Nottingham attack survivor: I wish I'd died
A survivor of the Nottingham stabbings has told how she wishes the killer had taken her instead of the two young students who 'had their lives ahead of them'.
Sharon Miller was walking to work on the morning of June 13, 2023 when she was hit by a van driven by Valdo Calocane in the city centre.
Calocane had already fatally stabbed university students Barnaby Webber and Grace O'Malley-Kumar, both 19, and school caretaker Ian Coates, 65, an hour earlier.
Ms Miller and two other pedestrians, Wayne Birkett and Marcin Gawronski, who were also struck by the van, were left seriously injured.
In an interview with BBC East Midlands Today, Ms Miller said it was the emotional damage and the guilt of surviving that weighed heaviest.
'When I heard what had happened to Barnaby or Grace, I thought, 'I wish he'd took me instead of them',' Ms Miller, 46, said.
'They were so young and still had their lives ahead of them – you just feel so guilty.'
'You should be able to go to work, and they should be able to walk around. Ian should have been able to get into his van and go to work. It's just so wrong.'
Mr Birkett, 61, who suffered a traumatic brain injury and lost all memory of the attack and of his life before it, echoed the same feeling: 'I would have swapped my life for one of those poor students – without a doubt.'
The forklift driver spent more than six weeks in hospital and has had to relearn how to read, eat and perform basic tasks.
'It's horrible not having any memory,' he said. 'My legs hurt all the time, my back hurts, I get headaches all the time.'
Ms Miller, who had been heading to her job as a cleaner when she was hit, said: 'I saw the van, and the next minute I'm in the air. I thought I was dying – all I could see was white.'
She broke five ribs, injured her spleen and was left with a badly infected leg wound.
'I'm still in a lot of pain,' she said. 'I don't like going out. I was never like that before.'
Calocane, who had paranoid schizophrenia, was sentenced to an indefinite hospital order in January after admitting three counts of manslaughter on the grounds of diminished responsibility, and three counts of attempted murder.
Ms Miller and Mr Birkett are among those expected to give evidence to a public inquiry into the attacks, chaired by Judge Deborah Taylor.
Their solicitor, Greg Almond, said: 'They want to put their story across and make sure they're not forgotten survivors.'
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