Unmarried late 20's man with poor fashion sense rates sports fits at 2025 Met Gala

USA Today

06-05-2025

Unmarried late 20's man with poor fashion sense rates sports fits at 2025 Met Gala
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Black dandyism: Met Gala to highlight Black influence in fashion
Black dandys and clothiers are being celebrated with this year's Met Gala theme, "Superfine: Tailoring Black Style."
I am a 28-year-old unmarried man with very poor fashion sense. I have never watched the Met Gala before. In the last year, three of my female friends have asked to take me on shopping sprees in order to improve my fashion. I have not taken any of them up on that offer.
Despite these beaming qualifications, USA Today determined it fit for me to judge the outfits of the sports stars at the 2025 Met Gala.
Why? I've no idea, but I have seen how my boss dresses and I'm definitely more qualified than him.
Regardless, the Met Gala is an annual event that gives celebrities the opportunity to dress their best, strut their stuff, and put their best foot forward all while facing massive criticism from experts everywhere. Having never seen the Met Gala before, I haven't the slightest idea what to expect, but I will be handing out harsh grades for everyone.
I know that the theme is "Superfine: Tailoring Black Style," but I am white and, in case I hadn't made it clear already, have no style. Therefore, forewarning, that theme is getting thrown out the window in my assessments.
So, buckle up, you may have seen opinions from people with fashion degrees and years of experience with this type of event, but have you ever heard opinions from a man with Cheeto dust on more than half of the shirts in his closet? I doubt it.
Met Gala 2025: Live updates from fashion's biggest night
Sports figure fit checks at 2025 Met Gala
Noah Lyles
The fastest man alive, Olympic gold medalist Noah Lyles was one of the first sports figures to show at the 2025 Met Gala. Lyles wore Thom Browne, and I have no idea if that is good or not, but I do know that is not how Tom is typically spelled, making the fit seem that much more high-class.
As for the fit itself, I believe I can speak for all men when I say we appreciate a good jacket. This is a nice jacket with a solid cane to boot. The rings and jewelry look outstanding as well. That said, shorts and a jacket is a bold choice. While you certainly can't blame a track star for wanting to show off his stems, he covers most of them up with tube socks.
Venus Williams
Fur coat? Fantastic. The short skirt feels like a subtle tennis homage, and paired with the dark green, this fit fits the elder Williams incredibly well. Her hair almost looks angelic too. It all looks great, but I can't for the life of me understand who decided that shirt needed a pocket.
Everything about the outfit sparkles, but then there's just a basic envelope or Game of Thrones-banner looking pocket that draws away from the entire thing. Am I missing something? Probably. Do I care? No.
Simone Biles
Incredible. That is all I have to say. Everything feels like it flows together extremely well. My only gripe would be that the train flowing in the back seems bulky and heavy. Might be tough to drag that around for an entire night.
Sabrina Ionescu
When in doubt, go with the basics. No one will ever criticize a nice jacket, a slender black skirt, and a well-fitting top. That said, compared to the rest of the outfits we've seen tonight, this can't help but feel a bit underwhelming. Where are the extravagant sparkles? Diamonds only on the wrists and fingers? This feels like an outfit I'd see at a nice dinner. Albeit, she'd be far and away the best-dressed person at said dinner, but for the Met Gala, this feels rather tame.
Lewis Hamilton
Europeans love to claim that they have better fashion sense than Americans, and dad gummit, it's hard to argue that point after seeing Hamilton's outfit. Does he look like a stereotypical foreign dictator in a superhero film? Absolutely, but that attires goes dangerously hard in every one of those films.
Dwyane Wade
The vest here is immaculate. It's eye-catching, yet subtle. It's the first thing you see, but it's hidden behind the jacket, which looks great as well. The pants are pretty basic, but you can never go wrong with black slacks.
