People Who Divorced Their High School Sweetheart Are Sharing The Final Straw, And It Is JUICY
We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us why they divorced their high school sweethearts. They got extremely honest in their replies, and here's what they had to say:
1."We were together since junior year. Married by 21. First child by 22. Three more over 25 years. We had some really epic adventures in our time. In our 40s, we diverged in our interests, life direction, and she got into this quasi-religious spiritual thing. Sadly, where we could always just talk like friends, became doubts and quarrels over nothing. We divorced, and I wish I could say we stayed friends, but we didn't."
—icycake878
2."I divorced him after I found him in the shower with his obviously pregnant employee. Mind you, he had gaslight me a bunch of times before, but seeing him in the shower with her was my breaking point. He still tried with 'It's not what it looks like,' To which I replied, 'Are you giving her the annual review?!'"
—creativedragon167
3."My ex and I met my junior year of high school. We were together for 2.5 years before getting married. We had three kids together. Then one day, out of the blue, he emptied the bank account, flew halfway across the country and slept with someone else's wife. They were coworkers. He said 'nothing happened', but it was all my fault. When she started forwarding her mail to my house, it was over."
—Anonymous, 43 Texas
4."Our 5-year-old son got sent to the hospital by the urgent care doctor because he was having breathing issues and wasn't getting enough oxygen into his lungs. I called my husband at the time, and instead of leaving work (which he easily could have done), he worked the entire day, leaving my son and me alone all day and showing up nine hours later. That was the final straw. I realized then that if he couldn't be there for us in that moment, then when would he be? I asked for a divorce a few days later."
—Anonymous, 42, USA
5."It's funny because my sister and I had opposite experiences. I divorced my high school sweetheart because we simply were content with each other, not happy. We got along fine and the sexual chemistry was great, but after college, we began to become different people. Not bad people, just different. I ended because I wanted happiness in my marriage, not contentment. Meanwhile, my sister has been with the same guy since the 8th grade and is still happily together with two kids."
—Anonymous, 28, Iowa
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6."Before marrying me, my husband married his high school sweetheart. But she wouldn't stop cheating on him. He said men that he worked with and people in his family came and confessed to him that they'd had an affair with her. When her youngest was 1 year old, she moved out with her girlfriend and left her children for 10 months. She never called or visited them. Then, evidently, she talked to an attorney, got back in the house, and was able to get custody of her kids. My husband took her back twice and then once more for the kids. But after that, he was done."
—Anonymous, 60 Florida
7."I met my high school sweetheart in 1988. I was a freshman and he was a junior. We dated until he graduated and went to college. We made it the first year of his college experience, but then broke up. I dated another person until I graduated in 1992. My first love came back and asked me to marry him. He was my first love, of course, I said yes. We got married and moved away. He was a military man and was away often. We lived in a beautiful place, but he wasn't happy. I, of course, was as supportive as I could possibly be. After a year of his depression and manic episodes, I asked him to seek help. He said he couldn't because they would kick him out of the military. I tolerated the isolation and loneliness for another three months and then I decided to leave."
"If I weren't as important as his military career, I should probably be important to myself. I went to him with an ultimatum and said Get help for your depression, or I'm going to leave. I gave him 30 days to make a change. On day 30, I asked him if he was taking me to the airport or if he was going to pick up the car later. He drove me to the airport in silence and let me get on the plane and never asked a thing. We divorced after almost two years of marriage."
—Anonymous, 51 Oregon
8."We met on a hayride at 13, and we were together a few years in school until we moved away. I was divorced after 28 years of marriage to someone else in another state. I moved back to Tulsa and reconnected with my high school boyfriend. A year later, we were married and divorced eight months later. I discovered he was a functioning alcoholic; he hid it so well, but after marriage, he spent every weekend totally drunk."
