Cricketer Amelia Kerr on how family saved her amid mental health battle
But after they surprised the young all-rounder with a lifesaving intervention that made her feel as if 'she was at her own funeral', their support became crucial to her ongoing management of anxiety and depression.
Kerr took her game to another level in 2024 to be crowned player of the tournament during New Zealand's maiden T20 World Cup title run, and the International Cricket Council's Women's Cricketer of the Year.
She was a prized pick-up for WBBL side the Sydney Sixers last season, after stints at the Brisbane Heat, and starred for the Mumbai Indians during their 2025 WPL title-winning season earlier this year.
But reaching these heights has been anything but easy for the 24-year-old, who began to bottle up her emotions in her late teens because she felt she should be grateful to be 'living out my childhood dream' playing for the White Ferns.
'I was also living with the belief that everything I did had to be perfect. I never gave myself a break,' Kerr told News Corp's Can We Talk? campaign, in partnership with Medibank.
'My thoughts started to consume me and my only escape, the only place where my mind was clear and I felt like I could breathe, was training.
'I would get up early, train all day, then go to the pool at night and do recovery, so all I needed to do was come home eat, shower and try to sleep.
'I tried to avoid my family because I didn't want them to see the pain I was in.'
Kerr said she believed that her loved ones couldn't fix her anguish, and therefore didn't want to burden them.
But in 2021, the floodgates opened after she was sent home from a White Ferns training camp.
Kerr said the decision angered her at the time, but she had since realised she 'had reached a crisis point' and needed 'serious help'.
Teammate and close friend Maddy Green flew back with Kerr to her hometown of Wellington, where her parents, sister (fellow White Ferns cricketer Jess), grandparents, aunties and uncles staged a second intervention.
A 10-minute, tear-filled speech by her dad, former Wellington player Robbie Kerr, was one of 'many powerful messages that night' that Kerr said gave her hope.
'I thought, 'My family need me here and I need to try get better for them',' she said.
'My family saved my life.
'They knew I was struggling, but they didn't quite know the degree.
'I was then taken to the crisis team at hospital (where) I spoke about how I was feeling. 'Everyone in that room was in tears.'
Weekly sessions with a psychiatrist, medication and close monitoring followed, allowing Kerr to 'feel safe for once'.
The talented bowler and batter also went public with her mental health battles when she pulled out of the White Ferns' 2021 tour of England.
While she was 'scared' to be so open, doing so 'was me standing up for something I am passionate about, so it can provide others with hope that things can get better'.
Kerr continues to manage her mental health through regular psychologist sessions, learning her 'warning signs' so she can ask for help before getting to a bad place, having a routine, practising gratitude and putting time towards activities that 'fill my cup' like exercise, being in nature, reading, playing guitar and being with loved ones.
She also created Treading Water – a series on her website, outoftherough.nz, in which 14 people share their stories of mental illness and recovery to 'help normalise those conversations'.
Importantly, Kerr and her family have built 'a relationship of trust' in which she feels comfortable to 'tell them how I feel, and for them to do the same'.
'The experiences we have shared have made us even closer and more grateful for life,' she said.
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