Couple Whose Love Story Went Viral Had Decided for Years Not to Get Married — and Then One Day, She Proposed
Mandy Len Catron went viral for an essay for The New York Times' Modern Love in 2015
Ten years later, she has married the man she wrote about after they welcomed twin sons during the COVID-19 pandemic
The so-called "36 questions to fall in love" — which Catron had written about — were included at their receptionWhen Mandy Len Catron posed one of psychologist Arthur Aron's "36 questions to fall in love" to Mark Janusz Bondyra on their first date in July 2014, his response made her 'gulp' her beer.
'Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common,' Catron, an author and lecturer at the University of British Columbia, asked at the bar in downtown Vancouver in Canada.
'I think we're both interested in each other,' Bondyra, a user experience designer and business analyst, responded.
The question and intriguing answer, and the scene itself, are part of Catron's essay "To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This" for The New York Times' Modern Love column, which went viral when it ran the following January.
Bondyra and Catron ended their date by staring into each other's eyes for four minutes — another recommendation from Aron.
That November, while out dancing during a Halloween party, Bondyra told Catron that he loved her, according to the Times.
More than a decade after their first date, the couple married in an intimate ceremony — a decision that they didn't know if they'd ever make.
For Catron, now 44, who has spent her career researching relationships, marriage is 'the ultimate expression of romantic love — and actually, that's a pretty modern idea,' she told the Times.
For a long time, she said, committing to Bondyra without making it legal was their way of 'acknowledging some of the problems with the institution" (and "maybe resisting a little bit')
But then, in August 2024, the author of the 2018 memoir How to Fall in Love with Anyone, decided to propose after they couldn't decide between a commitment or traditional wedding ceremony, the Times reported.
'Of course. Of course I'll marry you,' said Bondyra, 49, who shares twin sons with Catron.
He was surprised but elated.
The pair were married at the Pacific Spirit Regional Park on Saturday, May 3, surrounded by 11 guests.
A friend officiated and, after the ceremony on that brisk but sunny day, the couple proceeded to celebrate with a champagne toast at their house and 70-person reception at a Belgian-style restaurant, according to the Times.
Catron made sure to include the famous 36 questions on name cards and in a bowl at the bar at the reception.
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As she explained to the Times, the choice to get married had become more appealing with time.
She and Bondyra struggled with fertility treatments that didn't work, then had to navigate a difficult pregnancy. Catron was hospitalized for weeks before she gave birth to their sons during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, in September 2021.
"It was just a series of hard, hard things,' she told the Times. 'And people — our friends and family — really took care of us through that.'
As the pandemic ended, Caton wanted to celebrate with everyone who showered them with love during that difficult time. And celebrate her bond with Bondyra, too.
Or, as she wrote in her viral essay a decade ago, 'Love didn't happen to us. We're in love because we each made the choice to be.'
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