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34 minutes ago
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The seven significant traits of a sociopath and how to spot one in your life
Think sociopath and you'll probably conjure up a mental image of Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, or serial killer Ted Bundy, or even Jeffrey Skilling, the chief executive of Enron who manipulated one of the biggest corporate fraud scandals in America and notoriously showed no remorse during his trial (and conviction) in 2006. But the bigger picture is complex. The term 'sociopath', while often used in the vernacular, is not recognised as a diagnostic label by the ICD-11 (International Classification of Diseases 11th Revision), published by the World Health Organisation. It describes sociopathic traits as dissocial personality disorder. In psychology circles, it is also referred to as antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). Psychopathic traits also sit under this umbrella, and while they share similarities, psychopathy tends to play out in more severe actions and has a stronger genetic link. The NHS states: 'Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour.' For those living with this condition, or others in relationships with them, the long-term outcome can feel bleak. Studies indicate that around 1 per cent of the UK population meets the criteria for ASPD and it is more prevalent in men (up to 4 per cent of all males). Even more disturbing is that 50-80 per cent of male prisoners show ASPD characteristics, as do a high number of chief executives in business. Yet experts agree that sociopathy sits on a spectrum. Patric Gagne, an author and therapist, calls herself a '21st-century sociopath'. She is a well-known advocate for those suffering from ASPD, with a PhD in clinical psychology. 'I am a mother and a wife, therapist, member of a country club and well-liked – yet also 'mostly immune to remorse and grief',' she says, adding that, contrary to society's expectations, 'You can be a sociopath and have a healthy relationship. You can be a sociopath and be educated.' Experts also believe that if a person is willing to recognise and understand their behaviour and work towards change, they have the chance of living a socially adaptive and meaningful life. Here are the typical tendencies of sociopaths to look out for… They ramp up the charisma for their own advantage A sociopath is often thinking: 'How can I work this opportunity for personal gain?' So, while they might present themselves as an affable raconteur, there is little sincerity in the seemingly charming words that fall from their mouth. Sumeet Grover, a British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy-registered psychotherapist, says: 'Pulling you into their world gives them power and a sense of grandiosity. And it deflects what is really going on for them internally. Their sense of self – who I am as a person – is fragmented and so they don't feel in the same way as most people. They can be very charming, believable and relatable, while often lacking in a felt sense of empathy or remorse.' Grover goes on to explain that while the exact cause of ASPD, particularly sociopathy, isn't known, it is believed that genetics and environmental factors, including parenting styles, abuse and neglect, play a role. 'Specific behavioural traits can be seen in children as young as seven and this is called 'conduct disorder'. This might be when a young person has a history of being cruel to animals or vulnerable people, destructive at school or consistently involved in arson or theft. Research suggests that 40 per cent of males and 25 per cent of females with conduct disorder are likely to be diagnosed with ASPD in adulthood.' They rebel against authority (and never pay their parking fines) It's two-fingers-up to anyone who tries to tell them what to do or stands in their way of success. Sociopaths are masters of deceit and would rather suffer potential legal action than abide by the rules. Often they act irresponsibly without feelings of culpability, remorse or guilt. Because ASPD sits on a spectrum, some sufferers might commit monstrous acts, while others with low-level traits may veer more towards petty crimes like not paying overdue fines or shoplifting and, upon reflection, experience shame for their misdemeanours. Dr Lisa Orban, a clinical psychologist, believes these offenders could benefit from talking therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy to manage compulsions and harmful thoughts, or acceptance and commitment therapy which focuses on handling unhelpful beliefs and feelings so they don't control someone's life. She stresses: 'The success of these treatments is dependent on the person's awareness of their actions and a commitment to behavioural change.' They will charm a crowd but lasting relationships can elude them While sociopaths can feel automatic emotions like anger, fear and sadness, it's more difficult for them to experience and understand learnt emotions like guilt, shame, affection and, particularly, empathy. Internally, they tend to believe everyone else on the planet is a loser, but externally they exploit their manipulative charm and lack of social anxiety to snare others. Their ability to 'mirror' the more positive behaviour of those around them reaps the attention (and adoration) they crave. But when it comes to building more lasting and loving connections, their 'performance' is revealed as being void of genuine feeling. Dr Tharaka Gunarathne, a clinical psychiatrist, adds: 'Someone with ASPD may form attachments, but these are often shallow and driven by personal gain rather than mutual care. The kind of love rooted in empathy, vulnerability and emotional reciprocity is typically impaired. This relates in part to how their brain is wired. The amygdala – which helps us read emotional cues – often shows reduced activity in people with ASPD, and its communication with the prefrontal cortex (our brain's control centre which helps us with moral judgment and long-term thinking) is often disrupted. So, while they might mimic the behaviours of love, the emotional depth behind those behaviours is usually limited.' They live life on the edge Studies show that because sociopaths have reduced amygdala activity in the brain, they often underestimate risk and experience a delayed response to fear. Danger becomes a means to feeling alive or empowered. In her memoir, Sociopath, Gagne writes about the risky behaviour she has displayed over the years: stealing cars and cruising around the late-night streets of Los Angeles, breaking into homes, attending the funerals of strangers… Her belief is that sociopaths find it impossible to feel in the same way as most people. Instead, they can experience apathy, or a lack of feeling, which can be a driver for certain destructive actions. In the book, Gagne's therapist explains: 'It is this lack of feeling, many researchers believe, that causes them (sociopaths) to behave aggressively and destructively. The sociopath's subconscious desire to feel is what forces him to act out.' Gagne adds: 'I was starting to understand why doing