The unexpected word that predicts whether your relationship will survive or fail: 'If it's missing so is your future'

Daily Mail​

10-06-2025

Have you ever wondered what truly keeps the spark alive in a relationship?
When you push beyond the unexplained chemistry, fatal attraction or those flirty good morning texts, Australian dating expert Louanne Ward has revealed there's one unexpected eight-letter word that may hold all the answers.
Forget everything you've been told about grand gestures or perfectly timed messages.
According to Louanne, the real sign someone is genuinely interested and emotionally invested in you is far more subtle - and it all comes down to the small things.
In a viral Instagram reel, Louanne has lifted the lid on the growing dating trend coined 'Pebbling' - a behaviour inspired by none other than penguins.
'Pebbling is when someone offers small, thoughtful actions that say, "I remembered", "I saw this and thought of you", "You matter, not just in the moment, but when you're not here",' she said.
'This one word decides if your relationship will thrive or fail... And if this is missing so is your future.'
The concept draws from the way penguins offer pebbles to potential mates as a sign of affection. In the human dating world, it translates to those micro-moments that might seem insignificant but are actually quietly monumental.
'They might reference something you said two weeks ago,' Louanne continued.
'They send you an article or a song because it reminded them of you. They grab your favourite snack without being asked. They call after an important appointment.'
These moments, are what Louanne stated, aren't just thoughtful, they're powerful.
They're signs of attention, effort, and intentionality. And they're what separates someone who's emotionally invested from someone who's simply enjoying the ride.
While consistency is often cited as a key trait in a healthy relationship, Louanne argued that real consistency isn't just about replying to texts or showing up on time.
'Because real consistency doesn't just mean following through on what you say or texting good morning. It's about how someone shows up.'
And when it comes to showing up, pebbling might just be the ultimate relationship litmus test.
'If they're not pebbling, they're not building,' Louanne warned. 'And no amount of charm or attraction will change that.'
Her followers were quick to praise the insight, with many admitting they'd never heard of the term but instantly recognised the behaviour - or the absence of it - in their own relationships.
So, next time you're analysing your partner's texts or trying to decode their behaviour, it might be worth zooming in on the little things instead.
Are they pebbling, or just passing time?
Because according to this dating expert, that could be the difference between a relationship that fizzles, and one that actually lasts.
Louanne, who is a qualified matchmaker and coach from Perth, Western Australia, has also revealed a lesser-known trick which she claims makes you instantly more attractive.
She claims the 'AT20 Eye Contact Rule' (Around-the-Target 20 per cent) will make you 'ten times more attractive' in conversations.
She said you should maintain direct eye contact for 20 per cent of the conversation then subtly shift your gaze around the rest of the face.
'If you stare too much, it can feel intense, creepy, or confrontational. If you avoid eye contact, you come across as nervous, uninterested, or lacking confidence,' Louanne explained on Instagram.
'But when you balance eye contact with subtle shifts - to their lips, cheekbones, or forehead - it creates a sense of natural intrigue and chemistry.
'Most people don't realise how small shifts in body language can completely change how they're perceived. If you want to create effortless chemistry and attraction in real-life interactions.'
Louanne said the tactic is 'backed by psychology' and works by 'creating mystery', 'mimicking romantic subconscious cues' and 'feeling natural'.
'Slightly breaking eye contact at key moments makes them want to pull you back in,' she wrote.