Latest news with #AnujaLuniya
Time of India
28-05-2025
- General
- Time of India
Dread answering calls? It's called telephobia
AI-generated image for representative purposes only Today, most Gen Z and Millennials often feel anxious or uneasy when their phone starts ringing. For generations who've grown up in a digital era, calls can feel awkward and unpredictable. According to Anuja Luniya, a behaviour expert, 'There's been a noticeable rise in phone-related anxiety, especially among younger adults. Many share that phone calls feel intrusive or energy-draining, like a sudden demand on their emotional bandwidth.' This phenomenon is called telephobia . Telephobia is not just about avoiding calls. It's the emotional uneasiness people feel when the phone rings. It can show up as panic, freeze, dread, or discomfort. In my practice, I've seen the condition rise significantly among Gen Z and Millennials. It's not that they don't want a connection. They're just emotionally overwhelmed Esha Bhardwaj, emotional wellness coach, therapist WHY GEN Zs DON'T LIKE ANSWERING CALLS Aishwarya Iyer (28) from Thane agreed to share her experience, over text, of course. 'For me, long phone conversations are anxiety-inducing and largely unnecessary. If something can be conveyed through texts, that's easier communication. I also feel that texting shows respect because you allow the other person to respond at their convenience.' Similarly, Purbali Sarmah (27) from Pune shares, 'I just can't do long conversations. Phone calls feel like too much pressure. With texts, I can respond on my own terms and exit the conversation when I need to. But talking on the phone? It drains me. by Taboola by Taboola Sponsored Links Sponsored Links Promoted Links Promoted Links You May Like Switch to UnionBank Rewards Card UnionBank Credit Card Apply Now Undo I only answer my parents' calls every day.' Pooja (27), based in London, adds, 'After being on calls with clients all day, who wants to take another call? I don't ignore calls from close family unless I'm too drained. When it comes to friends, I have a tier system. I'll take calls from my inner circle. The second-tier friends? Maybe 50 per cent of the time. Tertiary? Just text me.' According to Esha Bhardwaj, an emotional wellness coach and therapist, today's generation is functioning under the weight of emotional hyper-availability. 'There's an unspoken expectation to always be reachable. This has created a false sense of urgency. People aren't just afraid of phone calls. They fear the lack of space to pause, process, and respond with clarity. The pseudo-emergency culture bred by 24/7 connectivity has drained our capacity to relax, ease into conversations, or stay emotionally present. ' DOES THIS REFLECT AN UNDERLYING ISSUE? Avoiding phone calls may hint at deeper nervous system overload. 'In states of chronic stress or burnout, even small tasks like answering a call can feel like too much.' says Luniya. She adds, 'Constant exposure to alerts, deadlines, and emotional demands can keep the brain in a hypervigilant state. Communication that requires spontaneity or emotional energy begins to feel draining. For many, dodging calls is not just a preference. It's a red flag. A sign to pause, reset, and evaluate what's really exhausting the system.' However, she also notes that this phenomenon partly reflects a shift in how we connect. 'Thanks to digital advances, texts, DMs, and voice notes offer flexibility and control. These modes suit a generation that grew up online.' Reji Modiyil, a technology entrepreneur, adds, 'The younger generation prefers texting because it offers comfort and control. They can communicate at their own pace. It also reduces the social anxiety of spontaneous speech. Nonverbal modes are now the norm, especially for quick check-ins, even though phone calls and in-person chats still hold value for emotional expression or clarity.' IMPACT ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS The rise in phone anxiety is also affecting our personal relationships. Modiyil points out, 'Telephobia results in a loss of spontaneity and emotional nuance. Texting can feel detached and miss the nuances of voice, tone, pauses, and emphasis that come with verbal communication.' In relationships, dodging calls can come across as disinterest or emotional distance, even if that's not the intent. Luniya notes, 'If left unaddressed, phone anxiety can lower social confidence and deepen withdrawal. It also limits chances to practise presence, navigate discomfort, and build emotional intelligence. All of these are vital to social connection.' RIGHT WAY TO DEAL WITH THIS Being aware of your emotional needs and boundaries makes everything more manageable. Kanika Kishnani (28) from Ajmer says she's found a balance. 