Teachers Share Ways They Beg Parents To Get Involved
Here's what they said:
"Discipline your children so that they can learn in the classroom."
"Potty train your child! Second graders should not be pooping their pants daily. Take them to the doctor or I have to report."
"University admin here. I'd say, I wish parents would empower students to fight their own battles. If a student doesn't get a job on campus, I see parents calling to ask why and for feedback."
"BE. A. PARENT. Do NOT expect a phone, tablet, or PS4 to raise your kid for you!"
"Kindergarten parents who don't reinforce proper letter formation practice at home or even the correct use of scissors to cut with the thumb up are disappointing."
"Give them consequences."
"As a teacher in a suburban area, I wish parents would stop putting their children in every sport possible all year long. Families are maxed out, going from softball to baseball to basketball, spending entire weekends at their children's tournaments."
"YOU are their first teachers in life. Children listen to their parents, whether you realize it or not. They pick up on your habits, your words, and your attitude."
"To be clear, I don't believe that these things have happened because the parents don't care (in the majority of cases), but the fact that so many young women have not only shared these experiences but also said things like 'I didn't tell anyone before now because I thought I'd get in trouble/wouldn't be taken seriously/would disappoint my parents' is concerning."
"I'm an elementary teacher with 17 years of experience. I'm so tired of parents bailing their kids out of everything and getting upset at the teacher when they give consequences. Parents do their child's homework for them, or the children simply don't hand in anything. Kids tell me their parents said they don't have to do it."
"Put down your phone and model healthy relationships with technology."
"Brush their teeth. At least half of my class has rotten teeth."
"Secondary school teacher (UK version of high school) of 16 years here. Parents need to realise that, statistically, most people are average. Therefore, achieving an average grade is not a negative."
"Understand each of their children is unique and shouldn't be compared to siblings."
"I'm always shocked by the number of parents who don't talk to their children."
"History teacher here! I know most teachers wish that parents would read to their young children more, and while I also wish for that, I sometimes wish that parents would watch more TV and movies with their kids. Media is so important for kids to understand their place in history and understand how the world works, but so many kids don't even watch TV anymore, they just watch TikTok and YouTube."
"Monitor what they are watching on TV and on the internet."
"Teach your kids to own up to their actions."
"5th grade math and science teacher and first year working. I wish every day that parents would instill responsibility and ownership in their kids at home so they can bring it to school. If I had a nickel every time a student gave up less than two seconds in problem solving, but then got absolutely destroyed emotionally when they got poor grades, I wouldn't be underpaid."
"Teach your child that no means NO."
"I'm always shocked by the number of parents who don't talk to their children."
"After 27 years in early child education, I've seen parents allow their child to walk all over them or show them how to be a bully at 3 years old. I've seen parents have zero expectations for their child's behavior, and I've seen parents hold their child back from reaching developmental milestones and age-appropriate socialization, resulting in a child who is bored in the classroom because they are older compared to their peers."
"NO social media allowed before age 16, especially TikTok!"
"Go over their homework with them every night."
"Just simply understand that if we are reaching out to you, it is because we need your help. It's not to judge you or your parenting. Actually, the opposite. We know your influence and need your help to guide your child in the right direction."
"I'm a counselor so I see things a bit different, but I can't tell you how many calls I've gotten from parents concerned about their child fighting or arguing with their siblings (who go to my school as well and at school are perfectly fine with each other), asking me if I can intervene."
"Drop them off on time (within reason, of course. If your child has a doctor's appointment, a family event, etc, everyone understands!) so that they can start the day with the rest of their class."
"Check the backpack, read the emails, and add the events to your calendar at the beginning of the year."
And finally, "The simplest thing you can do is be there for your children."
Now we want to hear from you. Teachers, tell us how you wish parents got more involved in their child's education in the comments. Or, if you'd like to remain anonymous, use the Google form below. Your response could be featured in an upcoming post.
