Taking selfies with Pope Francis in his casket crosses a line
The "bad and ugly" of cellphone use has shocked Nicky Rennie this week. Photo / 123rf
Opinion by Nicky Rennie
Whanganui-based Nicky Rennie returned to her home town in 2018 while celebrating three decades in broadcasting. She has written a column for the Whanganui Chronicle since 2021.
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I am a fan of manners.
Thanks to my parents, they are, quite simply, woven into my DNA and, as a result, they are now woven into my daughter's. My opinion is that, if children have manners, people will think more highly of them and they will springboard into life
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New retailer opens doors
Photo: Peter McIntosh The country's newest retailer has opened its doors in Dunedin this week. The Outlet is in the old Torpedo7 store in Andersons Bay Rd which closed last month. Auckland-based Tahua Group Ltd, which owns Torpedo7 along with the likes of Burger King, Hannah's Shoes, Number One Shoes and Starbucks in New Zealand, converted 10 existing stores into an "off-price retail concept". Categories include apparel, footwear, adventure and outdoor gear, home and living, toys, health and beauty and gifts.
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Changing relationships with food, compassionately
Reducing her mum to tears was not the aim of Claire Turnbull's latest book but she felt she had to lay it all on the line if she was going to be able to effectively help people, the Queenstown-based nutritionist tells Rebecca Fox. Claire Turnbull believes it is hard to help others if you have not experienced tough times yourself — so she is "brutally honest" about her own journey. "I think when you've got to the point where you didn't want to be alive any more and you've gone through the process of wanting to take your own life, I think off the back of that, where I've got to now, is, like, I've literally got nothing to lose by putting this out there because I nearly wasn't here anyway." If by "ripping off my Band-aids and just sharing it" helps her connect with people, then she is willing to do it. "Because we've all got our battle scars and I think that's where the healing is, and I think we don't need to be defined by those, but they are part of us. "And I just hope that by revealing some of my own scars that someone can feel more comfortable with theirs." She is quick to point out that she is not 100% healed and will never be. "I'm still on the journey. But I can pick up a marshmallow and be like, oh, I don't really fancy that and put it down. But I'm a person that used to, literally, if I looked at a bag of Maltesers I'd already eaten three bags of them." Turnbull, a trained dietitian and fitness instructor, details that journey in her latest book alongside insight, advice, tips and tricks on how people can change their relationship with food for the better "for free". Having practised as a dietitian for two decades she has seen a repeated pattern of people getting to the point where they are struggling with their weight and fatigued but wanting to eat better and look after themselves. "But the first thing they default to is the next diet. And what happens is people get results, and then they can't maintain it because it's unrealistic, and really they haven't got to the root of the problem for themselves." Food information can be quite subtle and sneaky these days, but anything that restricts what you eat is a diet and will be hard to maintain long-term, she says. "It's bull.... and people know it. But we all think, gosh we'll get there. Well, you know, it's not worked the 20 times we've done it before, it's still not going to work this time. It cannot be fixed in six weeks, it cannot be fixed with a pill." Many people reach for food or alcohol for comfort or due to boredom. For others it is a way to manage difficult feelings resulting from abuse and trauma, while for Turnbull it was low self-esteem and a tendency to be obsessive. "There's all these different reasons why we struggle with food, and it's this horrible cycle of self-hatred and self-blame and shame around the way that we eat and we think that the next diet is gonna be the answer, and I just want people to understand why they've got themselves into this position and then find a way through that is a lot more compassionate." If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111. She warns the book is not a "quick fix" and that people's journeys, like her own, will be ongoing. "Real life is always going to throw you curveballs and always going to throw you challenges and unfortunately all these diets that sell you the quick-fix option. Turnbull, who has a positive psychology diploma, worries that each time someone experiences that, it erodes their soul. But there is another way, she says. "We just need to realise that we are all human, we are all imperfect. We all are going to struggle with very different things. We're all going to make mistakes." She firmly believes the solution is to find the root cause of the problem and work on that as food is often the symptom of a situation — hence the use of the iceberg analogy. "So when people understand themselves, that is the first point of change. So through my 20 years of working, the biggest thing I know is that awareness is the first stage of change." The book aims to help people understanding why they struggle with food — why they eat when they are bored or tired or to manage their emotions. "We eat very habitually. People finish their food off their plate because we were told to do that when we were children. We eat when something is offered to us because it's rude to say no. We eat food when it's there at a morning tea shout or a lunch thing or picking out of our kids' lunch boxes when it's there. "There's so much eating and drinking that happens that has got absolutely nothing to do with us consciously, like, nourishing our bodies." So if people are able to eliminate what Turnbull calls "non-hungry" eating and manage those behaviours they do not need to go on a diet because a lot of the extra food and drinking they are doing is what has sent them off-track. Instead of using a restrictive or limitation method which just makes the food more appealing, she urges people to flip the way they think about food. "What I encourage people to do instead then is actually approach food from a place of what can you add in to the way that you're eating to help nourish your body better? How can you improve the way that you eat?" She also looks at sleep. How much or how little people get impacts on appetite and cravings and ability to manage emotions. It helps to look at how people grew up, their parents' relationship with food and how that influences their own behaviours, she says. Turnbull grew up when everyone's mothers were going to Weightwatchers or on a