The Hidden Cost Of Trauma: How Unhealed Wounds Impact Women's Wealth
Shay "Your Love Diva" Levister is the founder and CEO of Shay Better Coaching.
Trauma doesn't just live in the mind or body—it lives in your bank account, too. Sexual assault and unhealed sexual trauma, in particular, can impact emotional well-being, but can also have long-term financial consequences that many women never realize until it's too late. From under-earning to self-sabotage in business and relationships, the cost of unhealed wounds is far greater than most are willing to admit.
Sexual trauma can disrupt the very foundation of a woman's self-worth, and when self-worth is compromised, so is her ability to attract, retain and multiply wealth.
The World Health Organization reports that one in three women worldwide experiences some form of physical and/or sexual violence in their lifetime. Workplace sexual harassment can significantly disrupt women's careers, leading to financial stress and diminished career attainment. A 2017 study, 'The Economic and Career Effects of Sexual Harassment on Working Women,' found that women who experienced workplace sexual harassment often decided to leave a job early and many said it affected their career advancement.
These career disruptions can have long-term financial consequences, including reduced lifetime earnings and hindered professional growth.
Women with unhealed trauma often struggle with self-worth and assertiveness—two critical factors in salary negotiations and career growth. This is especially costly in leadership and entrepreneurial roles, where confidence and visibility directly impact income.
Sexual trauma can also send individuals into survival mode, causing them to operate from a place of fear, whereby they believe they must cling to what they have instead of taking strategic risks. This can lead to:
• Staying in toxic jobs because leaving feels too risky
• Accepting lower pay instead of advocating for financial growth
• Overworking to prove their worth
Scarcity thinking is an invisible tax on a woman's potential, keeping her stuck in cycles of burnout instead of expansion.
Beyond the personal cost, the economic burden is staggering. A 2017 study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimated the associated lifetime costs of rape to be $122,461 per victim. This includes medical care, mental health treatment, lost productivity and legal costs.
For the insured, this could mean an average of $948 in out-of-pocket costs for medical services, including hospital stays and prescription medications, upfront. However, a 2022 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that uninsured survivors of sexual assault faced average medical charges of $3,673 for emergency care following an assault, including expenses for forensic examinations, emergency contraception, STI testing and follow-up care. These figures underscore the immediate and significant financial impact that sexual violence can have on individuals in addition to the long-term economic burden previously estimated by the CDC.
Unhealed trauma can also seep into relationships. In my work, I've seen that women with unresolved wounds may attract what I call "emotional or financial takers." If a woman subconsciously believes love must be earned through over-giving, she may end up financially supporting others at the expense of her own growth.
Many women I have worked with have also developed money avoidance behaviors as a result of their sexual trauma. Avoidance might look like refusing to check bank accounts due to financial anxiety, overspending to self-soothe rather than building financial security or neglecting investments and long-term financial planning. When financial literacy and empowerment are neglected, wealth-building opportunities slip through the cracks, reinforcing the cycle of instability.
Understanding emotional triggers is the first step toward breaking cycles of financial fear, shame and self-sabotage. I recommend women focus on a few key areas:
• Self-worth. Greater confidence can lead to higher earnings as you feel empowered to negotiate more, lead confidently and demand your value.
• An abundance mindset. If you see opportunities, you are more likely to embrace calculated risks and expand your income streams.
• Aligned relationships. Look for partners and collaborators who fuel—not drain—your purpose.
• Financial awareness. Focus on wealth building and reducing avoidant behaviors to make smarter money moves.
Healing is more than emotional relief—it's a strategic move toward wealth. When a woman does the inner work to heal, she shifts from surviving to thriving, creating space for growth in every area of her life.
The information provided here is not intended as medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. You should consult with a qualified healthcare provider for advice concerning your specific situation.
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