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Irish Examiner
6 days ago
- General
- Irish Examiner
'I can be around people and feel like I am alone': Autistic adults report feeling lonely and isolated
'I'm not sure what it would be like to have a really good friend. That makes me sad. That is just one of the frustrated comments from autistic adults in Ireland talking about loneliness as part of a new survey. This person said they were also sad about not having a circle of friends 'even though I'm really loved online". "I'm loved for what I do. I'm much better, I suppose, with things that are at a distance.' The survey of 321 adults, for charity AsIAm, found just over half feel lonely all or most of the time, with just 9% saying they are rarely lonely. Some 69% feel 'left out of society' with almost three-quarters saying they 'often had to mask or change who they were to be accepted'. Many reported a limited social life, with 18% not going out socially in six months, and 17% for 12 months. Overall, more than a third said a relative was the person they typically had the most social interaction with. The group is aged between 18 and over 55, with 40% living at home with their parents. Another 32% live in their own homes. Comments on work also reflected isolation, with one saying: 'I can be around people, especially in work, and feel like I am alone. I do not feel included." The challenge of making friends was often raised. 'There are unwritten expectations placed on friendships and often I rely on others making the first contact as I don't feel comfortable initiating,' one person said. Almost all described being autistic as 'a driving force' behind being lonely. Asked to describe a good friend, one person said: 'Someone with whom I feel close to, who respects me, and expresses their opinions and knowledge without being condescending.' One person described friendship as: 'They understand me or at least try to. I know they care and are doing their best and will be there when they can. I do the same for them.' However others spoke of negative effects loneliness can have. 'When I get lonely, really lonely, I become physically cold,' one person said. I turn up the radiators. I hide under the covers. And empty. And spiteful. And envious. I find myself so often resenting people I see in groups, and I hate how bitter I am about it. Many spoke of using up their energy to interact with friends or even family. 'The majority of the world is not autistic, so I am expected to mould myself (at considerable cost) to presenting as non-autistic in order to have any acceptance or inclusion,' one person explained. The charity's chief executive Adam Harris said: 'Loneliness is not simply about being alone — it stems from not feeling accepted or understood.' He warned the findings showed many autistic people felt excluded. This group 'often feel compelled to mask their true selves in order to navigate daily life", he said. He called on the Government to fully implement the Autism Innovation Strategy. This needs to be properly funded, he stressed, adding: 'We would call for Budget 2026 to reflect this need.' The charity also recommended practical changes to everyday life. These should include easier access to personal supports, transport, and inclusive public spaces. An estimated one in 65 people are autistic in Ireland, according to the National Council for Special Education.
Irish Examiner
17-07-2025
- Business
- Irish Examiner
Disability groups challenge Government to 'show me the money' in budget
Will this year's budget translate general election promises on disability services into cold hard cash? Disability groups have essentially said 'show me the money' to Government in a series of pre-budget submissions this week. Inclusion Ireland represents people with intellectual disabilities and their families. Its data shows social welfare supports do not match the needs of 66% of adults with an intellectual disability, so it wants core disability payments raised above the poverty threshold. One in four families said their child received no early intervention therapies. This needs investment in children's disability network teams (CDNTs), the submission recommended. CEO Derval McDonagh said: 'Our community is not looking for short-term fixes; we demand long-term thinking and ambition from our leaders.' Its survey of 1,000 people identified 'significant gaps' between people's lived experiences and what the State is obliged to provide under the UN Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. The Disability Federation of Ireland referred back to the programme for government promise of 'a step change in the supports and services required by people with disabilities". The federation's campaign call is 'deliver the step change'. It also argued for an increase in core social protection rates to reflect the true cost of living with a disability. The Disability Federation of Ireland said councils should be funded to make sure 7.5% of all new housing is suitable for wheelchair users. The CDNTs need at least 75 extra full-time therapists and staff, it said. It also called for more assessment of need funding. Councils should be funded to make sure 7.5% of all new housing is suitable for wheelchair users. The federation pointed out the voluntary charity sector delivers over 70% of disability services here. This needs sustainable, multi-annual funding it said. As I Am, Ireland's autism charity, focused on strategies and policies already in existence but in need of funding to roll-out fully. It called for resourcing of the Autism Innovation Strategy. It echoed calls for a weekly cost of disability payment, and also recommended a 10% increase in disability, carers, and domiciliary care allowances. CEO Adam Harris, brother to Tánaiste Simon Harris, said: 'Budget 2026 must confront the uncomfortable reality that our systems are failing autistic people, from year-long waits for services to social exclusion and financial strain." Norma Foley, minister for children, disability and equality and Hildegarde Naughton, junior minister for disability will soon be sitting in on heated budget discussions. They now have a shopping list prepared by people directly impacted by the reality of disability. Can they deliver the money is the question. Read More Letters to the Editor: System fails people with disabilities
