25-06-2025
'My partner brought it home': agony of living with HIV and losing friends
When Baden Willmott was diagnosed with HIV, he was given two years to live.
"I was told, go home, write a will and get your affairs in order," said Mr Willmott, of Newcastle.
"It's 32 years later and I'm still here."
Mr Willmott, now 59, was diagnosed at age 27 while living in Melbourne.
"My partner brought it home," he said.
Mr Willmott has "undetectable, therefore non-transmittable, HIV".
"It's under control. I take six tablets a day," he said.
"But there are comorbidities that come with it and they're causing me problems now."
He said keeping the disease at bay was a "catch-22".
"The drugs can cause problems with your kidneys and liver," he said.
"And I have a bad back, hip and knees from the career I've had over the years as a horticulturalist."
He remains hopeful that a cure for HIV will be discovered.
The Newcastle Herald reported on Tuesday that the Hunter New England Health district recorded 20 cases of HIV in 2024.
This rose from 12 and four cases in the previous two years respectively. The highest number of cases in the district in recent years was in 2014 (27) and 2019 (23).
Mr Willmott said living with the virus had caused "mental health issues I never thought I'd have".
"I have bad PTSD and survivor's guilt," he said.
"My best friend from high school died from AIDS in 1988. He went to Canada for three years and came back with the virus."
His friend's family was religious.
"As far as his family was concerned, he had cancer. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral, so I couldn't get closure.
"I lost over 14 friends in the 1980s."
He said the stigma around HIV was "still bad".
Most people with the virus mostly keep it to themselves.
"I don't mind talking about it because of the great support I have and my role as chairperson of Karumah Incorporated," Mr Willmott said.
"It's a NSW Health-funded organisation that supports people living with HIV and their family and friends.
"I make sure people know that they can live a long life with the virus and get support."
He was concerned about the younger generation being cavalier about HIV.
"They didn't go through the '80s and '90s. I worry that they think it can be cured and it's not a problem."
He noted there was a medication available that "you can take if you think you're exposed".
But he was concerned that some people rely on this without taking other precautions, such as practising safe sex.
"I felt so much anger towards the person that gave me the virus," he said.
"I've had a lot of counselling. I still see a counsellor every fortnight.
"Every time something happens that pulls me back, I have to speak to someone about it."
He said it was difficult to find professionals who know about HIV and are willing to talk about it.
"There's only a certain number of counsellors in Newcastle who are willing to do that," he said.
"That's where Karumah's support is helpful.
When Baden Willmott was diagnosed with HIV, he was given two years to live.
"I was told, go home, write a will and get your affairs in order," said Mr Willmott, of Newcastle.
"It's 32 years later and I'm still here."
Mr Willmott, now 59, was diagnosed at age 27 while living in Melbourne.
"My partner brought it home," he said.
Mr Willmott has "undetectable, therefore non-transmittable, HIV".
"It's under control. I take six tablets a day," he said.
"But there are comorbidities that come with it and they're causing me problems now."
He said keeping the disease at bay was a "catch-22".
"The drugs can cause problems with your kidneys and liver," he said.
"And I have a bad back, hip and knees from the career I've had over the years as a horticulturalist."
He remains hopeful that a cure for HIV will be discovered.
The Newcastle Herald reported on Tuesday that the Hunter New England Health district recorded 20 cases of HIV in 2024.
This rose from 12 and four cases in the previous two years respectively. The highest number of cases in the district in recent years was in 2014 (27) and 2019 (23).
Mr Willmott said living with the virus had caused "mental health issues I never thought I'd have".
"I have bad PTSD and survivor's guilt," he said.
"My best friend from high school died from AIDS in 1988. He went to Canada for three years and came back with the virus."
His friend's family was religious.
"As far as his family was concerned, he had cancer. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral, so I couldn't get closure.
"I lost over 14 friends in the 1980s."
He said the stigma around HIV was "still bad".
Most people with the virus mostly keep it to themselves.
"I don't mind talking about it because of the great support I have and my role as chairperson of Karumah Incorporated," Mr Willmott said.
"It's a NSW Health-funded organisation that supports people living with HIV and their family and friends.
"I make sure people know that they can live a long life with the virus and get support."
He was concerned about the younger generation being cavalier about HIV.
"They didn't go through the '80s and '90s. I worry that they think it can be cured and it's not a problem."
He noted there was a medication available that "you can take if you think you're exposed".
But he was concerned that some people rely on this without taking other precautions, such as practising safe sex.
"I felt so much anger towards the person that gave me the virus," he said.
"I've had a lot of counselling. I still see a counsellor every fortnight.
"Every time something happens that pulls me back, I have to speak to someone about it."
He said it was difficult to find professionals who know about HIV and are willing to talk about it.
"There's only a certain number of counsellors in Newcastle who are willing to do that," he said.