Unfortunately, this outfit falls apart with the undershirt. What even is that? A tuxedo T-shirt? Why even have an undershirt at that point? Wade is a former NBA All-Pro. He could have just had some of his pecs showing and it would've been great, instead, he's sitting there with a fake tie plastered looking like it was painted. It takes away from the rest of the outfit, which is fantastic, and for that, it is unforgivable.
Serena Williams
Now, this, I can get behind. The tail is certainly giving off "king-sized comforter" vibes, but the rest of the outfit seems godly. You could put Serena Williams in any Broadway play about the Greek, Roman, Egyptian, or Norse pantheons and she would fit right in. The transparent streak across the thigh as well –*chef's kiss,* brilliant.
Saquon Barkley
Hey, Saquon Barkley looks pretty good ... for a man attending junior prom. While the shoes are certainly shined enough for the Met Gala, the rest of the outfit seems pretty bland. I don't know if Barkley has a wedding to attend after this, but given how well everyone else is dressed, Barkley's fit is too basic for me to be impressed. Anyone can look good in a fitted black suit with a pocket square.
Joe Burrow
Now here's a suit I can appreciate. Top button undone to reveal a nice necklace, no pocket square but instead a fancy broach, square sunglasses. It all screams "I know how to dress well and you don't." That subtle arrogance is what makes Joe Burrow an elite quarterback, and it's clear he's not going anywhere any time soon.
Breanna Stewart
I don't know what's going on with her hair. It looks like a mix of Cruela de Vil, Brandon Routh's Superman, and the poster for A Nightmare Before Christmas. Keep in mind, I could never get my hair to look that good.
The rest of the ensemble is great though. The necklace hangs somewhat low, which looks nice, and while all-white can sometimes be too much, it isn't overwhelming for Stewart. The hat tilt is also a nice touch. All in all though, this feels like something that would be better suited for the Kentucky Derby instead of the Met Gala.
Angel Reese
I don't know which outfit I like more, Simone Biles' or Angel Reese's. This fit goes incredibly hard, mixing what I believe is both a traditional sleek look with a more modern design as well. The more I look at this outfit, the more I love it. I genuinely can't find one thing wrong with it. She looks remarkable.
Colin Kaepernick
Suits are always an easy choice, but a checkered red suit with a cloth over the back can be risky, yet Kaepernick pulls this off flawlessly. From the pin to the rings, to the singular button on the suit, it all works tremendously.
If I did have one gripe with this outfit, it'd have to be the collar. Why are the tips not pointed? I've never seen a squared off collar, and I'm not sure I ever want to see one again after this. Otherwise though, perfect.
Gabby Thomas
While I do love the beads dangling from whatever those sleeves are, the sleeves themselves are too wide. I (a man with no fashion sense) believe they would look better as soft fabric dangling on her elbow or lower tricep. Instead, they are out wide and probably make it tough for her to fit through doorways without scuffing the outfit.
It's a shame because the vest and outfit both look tremendous and she looks incredible in bright red, but I cannot get over those sleeves (or whatever they are called).
Sha'Carri Richardson
Given what we've seen Richardson wear in the past, this seems almost tame. But that doesn't mean it's bad. She looks the most elegant she ever has, and while pink and yellow can be tough to match, the colors match effortlessly here. The long, dark hair is also an incredible look that contrasts with the outfit extremely well. No complaints, just praise.
Justin Jefferson
I have not seen Sinners in theaters yet, but based on the few clips on TikTok I've received, I believe Justin Jefferson modeled his entire look off Michael B. Jordan. He looks like he runs a speak easy in the bayou. It's not bad, and it's certainly not bland, but I don't think Jefferson pulls off the baggy suit look as well as someone like Kaepernick did this year.
That said, the no-belt and high-waisted look on the pants are certainly working well for Jettas. I don't even mind the tie tucked into the pants which would normally give me an aneurysm. None of this outfit seems particularly bad, but none of it stands out either. I will give his outfit the edge over Saquon Barkley though, given its many non-traditional aspects.