Love Island USA's Huda Has Her Issues—Being a Single Mom Isn't One of Them

Cosmopolitan

7 hours ago

The Love Island USA fans have identified an easy target. Since the first episode of season 7 aired, 24-year-old Huda Mustafa has arguably been the most consistent victim of the internet's anger. Now, it'd be one thing if the Huda hate train focused solely on her slightly possessive tendencies or her propensity to resort to misogynistic name-calling in moments when her coupling is threatened, but I've noticed that since the season premiere, the majority of the mocking and critiques about her have all oriented around one fact—she is, indeed, a single mother.
Before I get too sanctimonious, I must admit that I have found a bit (actually, a lot) of humor in the highly extra ways that Huda presents this info to her fellow Islanders. This woman loves a dramatic pause. And if I had to rank her mom reveals, I'd say Nic's reaction earned the top spot ('[You're] a mom of what? A dog? Like, in real life?'), while Jeremiah (the man she coupled up with on day one) had probably the most zoned-out response ('You're a mom? And you're 24?'). But beyond the fun clowning these moments get online, a pretty sinister narrative has emerged regarding Huda's reveals. People seem to think that somehow, they're some grand manipulation play. That by telling an islander she has a 4-year-old daughter at home, Huda is pulling some devious card out of her back pocket to garner their favor and sympathy after her villa offenses. And while there may be some hint of truth there, these takes negate the possibility that telling near-strangers you have a kid could be a genuinely anxiety-inducing admission and one that she might want to protect.
To be clear, I'm aware that Huda has not been the most graceful contestant so far. We are in week two, and she's already had a handful of meltdowns. She told another fellow islander about her child as she was trying to explain why she flipped off a bombshell who made out with Jeremiah during a challenge. And she revealed her mom status to Ace after it came out that (SPOILER INCOMING) Love Island voters opted to split up her couple with Jeremiah this past Sunday night, to defend herself against his claim that she's 'scamming' her way to victory by locking things in with Jeremiah so quickly. But we shouldn't look at those moments of vulnerability exclusively as nefarious exploitations of her motherhood. Maybe Huda's telling her fellow cast members she's a mom to provide a bit of context as to why she's taking everything so deeply on this silly little dating show.
Unfortunately, on top of the manipulation argument, some viewers have resorted to general mom-shaming to air their annoyance with Huda. Which is what I figured would happen as soon as Huda disclosed she'd be spending the summer away from her child. There are claims that her participation is irresponsible, like mothers have no place in a series like Love Island!
So everyone has feelings about whether Huda should be in the villa and how she should share her motherhood, but as one fellow young mom shared on a fan subreddit for the show, there's no one perfect way to go about it. 'I also had my daughter at 19, and when I was dating in my early 20s, [I] hid it until I felt like I could trust them/they cared enough. There's a ton of judgment and stigma that comes with being a young mom (or even being a mom period), so I always felt like I needed to protect my peace and my child before anything else. Explaining to others the who, what, where, when, why, and how is exhausting when you're young & new to dating as a mom. You are also still finding yourself.'
Despite my many frustrations with Huda, I've had sympathetic feelings while witnessing this discourse unfold. She's just a girl who wants to find love! And so many attacks on her feel based in something darker: a pretty widespread cultural belief that someone's motherhood renders someone undeserving of their identity and personhood outside of their child. As though having a kid means you no longer have the right to go on a reality show and act a bit rash and possessive.
So come for Huda's name-calling! Hold her accountable for the insecure moment when she did a backbend to call a girl who kissed Jeremiah a bitch (although that made for great television). Feel free to endlessly mock the scene when she freaked out about the less-than-perfect pancakes that Jeremiah made her. But targeting Huda's motherhood (and her hesitation to share it) feels like the lowest and easiest blow to make. That backlash doesn't read like attacks on Huda but single mothers at large, particularly ones who might have the audacity to go out and date. This is a free country (allegedly), and we all reserve the equal right to crash out on a dating show. Let her mistakes live separately from her motherhood. Let Huda (and all young single mothers) live.