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Yahoo
an hour ago
- Yahoo
Woman Cancels Family Getaway After Brother Mocks Her Generosity. Then He Asks Her for Money
After saving up to treat her family to a special weekend getaway, a young woman canceled the trip when her older brother mocked her motives and belittled her generosity in front of everyone The family was left disappointed by the canceled plans, but tensions rose further when the same brother who ridiculed her later came to her for financial help Standing her ground despite family pressure to "be the bigger person," she refused his request, sparking a conversation about respect, boundaries and the true meaning of generosityA woman is turning to the Reddit community for support after a heartfelt family gesture took an unexpected turn. At just 19, she began working full-time before college and used her savings to plan a special weekend cabin getaway for her family, covering all the expenses herself. 'I paid for everything and was excited to spend time with them, especially since I don't usually get to do something big like this,' she shares in her post, highlighting how much the trip meant to her. But things took a sour turn at a family dinner just one week before the big event. Her older brother, 24, started making jokes at her expense, accusing her of 'trying to buy everyone's love' and 'showing off with bakery money.' His girlfriend joined in the laughter, leaving her feeling embarrassed and hurt in front of the people she cares about most. 'I just sat there embarrassed,' she admits. After dinner, she confronted her brother and told him his words hurt, but he dismissed her feelings, and told her she was being dramatic. So she made the decision to cancel the trip. 'I didn't want to spend a weekend being made fun of for trying to do something kind,' she explains, standing by her choice even as her parents expressed disappointment. Her brother, however, didn't see it the same way and told everyone she 'ruined the trip for no reason.' This only added to her frustration, as she felt misunderstood and unfairly blamed for trying to set boundaries. Time passed, and the situation took another twist when her brother, after making poor financial choices, came to her for help. He apologized, but she questioned the sincerity of his words, feeling the timing was 'super convenient.' She decided to say no to his request for money, leading to more tension within the family. 'Now he's calling me selfish and got my parents pressuring me to 'be the bigger person,'' she reveals. Turning to Reddit, she asks, 'Am I overreacting for standing my ground? I didn't ask to be treated like a joke.' The community has responded with overwhelming support, validating her feelings and encouraging her to prioritize her own well-being. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. One commenter reminds her, 'Your money, your rules. You aren't an ATM, and respect isn't bought, it's earned.' Echoing the pain of being ridiculed for her efforts, the poster replied, 'Right?? And it's my hard earned money that's supposed to pay [for] the getaway. It just hurts me that he had to make fun of it." Another voice in the thread offers wisdom: 'You're absolutely right, respect can't be bought, it has to be earned. Setting boundaries and knowing your worth is key to any healthy relationship.' Read the original article on People
CNET
2 hours ago
- CNET
Ever Thought You Could Smoke Meat in an Oven? This Chef Proves You Can
There's something irresistible about the deep, smoky flavor of meat that's been slow-cooked to perfection. From brisket and ribs to turkey and ham, smoked meat brings bold, rich flavor to everything it touches and makes any meal feel like an occasion. But if you don't have a backyard smoker or pellet grill, you might think it's out of reach. The good news is you don't need fancy equipment to get that same smoky depth at home. With a few easy techniques, you can bring smokehouse flavor to your kitchen using just your stovetop or oven. Whether you're prepping for a summer cookout or want to level up your next dinner, here's how to smoke meat without stepping outside. Tim Cottini, executive chef of Chicago's Bub City, whom I met at the annual Windy City Smokeout, is an expert in imparting smoke into all types of proteins. I tasked him with walking us through the steps it takes for any amateur cook in need of assistance. How to smoke in an oven or stovetop Smoking in an oven or on a stovetop is not out of the realm of possibility. In fact, all you need is some wood chips to achieve the desired flavor. Safety first Don't try this method unless your kitchen has proper ventilation including an exhaust, windows and additional fan. gerenme/Getty Images Because you'll be cooking inside, it's recommended to keep it to a light smoke so you don't set off all the fire alarms and compromise your home's air quality. What's cooking the food is low and slow heat, but this method adds a waft of smoke to impart flavor to the ribs, brisket or chicken inside. Also, you'll want to ensure you have excellent ventilation in the kitchen with an exhaust fan, windows and possible added fans to manage the smoke. If you do it right, the smoke shouldn't become unbearable, but always be prepared for the worst. Cottini's top tips to for smoking meat in an oven Applewood chips are a popular pick for savory foods such as salmon and ribs. Getty Pick your wood chip. "For the type of wood chips, it's really a matter of personal taste but for chicken, I like applewood or cherrywood. With pork I like hickory or mesquite chips. Brisket and beef go best with hickory." Opt for higher fat meats. "Meats higher in fat with lots of connective tissue, like pork shoulder, brisket, leg of lamb, ribs, and pork belly, absorb smoke flavor best. As these meats cook, the intramuscular tissue breaks down and the fat incorporates the smoky flavor. Cooking these meats low and slow, for