Jordan Chiles, Aly Raisman and the benefits of ‘mutual mentorship'

New York Times

18-04-2025

Editor's Note: This story is a part of Peak, The Athletic's new desk covering leadership, personal development and success through the lens of sports. Peak aims to connect readers to ideas they can implement in their own personal and professional lives. Follow Peak here.
Standing in the lobby of a Vancouver hotel, Jordan Chiles had her head on a swivel as she pressed send on another text to her friend, gymnast Ragan Smith.
OK, I'm in the lobby, can you come downstairs?
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Chiles, days away from turning 13, was in town to watch the 2014 Pacific Rim Championships, a major international gymnastics competition held every two years. An aspiring and eager gymnast with natural talent, Chiles wanted to wish her friends good luck: Smith, Simone Biles and in particular 19-year-old Aly Raisman, one of the more experienced gymnasts with whom she shared several similarities. Often given Raisman's assignments during practices, Chiles felt honored to have recently learned her famous tumbling pass. But there was one problem with her plan.
'Everything was very, very strict during that time frame,' Chiles said. 'For them to even want to see me was a huge thing.'
Once she made it upstairs and into Raisman's room, thanks to some help from Smith, Chiles didn't have a plan other than to just show her support.
'Hey girly!' Chiles said. 'What's up!'
'Oh my gosh,' Raisman said. 'How did you get in our hotel room?'
'Don't worry about it. I'm here!'
Over the next 10 years, the two formed a close bond, with the seven-year age difference inciting a mentorship dynamic early on. Raisman's veteran presence and variety of experiences led Chiles to take advice from her seriously. She learned from Raisman how to navigate unfamiliar situations and that it was OK to do things differently. To Chiles, Raisman's perspective was unique and comforting.
Over time, though, something else happened: Raisman started to learn and benefit from Chiles, too.
Their relationship is what Jennifer Jordan, a professor of leadership and organizational behavior at the Institute for Management Development in Switzerland, calls a 'perfect example of mutual mentorship.'
The idea is that a healthy mentorship should actually be a two-way street. While the benefits may initially be one-sided, both people should eventually feel the relationship has contributed to their development in some way. And while the mentee's benefits are often more obvious, the mentor is also able to learn and gain new perspectives and ideas.
'That openness to learning, that support, that sharing of information, it's essentially leadership,' Jordan said. 'I wouldn't even say it makes them better leaders. What they're doing is showing leadership through this relationship.'
As one of the younger gymnasts at national training camp each month, Chiles' humor would occasionally score her an invitation to the older girls' cabin. A self-described jokester, she connected with her teammates quickly, including Raisman. Following practices at the ranch, their conversations grew longer, especially as the pressure crept in.
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'The training,' Raisman said, 'was so intense.'
Using her own experiences to guide Chiles through the pre-practice jitters and doubts, Raisman wanted to be a source of encouragement.
Look, I've been in your shoes before. I understand everything you're going through. You've got this.
'She just has that knowledge,' Chiles said. 'An understanding of what it's like. And how it's been.'
She joked that much of Raisman's wisdom can be found underneath the alter ego her teammates gave her years ago: Grandma Aly.
'Aly is just a very old soul,' Chiles said. 'That's how I see it. An old soul type of girl. When you have somebody like that, you can get a different perspective of what your sport can be. And you can navigate it differently then.'
One day at the ranch, Chiles was sitting outside her cabin in between practices, laughing with some of the other younger gymnasts. While they were talking, the door to another cabin opened and Raisman walked out.
'Guys, I'm trying to sleep,' she said. 'Can you keep it down a little?'
Chiles and the other girls looked around at one another.
'We couldn't stop laughing,' Chiles said.
In countless ways, Raisman forged her own path, never worrying about whether she was untraditional or not. Chiles clung to messages like that.
'She has taught me so many things about what it's like to be not a common gymnast,' Chiles said. 'She wasn't like everybody else. She had her own ways. And she embraced those and made sure that those were the things she was authentic to because that's who she is.'
That message has manifested itself in Chiles' career decisions, like making changes in her coaching and training, as well as choosing to be bold while competing. At the most recent Olympic Trials in Minneapolis in June, she was interacting with the crowd in between her events, causing much of the audience to join her in clapping and dancing.
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Raisman, who retired from international competition in 2020, watched from the stands.
'It made me so happy to see,' Raisman said. 'I think Jordan shows people that you can be authentically yourself and it's also helping her be the best gymnast she can be.'
For Raisman, having a personality like Chiles' around was a refreshing source of positivity. She found her attitude 'really inspiring' and tried to absorb her energy, wanting to learn from her ability to put a positive spin on any situation.
'Even when I was younger, and Jordan was younger than me, I still would go to Jordan,' she said. 'It doesn't matter someone's age.'
At a competition before the 2016 Olympics, Raisman was getting ready for vault while battling a bout of anxiety. Chiles, who was in the stands, came over to talk to her.
'You become so close that you can almost communicate with a look,' Raisman said.
Like Raisman had done for her so many times, Chiles offered words of encouragement.
You know how to do this. Take it one thing at a time. Just be you. Aly, nobody can take this away from you. You shine in so many ways. This is the hardest thing and you just have to keep pushing.
Chiles had always offered that support and comfort to Raisman. Before competing at Olympic Trials in 2016, amid the nerves and stress, Raisman saw Chiles, who was there just to watch the competition. The two hugged. Raisman looked at Chiles and said, 'You're my good luck charm.'
Chiles, now a junior at UCLA and one of the top gymnasts in the country, is trying to pass down what Raisman did for her to other young gymnasts.
'The encouraging words that she has told me, I have told to the younger generation,' she said. 'It's like when somebody loves you in a way that you want to be able to love others the same way.'
The power of Raisman's influence is still there. At a college meet in January, Chiles was about to compete when she looked over and saw Raisman, who was there to broadcast the competition. Raisman was nervous, as she usually is when she commentates. Before Chiles performed, she walked over to Raisman and smiled.
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'Aly,' she said, 'You're my good luck charm this time.'
A small thing, but it was exactly what each of them needed to hear to relax. Chiles crushed her events. Raisman felt less nervous.
'It's a moment of supporting each other in whatever stage we are in life,' Raisman said. 'It's very special. I feel very grateful for that.'
Elise Devlin is a writer for Peak, The Athletic's new desk covering leadership, personal development and success. She last wrote about Tara VanDerveer's curiosity as a leader. Follow Peak here.
(Illustration: Kelsea Petersen / The Athletic; Ronald Martinez / Getty Images, Jamie Squire / Getty Images)