3 moms reveal how their kids' lives changed after moving out of the US

Business Insider

22-07-2025

Makayla Oberlin wanted more time with her kids — so she moved to a new time zone.
"There were never mornings really consistently where we could both get up with our kids and get them ready for school and cook breakfast and just be the family that I always wanted to be," Oberlin, 36, told Business Insider. The mom of three moved from Texas to Panama in April.
Oberlin's husband had served in the Army for 12 years, so her family was used to moving, but she said it made it difficult for both her and her husband to be fully present for their kids. They began researching affordable destinations abroad where they could get by without working while their kids were in school, and they ultimately settled on Panama.
"It was really just, how can we do what we want to do for our family properly? And so we knew leaving the States would give us the opportunity to live off of what we had, where we could just be present with our kids," Oberlin said.
BI spoke to three moms who moved abroad with their families. They described the unique challenges that accompany moving to a new country with younger kids, especially when it means leaving other family and friends behind. Still, the moves were overall beneficial — they said that there were more educational and career opportunities for their kids outside the US, and they could enjoy a more affordable life.
Here's how the three families transitioned with their kids to new lives outside the US.
Texas to Panama
One of Oberlin's top priorities for her kids was to immerse them in Panamanian culture, and learning Spanish was a key way to do that. Oberlin researched and toured a range of schools in Panama and enrolled her kids in one that offered a mix of Spanish and English classes.
Most of the classes are primarily in Spanish, and her kids have a classmate who helps translate anything they don't understand.
"It's been going really well, but definitely different," Oberlin said. In her observation, language learners in the US are often moved to a different classroom with a separate teacher. In contrast, she wanted her kids to learn by immersion and be an integrated part of their school."They are truly thrown in and acclimated from day one," she said.
Leaving Texas was difficult for her 14-and 12-year-old sons; Oberlin said they were apprehensive about moving away from their friends and nervous about learning Spanish. With her youngest daughter being 10 years old, Oberlin said she's still at the age "where everything was just fun" and viewed the move as an adventure.
While they're still working to adjust to the new culture, Oberlin said she's already impressed with the educational opportunities her kids can access as they get older. She said that the Panama school offers international university advising once kids hit high school, in which they invite universities from all over the world to speak with students.
In contrast, she said, most US schools teach a standard life formula: "You go to high school, you go to college, and you stay here and you get a job, and this is where you are," Oberlin said. "Whereas here, I feel like they truly are expanding their horizons, where they could go anywhere in the world to college, and they could do anything. So I definitely do think it's more globally aware for them."
Maryland to New Zealand
A lot went into Elissa Johnsen's decision to move from Maryland to New Zealand in 2022. Johnsen was working as a nurse during the start of the pandemic, which took a severe mental toll. On top of that, there was a school shooting at the high school right next to her daughter's elementary school in 2020, and Johnsen said the frequent lockdown drills were weighing her daughter down emotionally.
Around that time, Johnsen said she received a recruiting email from a New Zealand-based agency looking for nurses. While it initially seemed like an unattainable dream, she and her husband started seriously considering the offer, and they ultimately made the move when her youngest child was 11 months old.
"Everything we read about New Zealand felt like a dream, the natural beauty, the cultural values, the emphasis on work-life balance, and a school system that seemed to put child well-being first," Johnsen told BI in an email.
Her kids are now 4, 5, and 10, and she said that the school system in New Zealand is more well-rounded than the US. Johnsen said that the preschools follow a "play-based curriculum" built on well-being and relationships. While primary school still follows core curriculum, "it's balanced with outdoor play, culturally responsive teaching, and a whole-child approach," she said.
"As someone who's now seen both systems up close, I'm struck by how much more relaxed and emotionally safe my younger two are," Johnsen said. "It feels like they're actually getting a childhood, something my oldest, in her early U.S. school years, missed out on."
Expenses in New Zealand also aren't as burdensome as they were in the US. Johnsen said she takes home more of her paycheck and has affordable health insurance, and day care is significantly more affordable. In the US, she said she was quoted $1,500 per child for part-time day care, while she gets 20 hours of free childcare in New Zealand a week. While the cost of living in New Zealand is comparable to what she paid in the US, lower childcare and insurance costs make it manageable.
"I think it's important to say that this choice isn't easy or cheap," Johnsen said. "Moving across the world with three young kids meant letting go of everything familiar and building a life from the ground up. We questioned ourselves often in the beginning. And even now, we miss family deeply, visiting the U.S. is financially and logistically hard. But we don't regret it for a second."
Minnesota to Belgium
Ahnika White, 32, moved from Minnesota to Belgium in September 2024, and she was fortunate that her kids were already familiar with living abroad.
Her husband is from the Netherlands, and her oldest daughter lived there for the first few years of her life before moving back to the US. As her daughter was finishing preschool in Minnesota, White said she was uncomfortable enrolling her in a US school due to the prevalence of school shootings. While juggling medical bills and other expenses, she and her husband decided that going back to Europe was their best bet.
When her husband landed a job in Belgium, they made the move with their two kids.
"Financially, we're way better off here," White said. "It was taking a toll on us in the US, between mortgages, and kids are really expensive. Those bills rack up really quickly."
Her daughter's background with speaking Dutch also allowed her to largely avoid the typical language barrier that accompanies moving abroad. White said that while the schools in Belgium use a different dialect, it was fairly easy for her daughter to adjust.
She said she plans to stay in Belgium at least until her kids graduate from high school. She's setting money aside for both of her kids that they can use after they turn 18, either for college or a different route that they choose to pursue.
"A lot of people are so worried about moving their kids and uprooting their kids, which is such a valid concern," White said. "But we've taken my daughter from continent to continent now, and they're so resilient and they adapt. And so I wouldn't let that be a reason why you don't make the move."