multiple hours, will make sure that the flavor deeply penetrates the meat and makes the most of the fat rendering process. Lean meats work as well but they need to be cooked quicker to avoid them drying out." Season and marinate your meat but first determine if it's going to be a dry or wet brine. "For the dry method, apply your favorite spice rub directly on the meat's exterior, like a dry rub on pork shoulder. At Bub City, we let it sit for 4 to 5 hours before cooking to allow the seasoning to permeate the meat, which then gets amplified during cooking as the fat renders." Combine stovetop and oven cooking for maximum flavor. "On a stovetop, get the wood chips smoking on one side of a deep pan [on high heat for about five minutes], then place a 2-inch perforated pan over them with the meat in it, but offset from the [location of] wood chips. Cover both pans with foil and smoke. "Do it this way [for 10-30 minutes on medium-low heat, depending on the size and type of meat] to add the flavor without overcooking it. Then, remove [the meat] and finish cooking it the rest of the way in the oven, on the grill, or even in a slow cooker Always smoke the meat indirectly. "This means that you should put your wood chips on one side of your heat source and position the meat opposite it so that it's not directly over the smoking chips." A simple brine will help seal that smoky flavor inside. Ry Crist/CNET "If you want to do a wet brine, it depends on what type of meat you're smoking," Cottini says. "If you're doing smoked chicken for pulled chicken sliders, for example, I'd recommend brining for 24 to 48 hours, and then letting it air-dry for 24 hours before seasoning the exterior with a salt-sugar-spice rub mixture. That will ensure that the chicken develops a tackiness so your seasoning adheres properly." Step four can be tailored to the type of meal you're preparing. Cottini says that lean meats and fish can be made quickly (sometimes in as little as 5-10 minutes depending on filet thickness) or you can transfer proteins like pulled chicken to a slow cooker for a low and slow cooking process that will maintain the initial smoke infusion. Leaner meat and seafood will need less time to absorb the smoky flavors of your woodchips. Alaskan Salmon Company "You can also brush your items with sauce and and then finish in a broiler to get a nice glazed, lacquered finish and char," he adds. No matter the meal, keep the no-contact rule in mind when it comes to meat and wood chips. They should never touch so that the flavor is merely a whisper and not a full-fledged assault to the tastebuds.
Washington Post
2 hours ago
- Washington Post
What do we really know about man's best friend?
Post readers write about their relationship with their dogs. And the president and CEO of the ASPCA shares how we can protect them. Regarding Clive D.L. Wynne and Holly Molinaro's June 1 op-ed, 'If dogs' emotions seem simple, it's because humans have them all wrong': Copper is one of our older dogs, and we've had her since 2011. In her younger years (and mine, too) she was my running buddy. She even ran half-marathons with me. She was always a little mouthy, and she seemed to bark whenever she felt like we weren't including her in the conversation. Spending so much time with her, I always felt like I knew exactly what she was feeling. However, last year, she had to have her rear leg amputated. This made moving around challenging for her, and she barks even more to communicate her needs. I try really hard to understand her, but sometimes it takes me a few tries to ascertain what she wants. It is interesting observing the other dogs when she gets frustrated communicating to me because they seem to try to soothe and support her. I don't know if they get it or if they are just as befuddled as I am. Either way, we are all doing the best we can together. Stephanie McCaslin, La Plata, Maryland It's incredible that, as Clive D.L. Wynne and Holly Molinaro's June 1 op-ed noted, dogs have learned to read humans much better than we can read them. One emotion I think I understand in my dog is disappointment. If we don't respond when he wants to play and brings us a toy, he will just lie down. We interpret it as dejection. We also think that the shivering and whimpering he does as we approach doggy day care is excited anticipation, not fear, because he jumps out of the car into the waiting leash of the caregivers without a look back at us. Maggie Symington, Rochester Some years ago, I was walking on a beach with my Labrador, Fury. He has now passed on to heavenly beaches, but he used to love running about and sniffing the wonderful fishy smells. This beach was well known for the tide coming in without warning, so you'd be walking on firm sand and suddenly come across a soggy bit, which I feared because of my bad hip. As the tide sought to trap me by my shoes, I felt deep concern as I knew I would fall, and it would be difficult to get back up. Fury came up beside me, and I put my hand on his collar, and he led me to dry sand where I could walk easily again. Immediately after, he took off running again, wagging that wonderful tail. I was stunned by his help, as I had not understood before how in tune he was with my emotions. Let's face it: If I'd been walking with a person, I would have had to ask whether I could latch on to their arm for support. I also realized how clever Fury was at behaving in such a knowing and empathetic way. No trainer could have taught him that trick. Patricia Burbridge, Dublin Story continues below advertisement Advertisement The way I communicate with my dogs, I believe, is very common among observant owners. Benji, our small, 2-year-old goldendoodle, is our third dog, and he is very expressive. He has a goldendoodle girlfriend, Callie, whom he likes to visit and roughhouse with a few times a week. He has a variety of interactions with each of the 23 dogs who live on our street, and I believe that I can