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Volvo EX30 - long-term-review - Report No:3 2025

Volvo EX30 - long-term-review - Report No:3 2025

Top Gear3 days ago
Uh oh, it's happening. The machines are waking up. They've been quietly observing us, collating reams of data, surreptitiously offering non-threatening digital assistance in the expectation we'll let our guard down and give over.
Now, comfortable with their dominion, they've begun to chip away at more; a chance to claim a new boundary. They've discovered… criticism.
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Just the other day, Top Gear's long-term Volvo EX30 decided it wanted to make fun of me. It looked deep into my eyes, read my mind and my emotions as they manifested in my physical appearance and demeanour, searched my soul for essence it could mine, and – because it's just a machine – made a cold, calculated judgement.
'You look tired,' it said, as cold as an ice pick to the heart. 'You should take a break.'
Shocked. Shocked, I tell you. All I'd done was let out a little yawn and, in a heartbeat, the little yellow fun bus's driver alert monitor woke up and chose sarcasm.
Well yes, EX30, perhaps I look tired but that's what being old does to you. And a constant, low-level anxiety because of [gestures around] all of this. And it's not helped by a procession of beeps and bongs and overly sensitive assistance systems and patchy keyless entry. And there's nothing like a bit of sudden, unexpected braking that'll age you.
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