More men reaching out for perinatal mental health support when having children

Australia Broadcast Center

06-05-2025

A day after making her birth plan, Maddy Dawe was in labour.
"I don't even think I knew how I was feeling, I was just in shock," she said, of the unexpected early birth.
While trying to comprehend the situation, Maddy's partner Lauchlan Craig found himself driving them to another hospital in Melbourne's outer-east, because the one they had planned to use was full.
He doesn't quite remember the trip there.
'I think I was quite stressed at the time and running on adrenaline,' Mr Craig said.
That night, their son was born premature at 34 weeks and six days.
'He was actually squeezing my finger really tightly, and I just knew that everything was going to be OK,' Mr Craig said.
Mr Craig had dreamed of being a dad for years.
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For as long as he can remember, the 34-year-old knew he wanted to be a dad.
So when Ms Dawe fell pregnant, he said they were both delighted.
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The prospect of becoming parents for the first time is something that we'd spoken about for many years and dreamed of.
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There were some initial nerves after the couple's previous miscarriage, but they faded away after hearing their baby's heartbeat at 14 weeks.
'It was just pure joy and just happiness,' Mr Craig said.
Mr Craig experienced a period of stress and anxiety after the birth of his son.
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A short time after arriving home from hospital, Maddy was readmitted with an infection, where she stayed for a fortnight.
""It was an acutely stressful couple of weeks for our new little family and I think we both felt pretty powerless in the situation," she said.
Mr Craig found himself looking after a newborn as well as his partner.
'I think you take the back seat a little bit. I think your own mental and physical health just is pushed to the side,' he said.
The new father became the primary caregiver to his son and wife.
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Experiencing a busy and stressful few weeks after the birth, Mr Craig said his feelings started to change.
'I was on the edge. I just didn't really feel like myself.
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[I was] just worrying about the other two, and how they're doing, and really just at breaking point.
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He started losing his appetite and his sleep patterns also changed, which were characterised by the heightened stress and anxiety.
'I was in fight or flight mode. [I] didn't really know where to turn to, or who to talk to,' he said.
Ms Dawe said it was difficult watching these events impact her partner's mental health.
"It was an acutely stressful couple of weeks for our new little family and I think we both felt pretty powerless in the situation," she said.
The new father, who had a history of depression, then picked up the phone for help.
Searching for support
Mr Craig was at a medical appointment with his newborn son when he broke into tears.
'It just went from zero to 100 quite quickly in a very short amount of time,' he said.
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I was familiar with postnatal depression within mothers in particular. I'd never really heard that term used for fathers or secondary carers before.
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Mr Craig called
'I immediately knew that they were familiar with what I was feeling,' he said.
The ForWhen clinicians have expertise in perinatal and infant mental health, which spans from the start of pregnancy to when the child is 12 months old.
The service also helps people who have recently lost a baby.
Erin Duncan is a Victorian care navigator with the service.
She said there had been an influx of new fathers calling in since ForWhen launched three years ago.
'We've absolutely seen an increase in the number of men. More often they're referred by their partner or a health professional,' she said.
Erin Duncan regularly follows up with callers to check in on their mental health.
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The service has supported more than 7,500 parents over the past three years, including hundreds of men.
Each phone call typically begins with a conversation about what the caller is experiencing, before a screening process to understand the stress on their family.
'Often it can be really hard for men to reach out for support, particularly in the perinatal period where they might see their needs are secondary to their partner's,' Ms Duncan said.
'If dads don't reach out for support, then it's going to impact the whole family.
'They kind of take a bit of a back role and put themselves second to everyone else."
About 12 per cent of callers are from culturally and linguistically diverse backgrounds, including a growing number of Indigenous couples.
ForWhen will often check in on people after their initial phone call to help parents navigate the complex journey into parenthood.
'It's probably one of the biggest transitions that we go through in life, being a new parent,' Ms Duncan said.
More men with symptoms
Sean Menere is a counsellor at
'Postnatal depression in men is an abstract concept that people just haven't really thought of up until the point that they're experiencing it,' he said.
About one in 10 fathers experience poor mental health during the pregnancy phase or their child's first year.
Researchers say those with a partner experiencing postnatal depression may be at risk.
Other contributing factors include a history of mental illness, relationship dissatisfaction and low family income.
Counsellor Sean Menere speaks to many new fathers about their mental health.
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'There's emotional peaks and troughs that you may not have experienced before,' Mr Menere said.
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A lot of men are under the impression that this is an amazing time and being a new father is this incredible experience, and then the baby arrives and they don't feel that.
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Back in Melbourne's east, Lauchlan Craig said his experiences with perinatal anxiety and depression have recently prompted a career change from his current profession as a graphic designer.
'I think everything that I've gone through and my family's gone through, led me to pursue a different career, which is in counselling,' he said.
Mr Craig has completed his first trimester of study, while his son recently had his first birthday. Weeks later, he and Maddy got married.
He said since seeking professional help, he has become a better husband, father, and had more important conversations with his friends.
'That phone call proceeded to change my life, and our lives in a positive way," Mr Craig said.
'But it's definitely a phone call and a service that I wish I'd accessed a lot sooner.'