3 days ago
'I hated running before, but it became my escape'
Nick Hodges says "he didn't know what to do with himself" after he lost his 10-month-old son Bodie in a choking he then started to go out for a run for "a bit of headspace" and it soon became his coping mechanism."I started to realise that actually as well as the physical benefits, it was giving me time to think things through and get my head straight. It had benefits for my wellbeing as I was trying to navigate grief early on", he said."I hated running before, but it became my escape - a space to reflect, to heal."
Nick, who is from Leicester, said he realised there was very little support for bereaved parents - and set up the Bodie Hodges foundation in his son's memory, which provides one to one counselling for parents for two years after they have lost a child. The 49-year-old is now part of a group preparing to take on the Great North Run for the tenth time on 7 September in Newcastle to help fund the foundation's work.
'Absolutely devastating time'
Following the accident in May 2012, Bodie was rushed to Leicester Royal Infirmary and placed on life support for three to four said: "We received the news no parent wants to receive - that he wasn't going to make it."Bodie remained in hospital for another six or seven days and became an organ donor, Nick added. "It was an absolutely devastating time and it was a situation where we as parents had incredible support inside the hospital, the nurses, pastoral support and consultants were amazing. "But when we walked out, we realised that particularly when it's been an unexpected death, the support was pretty much non-existent."We were pretty much left with a couple of national helplines and 'off you go, go and fend for yourself', and you're trying to navigate a new world of grief and not knowing who to turn to and what to do."Nick said the "strength and courage" Bodie showed in hospital and the parents' lived experience was the inspiration to start the charity - which supported other families who have been bereaved of a child.
The Bodie Hodges Foundation was founded in 2013 and Nick said the its counselling service includes a dads' group called 'chips and a chat', where members meet monthly to take part in a social spoke about how running had helped him in casual conversations during group sessions, which inspired some members to take up said there were about 40 runners in the Great North Run this year raising money for the charity, with six of whom are parents who have lost a added all the runners had "various reasons" about why they wanted to take part part. "Some are a little like how I am - shouting from the rooftops because they want to keep their child's name alive", he added the tenth Great North Run held "deep significance" for him as it marked the number of months Bodie was alive.
"He may have only been around for 10 months but he's had a significant impact on the world even though he wasn't around for long."Across the 10 years it's really good knowing through the charity, through events like running how it is helping other people now. "Having had that lived experience, there's still not a word that can describe what it is like when your child dies. You just can't explain it, there's nothing in anyway which gets across what it feels. "You can try your best to explain it, but trying to learn to grow your lives again around the grief that you hold is difficult."Nick added apart from when the event was cancelled due to Covid in 2020, this would be the tenth Great North Run he had done in a row and said: "It's taken a long time to accept, but I'm actually a runner."