—Anonymous, 80. AR
9."This was nearly 27 years ago, so no online banking. Turns out, he was secretly spending all of what little money we had. He'd tell me I didn't need to get him anything for lunch at the grocery store, he'd just eat ramen when he got home. In reality, he was buying lunch every day to be 'cool,' all while I ate cheese sandwiches. He was depositing empty envelopes of cash at the ATM and then withdrawing the maximum amount from the deposit. The last straw was not our card being declined at the grocery store with a full cart, but the repo man showing up at our door to take our car. I was sending the payments by check, but they were bouncing. My husband was hiding the notices when they came in the mail."
—Anonymous, 45 San Diego
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10."I was with him from the ages of 13-35. There were years of him cheating on me, drug addiction, and gambling, but what really ended things was when he sold our house, packed myself and our two kids up, moved us across the country, and then left saying he was going back to our home state to tie up loose ends and would be back in two weeks. He never returned. Our marriage was already falling apart, and I thought the move was our fresh start. Turned out it was, but in a very different way."
—Anonymous, 39, Pittsburgh
11."We got married after I graduated; he was older. He was 21 and I was 19. I moved across the country for him, and we were pregnant within months. By the second year of marriage, he was having an affair. He made it very clear that I 'had let myself go' (he was referring to my pregnancy) and that he wanted to 'act his age.' His friends and coworkers were mostly single and younger than he was, and he felt that being married and a father at his age was holding him down. We were divorced by our third year of marriage after I found out he was soliciting hookups online."
—Anonymous, 39, California
12."We engaged, got pregnant, and got married in my senior year. We went on to have three children. We moved cross-country for his job. He then came out of the closet. We divorced after 10 years of marriage."
—Anonymous
13."There were the 'usual' things that led to divorce. For years, I'd beg for him to talk to me, go to therapy, do things I was interested in, and more. The final straw happened slowly, but gave me enough time to get my life together to support myself. He told me 'Don't bother coming home' on two occasions. First, when I was going to Ireland with my family and he took it as if I were leaving him. In his 'defense,' I had recently said how unhappy I was. The second time was when I got a tattoo in Ireland. If he did it a third time, I promised myself to get out. He said it a third time when I was visiting a friend and didn't answer the phone."
"I was done. I quit caring, quit begging, and stopped investing in us. I focused purely on school and my career for two years in order to move out. I finished school, passed my VTNE on the first try, took a two-week vacation and moved out two months later."
—Anonymous, 31, Tacoma, Washington
14."We met in our senior year, 2000-2001, through my best friend from kindergarten. We went to different schools, and she wanted to go to all the football games, so she brought the guy she was dating and his friend. In January he asked me to his senior prom and we became a couple that night. We moved in together in 2002 and eloped in Las Vegas in 2003. We had two miscarriages, and as an adult, I started to struggle with my weight. He would always hang out with his friends, and he had a truck and money. All my money went to him to pay for his truck and our apartment."
"I didn't even have a phone to contact anyone, and no car. I was very isolated. Fast forward to 2005, and we were living with my parents, 'saving money.' I was at the pool with my sister and her friends when he showed up from work early. At the pool, he said, 'You are fat and your sister will always look better than you.' I decided I was done. He moved out that night."
—Anonymous
15."After eight years of marriage, me putting him through college, and moving three times for his career. There was always an excuse as to why we couldn't start a family. Then it appeared that I may have a problem with my ovaries. The doctor recommended minor surgery, and my husband was forced to tell me he NEVER wanted children. I told him that God might make that decision, but NO man would. We divorced, and I married a wonderful man. We've been together for 42 years and have two kids."
—Anonymous, 72 North Carolina
16.And finally, "My husband and I met in elementary school. He was always a flight risk, meaning I had to constantly convince him to stay. Three kids later, and nearly 25 years later, he just decided he was unhappy. I asked him if he even loved me, and he couldn't answer, so I was done."
—Anonymous, 42 Colorado
Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
Why did you divorce your high school sweetheart? Tell us in the comments or use the anonymous form below:
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