diet and watching their weight. It was one of her mother's diet books that triggered her own journey to an eating disorder including secret bingeing and throwing up. She was in her second year of university when her mental health took a turn for the worse and she decided she wanted it to be all over but luckily a friend walked in and took her to the doctor. Getting her mother to proof-read the book was very difficult. "She cried a lot because she didn't know what happened to me. I didn't go into detail of what happened, but dear God, it was a hard read." It was also hard as her mother blamed herself despite her behaviour being completely normal for that era. "It's like smoking, you know, no-one knew the implications of putting your kid on a diet or telling them they were a bit too fat, you know?" Turnbull is thankful both of them have a healthier relationship with food these days. "She's in a really good place with food, because of the work that I have done. And I said, 'Mum, if we'd not been through this journey together, this book and the work that we've done together is not going to help all the other mothers and daughters out there that have been through the same thing'." The important thing for parents to realise is that children are watching carefully their language and actions around food as it is behaviour not words that children take in, she says. "It's so difficult for children to eat well in this modern environment that we live in. But they are not listening to what you say, they are watching what you do." But what Turnbull wants people to be aware of is that they are only human and do not have to be perfect every day. She aims for a balanced lifestyle which means nothing is off limits and she enjoys the odd treat. And no, she is not judging you when she sees you in the supermarket or in a restaurant. "I would just like to always say to people, I don't care what's in your trolley. If I'm around a friend's house or out for dinner, I genuinely am not thinking about what other people are eating. They're probably thinking about it more than I am, to be honest. There's no place for judgement." The book End Your Fight With Food , Claire Turnbull. How to change your eating habits for good, Allen and Unwin, RRP $36.99. Where to get help: Lifeline: 0800-543-354 or (09) 522-2999 Suicide Prevention Helpline: 0508-828-865 (0508 TAUTOKO) Youthline: 0800-376-633 or free text 234 Samaritans: 0800-726-666
NZ Herald
7 days ago
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‘No regrets' for Rotorua Retiree
A 600m move brought Lesley new friends, fun and peace of mind. Despite moving just 'around the corner' from her family home, Lesley Evanson reckons it is one of the biggest – and best – steps she's taken in her life. After selling her family home, the 73-year-old shifted three months ago into a brand-new unit in the recently completed 87-unit Karaka Pines Regency Park Estate in Rotorua. 'I haven't gone far,' she says. 'My home was literally 600m from the village and I've lived in the area for 40 years. I've no regrets. Everyone here is so friendly and it has a nice vibe. I don't even think about my old house now.' Regency Park Estate is owned and operated by Tauranga-based Karaka Pines Villages and is one of eight retirement villages the company runs throughout New Zealand. With 59 units occupied when Karaka Pines purchased the complex in 2019, a further 28 have since been constructed, with the final one completed in February this year. One of the advantages for people moving into Karaka Pines Villages like Regency Park Estate is that they get to retain capital gains, unlike the situation at most other retirement communities in New Zealand, where it is kept by village operators. Karaka Pines CEO Adam Yates says this financial model is a fair one for residents and can make the difference of hundreds of thousands of dollars in their pockets. The last unit to be constructed at Regency Park Estate was the one snapped up by Evanson, and already she says it feels like home. 'It's got two bedrooms, a joint bathroom (between the bedrooms), a visitor toilet and a huge kitchen, living area and patio. I love it,' she says. 'I had watched the village being built and a few years ago I took an aunt to have a look at it. Then I had some of my friends move in here which started me thinking 'oh, maybe it's time for me too'. 'Since I've been here, I've had other residents knock on my door and introduce themselves, it's been really nice. The staff and managers are lovely and keep us informed about what's going on.' While Evanson enjoys plenty outside the village – including aqua jogging, knitting, crochet and quilting – she's kept just as busy within Regency Park Estate. 'There is always something to do,' she says. 'A lot of activities are organised for us. We had a Mother's Day night and I believe they are arranging something for the King's Birthday weekend in June.' Evanson, who lives alone, was just six when she emigrated to New Zealand from England with her parents. Before settling in Rotorua, she lived in many areas of the country including Northland, Lower Hutt, Christchurch and Auckland. She retired four years ago from her job in the information systems department at Rotorua Hospital, a position she held for 33 years. Another plus for Evanson is that she still sees her five grandchildren regularly. Ranging in age from 3 to 23, they all live nearby apart from her 23-year-old granddaughter who is away studying in Hamilton. 'One of my granddaughters goes to high school not far from Regency Park Estate and she often pops in to see me on her way home.' Yates describes Regency Park Estate as a boutique lifestyle retirement village set in 'beautiful' landscaped grounds. It is close to the Redwoods Forest Park and is a short drive from the Green and Blue lakes, Lake Tarawera and Lake Rotorua. 'Everything people need to live a satisfying and easy-going retirement is close at hand as well,' he says. 'The Te Ngae shopping centre is just across the road and a bus stop is right outside the village.' Yates says construction on the first home in the new development started in July 2021 (progress had earlier been held up amid the Covid-19 pandemic) with the first resident moving in in December 2021. 'In the time we have owned Regency Park Estate we have renovated the resident community centre, introduced a weekly fee that's fixed for 15 years, and had the pleasure of watching residents thrive.' He says homes come up for sale in the village from time to time. Before being put on the market, they are refurbished to near new condition with modern kitchens and bathrooms. Apart from Regency Park Estate, Karaka Pines operate Roseland Park in Hamilton, Kempton Park in Tauranga, Karaka Lifestyle Estate in Auckland, Karaka Pines Rototuna in Hamilton, Woodcroft Estate in Christchurch, Karaka Pines Waihī Beach and Karaka Pines Pāpāmoa.
