to moves to legalise gay marriage — until she convinced him.
