6 days ago
Facing the void those gone missing leave behind
By
In the days after 37-year-old Mathieu Therrien-Meunier went missing in the winter of 2024, presumably while hiking in the Laurentian mountains, his mother went into problem-solving mode.
It was the middle of February, and the weekend had been marked by particularly cold weather and a heavy snowstorm.
Nicole Meunier retraced her son's favourite trails, helped police in search efforts by snowmobile and horseback, and co-ordinated with local hikers eager to help.
But as the weeks passed and searches yielded few clues, the reality of what she faced began to sink in.
'At first it's a crisis, it's all panic and searching,' Meunier, 64, said in a recent interview from her home in Ste-Adèle. 'But when that shock wears off, you fall into a void. And then you have no one to turn to.'
According to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, more than 10,000 disappearances were reported across Quebec in 2024. While most cases are solved within a week, many remain unsolved, plunging the families left behind in a whirlwind of uncertainty.
Despite the challenges they face, the families have few resources available to assist them through the process — a gap in services that often complicates their healing and prolongs their grief.
A recent study is now urging the Quebec government to recognize the families' needs and provide them with the support it argues they desperately need.
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As a criminology student and researcher with the Association des familles de personnes assassinées ou disparues (AFPAD), Alexandre Benchaa knew how difficult it can be for families when a loved one goes missing.
But it wasn't until he decided to study the issue last fall that he realized how much support is lacking.
'They are not recognized and have no access to services,' Benchaa said in a recent interview.
Benchaa met with different stakeholders to better understand the matter, including eight families, notaries and an investigator from the Montreal police department's missing persons unit.
The resulting study, produced in collaboration with the Justice Centre for Victims of Crime (CJVAC), spells out the broad needs of families, from practical legal advice to psychological support.
It also details the financial strain the situation puts on loved ones, with parents often unable to return to work given the emotional weight of the search.
The 67-page document presents over a dozen recommendations. Its main takeaway: that the Quebec government should officially recognize the families as victims.
The study notes that victims of crime in Quebec, and their relatives in certain cases, are granted an official status which allows them to access financial assistance through the province's Indemnisation des victimes d'actes criminels plan (IVAC).
It also grants them access to certain services, such as psychosocial support or administrative help, through the province's network of Crime Victims Assistance Centres (CAVAC).
Meantime, the relatives of people who have been reported missing are not considered victims in the legal sense.
The study argues this leaves the families of the missing in a 'grey zone' that deprives them of most of the financial and legal assistance offered by the state.
'It is completely paradoxical,' Benchaa said. 'When a person goes missing, sometimes it's an even more complicated form of grief because of how ambiguous it is.'
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Huguette Boisvert can't remember the exact details of what she did immediately after reporting her son missing last year, but has a clear memory of how helpless she felt in the aftermath.
'I felt completely abandoned,' Boisvert, 63, said from her home in Sherbrooke.
Boisvert had noticed a change in her son, Jonathan B.-Bourgeois, in early 2024. Typically buoyant and easygoing, the 34-year-old had become withdrawn and began having what she describes as paranoid thoughts.
One night that January, she awoke to a faint knock on her first-floor bedroom window. It was Jonathan, panicked and convinced that someone was following him.
Boisvert spent the following day with him, but he left around dinner, assuring her that he was OK.
When she couldn't get through to him the next day, she went to his apartment only to find he wasn't home. Police located his car on the side of a road outside the city a few days later. He left no other trace behind.
After the initial searches were complete, Boisvert says police told her to contact a lawyer for guidance on what to do next.
But she couldn't find one who could help.
'We were completely in the dark,' Boisvert said. 'I had to Google what to do, all while in distress and wondering where my son was.'
Every next step was complicated, from trying to end Jonathan's lease with his landlord to eventually getting rid of his car with the Société de l'assurance automobile du Québec.
Compounding it all was her grief. To this day, Boisvert said, she can't bring herself to enjoy anything without wondering what happened to her son, 'as if I'm not allowed to feel happiness.'
On her worst nights, she's kept awake by the sound of him knocking on her window echoing in her mind.
'There needs to be something to make things easier for families,' she said.
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Besides the Missing Children's Network, which specializes in missing youths, the AFPAD is the only organization in Quebec dedicated to helping the families of people who go missing.
It publishes guides for loved ones to understand the steps to take, accompanies families through the process and co-ordinates support groups.
But it remains a non-profit with limited resources and, as the study points out, does not have the capacity to assist every family that needs help in the province.
'That's the reality we're facing,' Benchaa said, noting the organization also helps the families of homicide victims.
Contacted for this article, a spokesperson for the Quebec Justice Department said it has received the study on families' needs and is analyzing its findings.
The department pointed out that victims of criminal offences and their families can access certain services through the CAVAC network.
It also noted that if it's determined a disappearance is the result of a criminal offence, relatives of the missing person may be eligible to obtain financial help through IVAC.
While true, Benchaa pointed out that only a small percentage of disappearances in the province meet the criteria.
And even if investigators suspect a criminal element, it can take years for the case to be officially classified as a crime — time during which families are left without support.
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Nearly a year and a half after Mathieu's disappearance, Meunier still has moments where it doesn't feel real. Then it hits her all at once.
She remembers those first few months, after the snow had melted and the river thawed, police conducted more searches in the area. They used a helicopter to survey the land, but to no avail.
Mathieu's missing person notice remains on the Sûreté du Québec's website today, but Meunier understands police no longer consider the case a priority.
She has thought about dedicating her time to searching nearby mountains and woods herself, but realizes that wouldn't be healthy either.
Almost every time she has dealt with a government agency since the disappearance, she said, she's received a similar response: a prolonged silence, followed by an employee telling her they don't know what to do.
'Every time you hear that, it's like a knife through the heart,' Meunier said.
The ambiguity of the situation has added another layer of grief. There was never a funeral, because they have no confirmation of his death. Nor is there a tombstone or memorial for Meunier and her family to gather at when needed.
On Mathieu's birthday, Meunier's two daughters surprised her by taking the day off. They went for a hike in the woods together and played songs that reminded them of him, crying as they walked.
On the first anniversary of his disappearance, they marked the occasion by getting matching tattoos. Not in Mathieu's memory, because Meunier said that didn't feel right, but rather in his honour.
She has slowly come to terms with the fact they may never know what happened. But that uncertainty is precisely why families have so many recurring needs, she said.
'Our lives are roller-coasters.'
Follow More of Our Reporting on Montreal Missing Persons News
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Jesse Feith
montrealgazette
Jesse Feith is a general assignment reporter with The Gazette since 2014.
