Six months' paternity leave is ridiculous – not all things have to be equal

Telegraph

19-05-2025

'Investing in early childhood'? Seems like a good idea. I keep being told that children are the future – which is a terrifying thought (they're so small, and they can't really do anything). Though not quite as terrifying as the idea of men being given six months' paternity leave.
Inspired by the Princess of Wales – who has been urging business leaders to support new parents as part of her work with the Royal Foundation Business Taskforce for Early Childhood – Deloitte is to give all new fathers at least six months off work… on full pay. Jazz hands please, no clapping, lest it upsets any of the sore-nippled, papoose-wearing baby daddies out there.
I shouldn't sneer. The consultancy firm is doing this, it says, in order to increase its number of female partners. Which would obviously be a positive. In the UK, women still only constitute 37 per cent of partners in law firms, while accountancy firms have just 18 per cent women in partner roles, so in theory at least (we'll get to the inconvenient truths shortly), policies like this one might help give those figures a stimulus. Deloitte, I should point out, is also the first member of 'the big four' – which also includes Ernst & Young, KPMG and PricewaterhouseCoopers – to address the impact of unequal parental leave on working mothers' career progression. So far, so saintly. But I have a few follow-up questions.
First, you do realise that it's totally unfeasible for small or even medium-sized businesses to embrace this policy? It won't, in fact, boost any figures other than our ballooning 'out of office' statistics.
Just under a quarter of the working-age population (those aged 16-64) do not currently have a job. That's about 11 million people. So, is now really the time to be devising fresh incentives for Britons not to work? Is carving out a whole new 'economically inactive' demographic (to add to the chronically work-shy brigade and the cynical 'mental health' hijackers) really the way to get the UK back on track, boost economic growth alongside living standards, and improve social outcomes? Because, while I'm sure that the bambino benefits from the presence of his daddy in those first few precious months, the state of the country he or she grows up in is also, arguably, going to be important.
Second (and I've been a bit slow on the uptake here), since it turns out that you don't have to be the 'primary caregiver' to qualify for paternity leave, what are these men actually going to be doing for half a year? I can't help but think of a couple I knew, who would leave the dinner party table together, mid-meal, to breastfeed their baby. When I asked the husband why that was, he explained that he was 'there to support' his wife. Which was quite lovely, I told him, thinking: 'I have no words'. Those early months can be lonely, it's true (although in my case it was a good kind of lonely – the best), but what would six months of a husband-turned- doula do to a woman's mental health, I wonder? Or the country's divorce statistics?
If we're spinning this thing out to farcical levels, why stop at husbands? Last July, Sweden rolled out a new law that allows parents to transfer some of their paid parental leave to grandparents, so let's get Nana and Grandad on the gravy train too. Let's get the aunties and the uncles involved, the nieces and the nephews. How are we going to pay for all this leave? We can't get bogged down with that. I don't even have to read the Business Taskforce for Early Childhood's newly released report to know that the more family members you are surrounded by in early life, the better your… everything.
Idealism isn't, in fact, the problem. You can aim for the stars without getting caught up in our toddler-esque fixation with 'fairness'. It's not fair that women have periods, babies, the menopause. It's not fair that a womb and breasts can negatively impact a woman's career. And I'm all for trying to level the playing field wherever possible. I can even understand the need to 'challenge' the 'primary parent' model, just so long as we're clear that, in general – and until men can bear children and breastfeed – that 'primary parent' will remain the mother.
'Deloitte's decision to give men six months of fully paid leave isn't just about families – it's about the future of work,' wrote one mummy blogger yesterday. If the future of work is extended periods of paid non-work, we're going to have much bigger problems than the gender gap.