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That lasted a few hours. She used every room, ignored the child all day, took tables, lamps, and even drawers from a desk in one of the rooms, and piled everything on top of each other in the closet. She did not put the room back together. Every morning, they would go out and come back with coffee, and she would eat something hidden in a little bag. They never asked us if we wanted anything or offered to take us out for a meal or contribute a single thing. To top it all off, she hid my dog's favorite toy in a Halloween decorations box in a closet. I discovered it last Halloween! It was so easy saying no to their request to come back for a few days this month, now with a 3-year-old and a 5-month-old. They are extremely wealthy but clueless." "Around 20 years ago, my (now ex) husband's brother was moving from California to New York and asked if he could stay with us for three days between when he gave up his apartment until he was scheduled to leave. No problem. He didn't mention he'd be bringing his cat. I was highly allergic to cat dander. Tears would stream down my face from the time I got home at night until I left for work again in the morning. I bought some Benadryl and decided to tough it out because it was only for three days. Six months later, he was still there. He made a mess, was disrespectful of our need for sleep, and never cleaned or contributed in any way, even though we both worked full time while trying to get our own business off the ground." "One of my son's friends' girlfriend came over to my house for a few drinks. When I left to use the bathroom, I came back to the kitchen to find her with her pants down and peeing in the sink! WTH?!" "I gave a young friend a wedding shower. I'm a pretty good cook/hostess, so I went all out on the food and drinks. I set up a buffet with many choices and a drink station (no alcohol). My friend's future aunt was in front of me at the buffet. She ate a chocolate-covered strawberry and put the stem on the buffet. I didn't say anything until she tasted a dip and then put the spoon back in the dip. I was furious. I told her to pick up the stem and put it on her plate, and if she wanted to know how something tasted, she should put some on her plate and use her own spoon to taste it from there. Of course, I removed the dip." "In my early 20s, after college, a few friends and I had an apartment in Boston. One of our other close friends lived at home after college but would come and stay with us during the weekend and stay over after hitting the bars/nightclubs with us. He was usually a good guest. However, after a while, he got too comfy at our place. One weekend, he got sick from drinking too much, puked on our wood floors, and cleaned it by wiping it up with old newspaper. No soap or cleansers! Another weekend, he held a party at our place for some of his other friends without asking for our blessing or inviting us! He just had guests come over for a party he threw at our house!" "Some family came for Thanksgiving for the first time. They brought their dog (without we have cats) and lots of drugs. The entire five days were a drunken drug fest with their dog lying all over our furniture and in our bed and chasing our pets. They were drunk and stoned the entire time while fighting and giving each other the silent treatment. Happy Thanksgiving. Never again!" "My partner's daughter came from out of town and stayed with us. She is over 40 and rudely bossed her father around every day. She stayed in our guest bedroom, which had been my deceased daughter's bedroom. I kept many of her things in the dresser and closet. One morning, she came downstairs and informed me she was bored the previous evening and went through all my daughter's belongings. She had the nerve to ask for a Gucci handbag that she had taken down from the top shelf in the closet. I was speechless and asked for an apology. Didn't happen." "Friends of my ex-husband stayed with us between moving houses. I came home earlier than expected and found the wife leaving with a cooler of meat from my freezer. Her sister was 'facing hard times' and needed it. They could have actually stayed with her because she had room, but our place was 'nicer.'" "My ex-roommate invited a friend to sleep on our couch for a few weeks…without asking me first. I went along with it despite the rough start. The guest decided to help herself to our food and constantly left the front door unlocked, so I counted the days until she was gone. One Saturday morning, I was rudely awakened by the sound of a vacuum running before 6:00 a.m. However, my vacuum was still broken from the last bad roommate! I walked into the common area to see the house guest blowing up my air mattress with a strange guy. They popped my air mattress before 6:00 a.m. on a Saturday!" "A relative of my foster mother's would come over whenever she liked and tie up the phone for hours. Even if no one were home, she'd let herself in (doors were never locked) and go straight to the phone! If we were home, no one was allowed to do anything other than sit still and be quiet until she finished. Bathroom trips were the only escape allowed. It was considered impolite to leave while she was on the phone!" "My best friend from high school and her husband asked if they could stay with us on their way from Florida to northern Michigan. It was no problem until I came home from work to find she had gone through all my drawers and jewelry and set aside pieces she wanted me to give her! Her husband warned her I wouldn't like it, but she assured him we shared everything. I was mortified at the invasion of my privacy and snatched my things up. She kept bugging me to give her a certain pin. I was really mad. That was the last time I left her alone in my home." "We met a seemingly nice couple while traveling in Turks and Caicos. We dined and visited a few places on the island since we had a rental car. The other couple was staying a day longer and wondered if we wanted to leave the car with them. Uh, no. We needed it to get to the airport. The next thing we knew, they said they would be traveling through our town and suggested they visit us. We accommodated them, and even though they knew we had a 14-year-old son at home, the wife traveled back and forth from their guest room to the bath next to my son's room in a bra and underwear. Not appropriate!" "My husband's cousin and his wife stayed with us for nearly a week. They had bottles of cheap wine in their suitcases and drank continually. We bought and prepared all the meals and would open a bottle of wine, but we were lucky to get one glass before they finished it off. Everywhere we went, they would stand back from the cashier, even when visiting a museum that they requested to visit, and would wait for us to open our wallets. They insisted on dropping into Trader Joe's before they left to buy as many bottles of cheap wine as they could fit into their suitcase. We did speak to them about their drinking, but they shrugged it off. I don't know which was more annoying, their unwillingness to offer to pay for anything or their unwillingness to open a bottle of wine and share with