Scientists reveal the surprising trick that could boost your relationship

Daily Mail​

3 days ago

When you've been to a dinner party with your partner, do you chat about the other guests on the way home?
If you do, you might have a happier relationship than those who simply discuss the week ahead, according to a new study.
Researchers asked 76 couples to wear a portable listening device which recorded their daily interactions.
Analysis revealed participants spent an average of 29 minutes per day gossiping with their significant other.
Gossip wasn't necessarily negative – the researchers defined it as simply talking about someone who wasn't physically present.
They discovered couples who gossiped more were likelier to be happier and reported higher relationship quality.
The team, from the University of California – Riverside, said gossiping may serve as a form of emotional bonding between partners.
'Negatively gossiping with one's romantic partner on the way home from a party could signal that the couple's bond is stronger than with their friends at the party, while positively gossiping could prolong the fun experiences,' the findings, published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, read.
When you've been to a dinner party with your partner, do you chat about the other guests on the way home? If so, scientists say you might have a better relationship (stock image)
'It may reinforce the perception that partners are 'on the same team,' enhancing feelings of connectedness, trust, and other positive relationship qualities, as well as contributing to overall well-being.'
The authors also suggest gossip may function as a 'social regulation tool', helping to establish expectations and behaviours that contribute to a harmonious relationship.
'Whether or not we want to admit it, everyone gossips,' first author Chandler Spahr, from the University of California – Riverside, said.
'Gossip is ubiquitous.'
The analysis also revealed that same-sex couples reported higher levels of happiness than different-sex couples.
Meanwhile, woman-woman couples produced the greatest amount of gossip.
The study is a follow-up to previous research, published in 2019, that dispelled some long-held gossip myths.
The previous work found that women don't engage in 'tear-down' gossip any more than men, and that lower-income people don't gossip more than wealthy people.
It also found that younger people engage in more negative gossip than older adults.
However, this is not the only study to have shown the psychological power of gossip.
Previous studies have shown that children start to gossip from the age of seven, and can be swayed by a single negative rumour about another child.
The study involved a group of 108 seven-year-old children who were shown videos of puppets who shared positive, neutral or negative gossip.
The children were then asked to give sticker 'rewards' to a separate group that the puppets in a video had been talking about.
Analysis revealed that hearing positive gossip from just one source wasn't enough to sway who they gave the stickers to, but positive gossip from multiple informants did.
However, a single piece of negative gossip was enough to make them decide not to give a sticker to that person.
Scientists say gossip helps individuals quickly acquire information about who is good or bad in their social circles.
The study found that some are eager to share false or exaggerated gossip, such as positive information to flatter a friend or a nasty rumour about an enemy.
But an excessive readiness to share gossip can also backfire and give the gossiper a bad social reputation.
To avoid this, researchers from the University of New Mexico found that peppering your gossip with a bit of concern – as opposed to nastiness – makes people see you as more likeable.
Those who injected concern rather than malice into their gossip were seen as more trustworthy and socially likeable.
DO MEN GOSSIP AS MUCH AS WOMEN?
A shocking recent study revealed that men gossip as much as women.
And far from behaving like gentlemen, they are more likely than their female counterparts to b**ch about workmates.
Researchers quizzed more than 2,200 people about their gossiping habits and found that males and females are equally likely to share tittle-tattle in the office.
But while women tend to talk supportively about colleagues, men try to run rivals down.
The researchers suggested that gossip gave women a way to compete in a non-physically threatening manner, while for men it helped build their self-confidence.
The study, published in March and carried out by Ariel University in Israel, asked participants to imagine describing a person they had just met to a friend and analysed the responses.
The authors concluded: 'Our findings suggest women and men engage in the same amount of gossiping activity, undermining invidious common stereotypes.
'The results indicated a statistically significant difference between genders, confirming that women's gossip is encoded with more positivity than that of men.'