bad things made me feel… something. However brief, it connected me to the way I imagined everyone else felt all the time… And we weren't 'bad' or 'evil' or 'crazy', we just had a harder time with feelings. We acted out to fill a void.' They will be aware of your every move – and seek to dominate in relationships Very little escapes the laser focus of a sociopath. Their drive for control and power can trump any interest for a deep connection or intimate partnership. They often seek to dominate and dictate the situation and mood, with little or no concern for your needs or desires. It's not uncommon for a sociopath to engage in obsessive behaviour, even stalking someone who piques their curiosity. In extreme cases, their compulsion to control can resort into aggression and maybe violence. Dr Gunarathne acknowledges that those who are low on the spectrum may have more success with relationships, but he suggests: 'If you're with someone who fits this pattern, setting firm, non-negotiable boundaries in your own mind is essential. Don't get drawn into trying to 'fix' them – instead, focus on what you can control: your response, your limits and your network of friends who will support you. Seek professional advice if needed. Charm and confidence can be persuasive, but if the emotional cost to you is high, it's a sign to step back and reflect.' They won't say sorry To be able to apologise, or learn from mistakes, a person needs to care about the impact of their actions. Sociopaths might say sorry – especially if it serves a purpose or garners trust – but do they genuinely mean it? It's more likely they will see apologising as a sign of cowering down or a threat to their supremacy. They are more likely to push the blame on to others, making them believe everything is their fault. Dr Orban adds: 'Even though someone with ASPD may not feel remorse, they can still recognise right from wrong and read the reactions of others. Skills-based training that incorporates emotional intelligence, for example, can help improve social awareness, self-regulation and relationship management, even if the capacity for empathy is limited.' They manipulate the truth There is no one a sociopath likes better than number one. They consider themselves to be the top dog who exists in a dog-eat-dog environment and when necessary, they will obliterate everyone else to achieve their goals. And if that means twisting the truth in their favour, the facts will rapidly become blurred. Partners of sociopaths often confide they believe they are going mad because a sociopath has manipulated the truth to such extremes, they can't decipher what's real anymore. Dr Ute Liersch, a counselling psychologist at The Soke, a private mental health care centre in London, works with women who are trying to leave such toxic relationships. 'It is far from simple,' she says. 'Often they are undergoing the most brutal of divorces. And a manipulative person with ASPD will use their skills to get exactly what they want. Not only are these women doubting their experience, there is research data showing that when we live with a controlling partner, our brain function changes in the same way as if we were taking drugs. We can become addicted to that person, which makes it extremely hard to leave them. I see women managing excruciating symptoms of withdrawal. It can be a painful and debilitating separation.' Broaden your horizons with award-winning British journalism. Try The Telegraph free for 1 month with unlimited access to our award-winning website, exclusive app, money-saving offers and more. Solve the daily Crossword
Yahoo
43 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Gay model arrested after his estranged husband was found dead in their New York City apartment
Gay fitness model Donald Zieben-Hood has been arrested after his fitness trainer husband was found dead with multiple stab wounds. Zieben-Hood was arrested on August 3 and charged with burglary, criminal contempt of court, and weapons possession in connection with the death of his husband, Jacob Zieben-Hood, who was found dead in their New York City apartment, NBC 4 New York reported. Jacob, a 34-year-old personal trainer and influencer, was found slumped over a toilet in their Harlem home with multiple stab wounds across his body, per the outlet. He was discovered with a gash on his head, several wounds to the back of his leg, including one that penetrated the muscle, but a medical examiner has yet to determine the cause of death. Jacob was pronounced dead at the scene after his husband called 911. When the police arrived at the scene, Donald had three cuts on his arm with required stitches and alleged that Jacob had attacked him with a knife, but he told the 911 operator that he was worried he might be arrested for violating the protective order that Jacob had against him. However, according to prosecutors, Jacob's dad said he got a call from his son where he could hear Donald yelling at Jacob and calling him names, People reports. Donald claims he fell asleep after the argument and then woke up around 4 a.m. to find Jacob dead. But prosecutors allege that Donald cut Jacob with a knife before calling 911. The couple had a history of domestic abuse dating back to 2022. Donald has pleaded not guilty to the charges against him and will return to court on August 7. Officials are investigating the incident as a homicide, but Donald has not been charged with the death of his estranged husband. This article originally appeared on Pride: Gay model arrested after his estranged husband was found dead in their New York City apartment RELATED These Male Models Transformed Into Real-Life Tom of Finland Drawings Androgynous Male Model's Bare Chest too Much for Barnes & Noble Who's the hot Met Gala mystery man that has the whole internet thirsting?
Yahoo
43 minutes ago
- Yahoo
Windsor police arrest knife-wielding man in long weekend incident on Walker Road
The Windsor Police Service says officers have arrested a man who allegedly threatened to harm others with a knife. Police say they responded at around 11:30 a.m. Saturday to a report that a man was heading to a retail store planning to "purchase knives to kill people." While they were on their way, they received a second report that a man was yelling and causing a disturbance in a business in the 4100 block of Walker Road, according to a news release issued Tuesday by the police service. The man then purchased a three-pack of knives and concealed them in his waistband. Officers found the man nearby. But when one officer got out of his cruiser, the man reportedly drew two knives from his waistband, raised one in an aggressive manner, and began approaching the officer, police said. Police said the officer was able to de-escalate the situation and took the man into custody without further incident. A 28-year-old man has been charged with: Possession of a weapon for a dangerous purpose. Carrying a concealed weapon. Assaulting a peace officer. Failure to comply with a release order. Failure to comply with an undertaking. Police are urging anyone with information about the incident to contact the major crimes unit or Windsor & Essex County Crime Stoppers.