'I don't avoid all calls. I always answer calls from work and family. But I do avoid calls that can wait when I'm focused or deeply immersed in work. Messaging gives me the space to respond with intention without disrupting my flow. If something's urgent, people usually call twice. That's my cue to answer the call.' Today's generation is not emotionally disconnected. They are emotionally overconnected, stretched thin, and craving a connection that doesn't drain their energy. We don't need to shame people into returning calls. We need to help them build safer, softer ways to be present. Where boundaries are honoured, presence is respected, and peace isn't lost in the pursuit of performance Esha Bhardwaj, emotional wellness coach and therapist Bhardwaj recommends dealing with phone anxiety in emotionally mature ways: Create boundaries: Let people know you respond best with some notice Send voice notes: Practice listening and speaking without the stress of live response Take grounding breaths: Place a hand on your chest, breathe deeply before picking up Start small: Begin with calls from emotionally safe people and slowly build tolerance Daily nature walks: A 15-minute walk can help regulate emotional energy Use auto-responses: Try, 'Hey, saw your call. I'll get back once I settle down' Prioritise presence: Reply when you can be engaged, not just reactive Follow up with texts: A simple 'Hey, just catching my breath. Will call soon' helps Avoid ghosting: Silence can hurt more than a delayed reply Set a check-in window: Dedicate 10 minutes daily to follow up on missed calls Express intent: Let people know you care, even if you can't always respond right away One step to a healthier you—join Times Health+ Yoga and feel the change
Time of India
24-04-2025
- General
- Time of India
Speaker scum: A name for loud phone users
AI-generated image for representative purpose only Recently, a forum on Reddit coined the term ' speaker scum '. It refers to passengers who play music, watch videos, or take calls without using headphones. This was part of a discussion on travellers increasingly being frustrated by this new in-flight nuisance after 'gate lice' (passengers who crowd boarding gates) and 'seat squatters' (those who take unassigned seats), as reported by New York Post. This kind of nuisance, however, is not just restricted to air travel and is a common occurrence in Indian public transport. 'I have had to change seats because of speaker scums' Vaishnavi Merchant, a railway and bus commuter, frequently encounters speaker scums. She recalls, 'On my way to college for an exam, I sat next to a woman blaring reels on her phone. I couldn't study due to the disturbance. I thought I should tell her, but I resorted to giving her looks and covered my ears with my hands. But she didn't care. I eventually changed seats.' 'Despite requests, some passengers refuse to cooperate' Divya Bihani often commutes on express trains and is frequently disturbed by loud phone audio from fellow passengers, especially older individuals. 'It's very annoying,' she says, noting that it breaks her concentration especially when she's working on the go. She shares, 'One time, a passenger ignored multiple requests to turn down the volume of his phone, which led to an intervention by the authorities. People need to understand that in a shared space it's important to maintain some decorum.' 'Phones should have a feature of auto-lowering volume in public spaces' Abhishek Mithbawkar, another public transport commuter, faces the frustration of loud audio, especially from passengers seated nearby. He usually spends his travel time reading the news or a book, but the repetitive sound distracts him. He says, 'The situation worsens during events like T20 matches when people play live match commentary at full blast.' Abhishek suggests that mobile companies add a feature to lower the volume when travelling at high speeds and give pop-up reminders to be mindful of surroundings. Impact of loud sounds AI-generated image for representative purpose only Unexpected and repetitive noise increases cortisol levels, leading to agitation, irritability, and subconscious aggression Loud phone noise in public can cause ambient stress, keeping people on edge without them consciously recognising the cause, ultimately making daily commutes more mentally draining Instead of confronting the issue, people disengage by wearing headphones or avoiding public interactions altogether (As mentioned by Dr Anuja Luniya, a behaviour expert) Why some people watch videos on speaker in public There can be a combination of factors behind this. According to Dr Anuja Luniya, a behaviour expert, many use sound as a self-regulation tool — drowning out stress, anxiety, or the unpredictability and chaos of public spaces Luniya says, 'In some cases, it's a learned behaviour; people mirror their environment, and if public noise is normalised in their daily lives, they become desensitised to its impact on others' Further, social validation also plays a role. Luniya explains, 'Some use loud audio as a way to assert presence or connect with others, even in passive ways' Technology too, has blurred the lines between private and public space. The headphone culture has made people less used to shared auditory experiences, making intrusions feel more disturbing There can be a combination of factors behind this. According to Dr Anuja Luniya, a behaviour expert, many use sound as a self-regulation tool — drowning out stress, anxiety, or the unpredictability and chaos of public spaces Luniya says, 'In some cases, it's a learned behaviour; people mirror their environment, and if public noise is normalised in their daily lives, they become desensitised to its impact on others' Further, social validation also plays a role. Luniya explains, 'Some use loud audio as a way to assert presence or connect with others, even in passive ways' Technology too, has blurred the lines between private and public space. The headphone culture has made people less used to shared auditory experiences, making intrusions feel more disturbing