tell when he is happy, nervous or disinterested in his encounters with those dogs. His downward-dog position is an invitation to roughhouse, so I prepare myself for wild chasing. His tucked tail, rounded back and slinking movements show me he is nervous. So I speak to him softly to reassure him and leave the encounter quickly. There are times when I can tell he would rather move along sniffing than engage with another oncoming dog, and he communicates that by raising his head and turning away from the other animal. When he is really interested in meeting a new friend, he will sit down and wait for the dog to reach him. He also has definite ideas about the direction in which he wants to walk, and he balks if I walk in 'the wrong direction.' He will plant his paws and pull backward. We negotiate the direction with a pocketful of treats, and he either deigns to go in my preferred direction, or I give in and follow his lead. Ellen Jacobs, Westmount, Quebec When we brought our dog home, we had to spend some time getting to know each other. We had another dog at the time who happened to be our dog's biological uncle, and we watched their relationship grow as well. I put our new puppy through extensive training, and she earned her good canine citizen certificate. I believe I can usually read her, but I also recognize that without a mutual language, I might get it wrong sometimes. Though, to be fair, we often get confused with interpreting human emotions or feelings, even with words! While thinking about the studies Clive D.L. Wynne and Holly Molinaro mentioned in their June 1 op-ed, I wonder whether dogs have a dominant paw the way humans have a dominant hand. If that is the case, I think that our puppy is left-pawed. I wonder whether there has been research into that possibility, and, if so, would that affect how her tail wags when communicating her emotion? Eric Pittelkau, Springfield I pay a lot of attention to my dog, so I've learned a lot about him. He is a border terrier, a very smart breed, and I sometimes think he's just as smart as I am. Lately, I've been worried about how he reacts to the way I communicate to my elderly husband. My husband's hearing has been getting worse, and, because he doesn't like wearing his hearing aids, if I want to talk to him I sometimes have to almost yell. I have noticed that my dog likes to lie in the bed he came with when we rescued him four years ago — even though he has other beds. And I have also noticed he knows many more words than he did when we rescued him. He also seems to think about food a lot. Connie Davis, Pardeeville, Wisconsin My relationship with my dog is still evolving. I've learned a lot from Turid Rugaas's book 'On Talking Terms with Dogs: Calming Signals,' which explains what it means when dogs lick their mouths. The licks are quick, often almost imperceptible, and for comfort. Watching my dog lick for comfort has caused me to modify my actions with her. I pay attention and stop whatever I'm doing that I may not have otherwise understood causes her discomfort. I will say that licking her chops for food is very different and definitely a happy sign. Going forward, I will now also watch the direction of her tail, even though it's docked, which might make deciphering which direction it wags difficult. Dianne Holley, Austin Story continues below advertisement Advertisement No more puppy mills Americans love their dogs. According to the Pew Research Center, a whopping 97 percent of us view our pets as family members. But as Jennifer McCartney discussed in her June 16 online op-ed, 'The 'puppy farm capital of Europe' changed a cruel practice. So can the U.S.,' many of our beloved animals come from horrific puppy mills, where dogs are viewed as dollar signs, not pets. It is a system built on deception and cruelty, designed to create big profits. And in the United States, it's completely legal. The good news is that we've made tremendous progress in the past decade in shutting down the puppy mill pipeline. Localities across the country are barring the sale of such dogs in pet shops, but pet stores aren't the only outlet for puppy mills. Slick websites with cute photos and empty promises of humane care can provide a convincing facade for cruel puppy mills. Buying a puppy? Then I suggest you meet the puppy's mother. This helps ensure that the puppy comes from a safe environment and that the breeder treats the dogs humanely. It's that simple. And though members of the public can do their part by being informed consumers, we also need better legal protections for these dogs. Goldie's Act, which was recently reintroduced in the House, could help do just that. No dog deserves to suffer, and Goldie's Act could be the lifeline that animals in these cruel facilities need. Congress should pass it now. Matt Bershadker, New York The writer is president and CEO of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. Many people are unaware that the adorable puppies sold in retail stores often come from puppy mills, where their mothers and fathers can be severely abused. Luckily for the animals, several states and hundreds of cities and counties have banned the sale of commercially bred dogs in stores. As public awareness grows, I hope this trend continues. The existence of puppy mills is one of the reasons we have a severe dog overpopulation problem in America, which leads to hundreds of thousands of dogs being euthanized in shelters every year. I encourage readers who have room in their hearts and homes to visit their local shelter or rescue group. They'll be amazed at how many wonderful canines of all sizes, shapes, ages and breeds are ready for a home. Jennifer McCartney suggested in her June 16 online op-ed that people only buy from 'responsible breeders.' But why buy a dog when you can rescue one? Until the overpopulation crisis is addressed, 'responsible breeder' is an oxymoron. Adopt, don't shop! Stewart David, Las Cruces, New Mexico
