Barry Sheehan: When it comes to hearing the team, there's a game of cat and mouse between players and parents

Irish Times

5 days ago

Barry Sheehan, father of Lions and Ireland hooker
Dan
, will be contributing to
The Irish Times throughout the tour of Australia
Australia
has been a revelation. This is our first meeting, and it has been a really welcoming, head-turner of a country that makes you feel right at home in an instant. Stuff works and as a rule things are labelled or explained in literal and simple terms. For example, Jetty Road is the road that unsurprisingly leads to the Jetty; and the sunshine coast is sunny.
The only exception to the labelling rule so far has been Melbourne. If the rule was applied consistently Melbourne would be called Sport City – then it would be doing exactly what it says on the tin.
Fine sports clubs are dotted everywhere. Tennis's place of worship is in Melbourne Park and pays due recognition to Rod Laver and Margaret Court with purpose-built facilities. The rowing clubs on the south bank of the Yarra are right in the centre of the city and their crews can be seen on the river daily. The Marvel Stadium hosted the
Lions
in their midweek game on Tuesday evening. A fine indoor arena again in the middle of the city.
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The city's sporting cathedral, however, is the truly magnificent MCG. The C could easily stand for Colosseum such is the scale of the place. Any amount of sporting drama has been played out here, including the 1956 Olympics.
Aussie Rules dominates Melbourne and is the only subject for conversation with the locals. There are four teams that use the MCG as their home ground. It works, and means that there are games from Thursday to Sunday most weeks.
In between Lions games there are days to fill, so our group of Lions parents, who
support their sons from the shadows
, attended the AFL match in the MCG on Thursday evening. This mid-table match attracted a crowd of 56,000 and served as a type of captain's run for the 'shadows', allowing us to get a feel for the place.
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Dan Sheehan on the Lions tour so far: 'I've enjoyed absolutely every second of it'
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We chatted among ourselves, seeking any little nuggets of insight or wisdom about how the main men were getting on. Of course, our only sources are own main men. And, to a man, they give nothing away.
All the shadows know this game. We are permanently left in the dark, which is exactly where they want us. We know to never ask direct questions, so instead we have become adept at crafting techniques to get something more than the dreaded one-word answer or, even worse, a single thumbs-up emoji reply. This is a never-ending game of cat and mouse.
In addition to parents, other family members continue to swell our ranks. Any number of uncles, aunts and cousins have appeared. The most valuable are those who live here in Australia because they know where this country's treasures are to be found.
There are very impressive siblings here supporting their brothers. All of them have significant ambitions, dreams and achievements of their own, yet here they are on the other side of the world happy to support their brothers. There are plenty more back home or farther away pursuing their own dreams and shining brightly. They too are all-in on the support.
Parental shadowing is a delicate matter for fear of it being misinterpreted as favouritism. The supportive sibling makes it a pleasure.
Lions fans at the MCG last Saturday for the Australia-Lions clash, not a concert. Photograph: Tom Maher/Inpho
By Friday the city is packed. The tide is in on a sea of red. Supporters mill around the city high on expectations for the main event on Saturday. It begins to resemble the start of a hunt – supporters in their red gather, and they all appear to be waiting in a metaphorical yard. The museums, art galleries, coffee shops and lunch spots are places to linger.
At 5pm an inaudible but universal horn is blown, and suddenly the hunt is on for the pubs and bars. Hunters jump fences and gallop for position, encouraging each other along the way. The night is long, and the craic is great.
Saturday dawns. Evening kickoffs make for a long day. A wander around Fitzroy and a quiet lunch fills the time. A route to the game via Lansdowne Street provides a welcome feel of familiarity. The MCG is the heart of the prematch show – it beats and bounces and generates a super atmosphere from well before kick-off.
And so, it came to pass. The Lions hunted down the Wallabies and the test series was won. It wasn't easy but it was never going to be. Much like the very long journey to this one moment of elation in their lives, the game had its twists and turns. This is not an easy path they have chosen. Their ability to cope with progress and setbacks is a life skill that has been burned into them since they were young. It will stand them in good stead forever.
The stars now shine brightly at the top of their personal and collective Everest. They are now series-winning Lions
When the stars are on the up, they burn brightly. The reflection from the star is hot. Their team-mates, special ones, siblings, companions and acquaintances feel the warmth of their glow. The happiest of days, celebrated in the instant, with smiles, craic, hugs, relief and joy.
The parental shadows are also glowing, but their warmth is of a different sort. It is purely internal. Their warmth radiates from the inside out.
It has little to do with the stars' heat. Its source is years of love and encouragement and of pushing and dragging. Long gone are the formative days that are rarely remembered. The wet and windy, cold and dark evenings where young fellas let off steam and run free while their shadows collect, drop, wait, feed, launder, and mostly just get by.
Over time carefree joy is overtaken by interest and belonging. Old friends. New friends. Great friends. Laughs and connections. A tribe has been found.
We will spend the next week in Sydney celebrating our good fortune.