Are your workouts killing the mood? Unpacking the fitness vs intimacy debate

IOL News

02-06-2025

For many, sexual wellbeing isn't just about intimacy it's tied to quality of life, confidence, and even relationships.
Image: Ketut Subiyanto/pexels
From viral TikTok fitness challenges to gym class staples, we're constantly encouraged to try the latest and greatest ways to 'get in shape'.
But what if some of these trendy exercises are doing more harm than good, especially when it comes to your sex life?
Certain popular workouts may be silently undermining your intimacy, according to Anita Fletcher, a sex and relationship expert at Fantasy Co., a brand known for its innovative approach to pleasure.
These exercises, often hailed as beneficial, could be causing tension, discomfort, or even long-term issues in the bedroom.
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So, which workouts are the culprits, and how can you protect your sexual well-being without sacrificing your fitness goals?
Fletcher unpacks the surprising risks of four common exercises and offers simple fixes to ensure your workouts support, rather than sabotage your sex life.
1. Kegels
Kegels are often celebrated as a miracle exercise for pelvic floor health, promising better orgasms and improved bladder control. But Fletcher warns that overdoing Kegels can lead to serious problems.
'There's a widespread myth that more Kegels equal better sex, but that's not true, Fletcher explains.
"An overly tight pelvic floor can cause pain during intercourse, make orgasms harder to achieve, and even trigger muscle spasms that completely shut down arousal.'
Many people unknowingly start Kegels with already tense pelvic floors due to stress, prolonged sitting, or past injuries. Adding even more tension through excessive Kegel exercises can exacerbate these issues.
She recommends learning to relax your pelvic floor before doing Kegels.'Alternate tensing for 5 seconds and releasing completely for 10 seconds, she advises. Limit sessions to 5 minutes, three times a week, avoid the 'hundreds of reps daily' advice circulating online.'
Cycling is a fantastic cardio workout, but long hours on a bike seat could be affecting more than your legs.
Image: Nubia Navarro (nubikini)/pexels
2. Cycling
Cycling is a fantastic cardio workout, but long hours on a bike seat could be affecting more than your legs. Extended time on hard, narrow saddles often compresses nerves and blood vessels in the genital area, leading to numbness or reduced sensation.
'Regular cyclists frequently report tingling, numbness, or even decreased sensitivity in their genital region. For men, this can contribute to erectile difficulties. For women, it might mean less arousal or trouble reaching orgasm.'
To protect yourself, invest in a padded, wider saddle to reduce pressure on sensitive areas. Stand periodically during rides, shift your position often, and take breaks between intense cycling sessions.
If you notice numbness, don't ignore it; that's your body signalling a problem.
3. Traditional Ab workouts tension in all the wrong places
Crunches and sit-ups might promise six-pack abs, but they often come with an unexpected cost: excessive tension in your lower abdominal and pelvic floor muscles.
'When you're repeatedly tightening these muscles through aggressive ab exercises, you're training your body to hold tension in areas that need to move freely during arousal and orgasm, Fletcher explains.
This can lead to sexual difficulties, including pain and reduced pleasure.' Balance your routine by incorporating exercises that release tension.
'Yoga poses like happy baby or child's pose are great for countering tightness. Also, focus on engaging your deep transverse abdominals, which strengthen your core without straining your pelvic floor.
Fitness should make you feel strong, energised, and ready to take on life – both in the gym and in the bedroom.
Image: Ahmet Kurt/pexels