us. We stayed with them previously and paid for everything, by the way." "We lived in the country and had a beautiful view. One of my husband's work colleagues asked if she could have her 'very tiny' wedding at our house because it was her dream setting. She promised it was just a couple of immediate family members. Turns out there were over 100 people. We came home to patio furniture in the pool, not one sheet remaining of our toilet paper or paper towels, ruined bath towels, a backed-up septic system, mud all over the kitchen countertops, and a garage filled with trash. I wouldn't treat a cheap motel that badly!" "When I was a kid, whenever we went on holiday, my grandma would pop in to feed the cat, water plants, etc. We'd return every time to find she had rearranged the living room furniture! The first few times, my mum was furious. After that, it became a running joke. She would move stuff around, but only little things, to see if we'd notice. It's still a bit annoying, but much less so than having to re-rearrange the living room when you've got a bunch of holiday laundry to deal with!" "Against my better judgment (and the advice of my own mother), I let my sister, her husband, and her young son stay with us when they lost their apartment. They had lost multiple apartments because they would stay without paying rent until the landlord figured out a way to kick them out. But she was family, and I couldn't turn her away. While there, they would hide their own food in their room, but eat all our food. At the time, we were installing wood flooring in the living room, so the rule was that there would be no eating or drinking in the living room. I would get up in the morning (because I had to go to work early, so they were still up when I went to bed), and there would be the wrappers from Icy Pops in the living room, so obviously, that rule was ignored." "My husband's aunt and teenage cousin asked to stay with us for two nights (Sunday to Tuesday). I wanted to make them feel welcome, so I made a big dinner both nights, complete with homemade apple pie and crumb cake (my specialty). I also made breakfast and lunch for them, and rescheduled my 2-year-old daughter's gym classes so I could spend time with them. Things were okay, but my husband and I were slightly disappointed because they were sloppy, ate all our food, etc., and never offered to contribute anything. The cousin actually drank an entire gallon of milk and ate all of the homemade chocolate chip cookies I had made. When I asked the aunt to watch my daughter while I ran out to buy more milk, she said no!" "My mom used to have a bestie from school days. At some point, her friend and her adult friend's son stayed with us because he had to apply for a military school in our city. Long story short, they stayed the entire summer, they wrecked our phone bill, they had the AC on 24/7 ( of course, never did they pay for anything ), and when they finally left, her husband suggested that my mom and I stay in one of their summer houses (they were extremely wealthy) during our hollidays. We accepted it, but her son decided to let his pit bull attack my dog during our stay. I rescued my dog at the last minute, and I told him that he was mean by nature and a douchbag. We stopped talking with them until my mom died. Her friend came to the ceremony, where she decided to tell me that my dead dad wasn't my real dad and that my dead mom should have told me years ago. By the way, my face is identical to my father's." "I don't know if this counts as a house guest because it was someone I met at a bar, took home, and haven't seen since that night. I don't even remember his name or if I ever knew it. Lucky for him, because he somehow ordered hundreds of dollars worth of porn on my cable TV account at some point?! I guess he did it while I was using the bathroom because nothing else about that night was good enough to hold my attention long enough for him to do that unnoticed. Lucky for ME, Comcast gave me the benefit of the doubt and refunded the charges because I had never ordered anything like that before." "When my husband and I moved into our new house, my brother-in-law asked if his family (his girlfriend, their kid, and their dog) could rent out the basement until they had saved up to get an apartment. We said okay. At first, it was okay. Then, their dog got pregnant because they hadn't spayed her. She gave birth, and they didn't lift a finger to help with seven pups. My husband and I paid for all the food and vet bills. We raised, cleaned, socialized, and found homes for them. That's only the start. We asked them to use the shed outside to smoke weed and not smoke in the house. They didn't care. They not only smoked inside, but the girlfriend smoked 24/7 until she made herself physically ill from so much weed and vomited all over our floor. They both refused to clean the puke and let it sit for days until my husband cleaned it. This happened multiple times." "My wife's sister, who lives 11 hours away, likes to travel. She has money and occasionally talks about how much she has in the bank. Travel is a fun pastime, but instead of hotels, she regularly finds distant relatives, friends, etc., to stay with. Last summer, she rented her house for a week, so she had no place to stay, and then asked if she could stay with us for a few days. We said no problem. After the first three days, she asked if she could stay longer and if her son could come too and sleep on the couch for a few days. Once again, we said okay. She then added that her son's new girlfriend would also be staying. The short stay turned into a week. Despite having money for dinners, drinks, etc., they never contributed to any food. My wife accepted this behavior since her sister has always been like this." "My live-in boyfriend at the time invited his friend and his friend's family of four (plus two dogs) to stay at my two-bedroom apartment for a weekend. Mind you, he did not pay rent or share any household expenses. I politely reminded him of my apartment complex's no-dog rule and expected him to tell his friends to stay elsewhere. I came home from work to find them, their dogs, and their luggage in my living room. I reluctantly set up the air bed and kicked my kid out of her bedroom so they could stay in it." And: "We met a middle-aged, single, Australian man while on a trip to Britain. Two years later, he called to say he was coming for a visit to Canada. We told him clearly that I, now working full time, was also dealing with both my mother and father in the hospital, who were dying. We had no idea that he intended to crash with us for free for three weeks, and he expected his meals on time, his laundry done, and free transportation everywhere, to whatever he wanted to see. He was also continually rude and abusive to my husband, who was only attempting to get him to pitch in for costs and allow me precious time with my parents. Our future travels have not included sharing addresses or phone numbers with others we meet." Have you ever had a horrible house guest? What did they do? Tell us in the comments or share anonymously using this form. Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