"That's where Karumah's support is helpful.
When Baden Willmott was diagnosed with HIV, he was given two years to live.
"I was told, go home, write a will and get your affairs in order," said Mr Willmott, of Newcastle.
"It's 32 years later and I'm still here."
Mr Willmott, now 59, was diagnosed at age 27 while living in Melbourne.
"My partner brought it home," he said.
Mr Willmott has "undetectable, therefore non-transmittable, HIV".
"It's under control. I take six tablets a day," he said.
"But there are comorbidities that come with it and they're causing me problems now."
He said keeping the disease at bay was a "catch-22".
"The drugs can cause problems with your kidneys and liver," he said.
"And I have a bad back, hip and knees from the career I've had over the years as a horticulturalist."
He remains hopeful that a cure for HIV will be discovered.
The Newcastle Herald reported on Tuesday that the Hunter New England Health district recorded 20 cases of HIV in 2024.
This rose from 12 and four cases in the previous two years respectively. The highest number of cases in the district in recent years was in 2014 (27) and 2019 (23).
Mr Willmott said living with the virus had caused "mental health issues I never thought I'd have".
"I have bad PTSD and survivor's guilt," he said.
"My best friend from high school died from AIDS in 1988. He went to Canada for three years and came back with the virus."
His friend's family was religious.
"As far as his family was concerned, he had cancer. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral, so I couldn't get closure.
"I lost over 14 friends in the 1980s."
He said the stigma around HIV was "still bad".
Most people with the virus mostly keep it to themselves.
"I don't mind talking about it because of the great support I have and my role as chairperson of Karumah Incorporated," Mr Willmott said.
"It's a NSW Health-funded organisation that supports people living with HIV and their family and friends.
"I make sure people know that they can live a long life with the virus and get support."
He was concerned about the younger generation being cavalier about HIV.
"They didn't go through the '80s and '90s. I worry that they think it can be cured and it's not a problem."
He noted there was a medication available that "you can take if you think you're exposed".
But he was concerned that some people rely on this without taking other precautions, such as practising safe sex.
"I felt so much anger towards the person that gave me the virus," he said.
"I've had a lot of counselling. I still see a counsellor every fortnight.
"Every time something happens that pulls me back, I have to speak to someone about it."
He said it was difficult to find professionals who know about HIV and are willing to talk about it.
"There's only a certain number of counsellors in Newcastle who are willing to do that," he said.
"That's where Karumah's support is helpful.
When Baden Willmott was diagnosed with HIV, he was given two years to live.
"I was told, go home, write a will and get your affairs in order," said Mr Willmott, of Newcastle.
"It's 32 years later and I'm still here."
Mr Willmott, now 59, was diagnosed at age 27 while living in Melbourne.
"My partner brought it home," he said.
Mr Willmott has "undetectable, therefore non-transmittable, HIV".
"It's under control. I take six tablets a day," he said.
"But there are comorbidities that come with it and they're causing me problems now."
He said keeping the disease at bay was a "catch-22".
"The drugs can cause problems with your kidneys and liver," he said.
"And I have a bad back, hip and knees from the career I've had over the years as a horticulturalist."
He remains hopeful that a cure for HIV will be discovered.
The Newcastle Herald reported on Tuesday that the Hunter New England Health district recorded 20 cases of HIV in 2024.
This rose from 12 and four cases in the previous two years respectively. The highest number of cases in the district in recent years was in 2014 (27) and 2019 (23).
Mr Willmott said living with the virus had caused "mental health issues I never thought I'd have".
"I have bad PTSD and survivor's guilt," he said.
"My best friend from high school died from AIDS in 1988. He went to Canada for three years and came back with the virus."
His friend's family was religious.
"As far as his family was concerned, he had cancer. I wasn't allowed to go to his funeral, so I couldn't get closure.
"I lost over 14 friends in the 1980s."
He said the stigma around HIV was "still bad".
Most people with the virus mostly keep it to themselves.
"I don't mind talking about it because of the great support I have and my role as chairperson of Karumah Incorporated," Mr Willmott said.
"It's a NSW Health-funded organisation that supports people living with HIV and their family and friends.
"I make sure people know that they can live a long life with the virus and get support."
He was concerned about the younger generation being cavalier about HIV.
"They didn't go through the '80s and '90s. I worry that they think it can be cured and it's not a problem."
He noted there was a medication available that "you can take if you think you're exposed".
But he was concerned that some people rely on this without taking other precautions, such as practising safe sex.
"I felt so much anger towards the person that gave me the virus," he said.
"I've had a lot of counselling. I still see a counsellor every fortnight.
"Every time something happens that pulls me back, I have to speak to someone about it."
He said it was difficult to find professionals who know about HIV and are willing to talk about it.
"There's only a certain number of counsellors in Newcastle who are willing to do that," he said.
"That's where Karumah's support is helpful.
